Brittany Murphy, the fat weird girl in Clueless and the skinny weird girl in many other movies, has died of cardiac arrest at the age of 32. TMZ reports:

A 911 call was made at 8:00 AM from a home in Los Angeles that is listed as belonging to her husband, Simon Monjack, the Los Angeles City Fire Department tells TMZ. We're told Murphy was taken to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center where she was pronounced dead on arrival. Murphy starred in such films as "Clueless," "8 Mile," and "Don't Say a Word."

As Sgt. Doakes says, "it's always the husband", so I'm going to go ahead and blame him and drugs for her death. Because it's always completely normal when a 32 woman drops dead because she has the heart of a premie with AIDS. Her husband has long been rumored to be a con artist with a criminal past, so I can speculate as much as I want. I mean, the Panthers are 5-8. What the hell else am I gonna do today?

A special thanks to Chris for texting me like I'm a call girl and sexxxy Gina for doing my job for me today.

You've seen the pics and the video from Lindsay Lohan's pro-smoking ad Muse photoshoot, so now here's the outtakes. It's still Lindsay looking like a truck stop hooker who would give you a blowjob for a Mtn Dew and a nicotine patch, but with way more areola.

THE BANNER PIC. YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO.

Once in a generation, a Playboy pictorial comes along that opens our minds and causes a paradigm shift in what we believe to be feminine beauty and challenges us to abandon society's norms. This is not one of those times.


CLICK ON THE BANNER PIC TO SEE WHAT A DAY SHIFT STRIPPER LOOKS LIKE IN LACE AND FILTERED LIGHTING. (NSFW)

America's Best Dance Crew judge is a child molester [Popeater]
Ashley Greene is hot. That is all. [Popoholic]
Jack Bauer interrogates Santa Claus [College Humor]
Bar Refaeli is naked [Egotastic]
Paris Hilton infested upskirt [TaxiDriver Movie]
Lindsay Lohan looks very alert [Celebslam]
20 Most Oogled Women of Playboy 2009. So, uh, #19? How you doin'? [COED Magazine]
Denise Milani. Dear God in heaven [Heyman Hustle]
Justin Timberlake is banging Rihanna [Cele|bitchy]
Bai Ling 23,465th nip slip [Cityrag]

BANNER PIC: The insanely hot Kelly Carlson from Nip/Tuck. Christian just made her have an abortion. Why won't he love her???!!!

I really needed to go to the Sherlock Holmes premiere last night, but the paint on my miniature Civil War battle scene needed to be touched up, and my grandma told me to cook my own dinner, so I was a little busy. Easy Mac is so confusing!

Spencer Pratt is barely famous, so I guess coming out of the same vagina makes you barely famous, too. I have no idea why Maxim thought it would be a good idea to put this completely average chick five pages, but I'm not even remotely joking when I say I can take a two minute walk downtown and see a thousand chicks hotter than this skank. If this photoshoot was taken at Raleigh Times she would be the girl in the corner showing people pictures of her cat in his Santa hat.

Coco has posted another picture of her comically gigantic ass on Twitter again. I realize the inclusion of the stripper heels are supposed to let me know this is sexy, but it kinda sends mixed signals when you look like a controller on a Hungry Hungry Hippos game.

Zoe Saldana showed up to the Avatar premiere last night, and I'm not sure if she got my letters or not, but when I said I would drill her until we were no longer dependent on foreign oil, I meant that as a compliment.