Wilmer Valderrama Is Has a Tool
On a day off from cruising high school parking lots in search of the next star struck piece of jailbait to call his girlfriend, Wilmer Valderrama visited the Howard Stern show to brag about the famous girls he's dated. He said he didn't take Mandy Moore's virginity, but they were "each other's first loves." He rated Jennifer Love Hewitt an 8 out of 10 in the sack. When Howard asked if he gets these girls because he has a big package, Wilmer said he's hung at over 8 inches. Wilmer was fairly complimentary of everyone's favorite anorexic Ginger Kid, Lindsay Lohan, and said she is one of the best girls he's had in bed. Wilmer said he's had anal sex with one of these famous girls, but won't say who that was. And he wouldn't admit he had sex with Ashlee Simpson. But I don't know anyone who would. However, I think it's safe to assume that she's the one who opened her back door for Wilmer. She's young, insecure and an uglier version of her older sister, so she has all the makings of a big whore who'll go the extra mile for male attention. Me, I do it for awards. Yeah, so they're just Chuck E. Cheese tokens on shoestrings, but I have a house full of them which is a heck of a lot better than your fancy college degrees, and furniture, and appliances and stuff. So there.
You can read the synopsis of the interview here.
Jenna Jameson pictures for no other reason than they're not Ashlee Simpson:
36 Comments:
I like what Jenna is doing with her tongue in that second pic.
By Anonymous, on 4:03 PM
Who gives a fuck about Wilmer? He is obviously lying. Show more Jenna!
By Anonymous, on 4:17 PM
Nasty = I wouldn't be braggin' about any of that... a Tool = more like a prescription for meds.
By goingaway, on 5:50 PM
missfortunehunter
Nasty = I wouldn't be braggin' about any of that.
You would if you had a dick.
I'd brag about a casual acquaintence if he managed to nail Jennifer Love Hewitt--especially if said acquantence nailed said celeb in the smelliest of loveholes.
Damn right, I'd be braggin'.
By Gonzo, on 6:34 PM
why are you hatin on ashlee so bad? you should be hatin on lindsay. that girl is busted and definitely the one who "opened the back door for wilmer". ew!
By Anonymous, on 6:45 PM
Naw, you were right the first time.. He IS a tool.
By Mateo, on 7:22 PM
Tool Tool Tool.... not even that. just a loser.
By Mateo, on 7:22 PM
Jenna's boobs look sore. What is she going to do with them when she's 70? Yuck.
By Anonymous, on 8:10 PM
Nice that Wildebeast admits to having sex with UNDERAGE girls (i.e Lohan) He's nothing more than a less talented version of Eric Estrada for christ sake (can it get much worse than that?)
p/s..only Tara Reid has uglier tits than Jenna. I'd bet they had the same surgeon.
By Anonymous, on 8:47 PM
If "Jenna" stays in the sun too long, her face and tits melt. Nasty.
By Anonymous, on 9:08 PM
why do i get the feeling that he nailed Mandy Moore in the ass. It just seems so wrong and goes against her good girl/virginal image that it would be almost easy to believe.
but, yeah, ashlee simpson is certainly the most obvious otherwise.
By Anonymous, on 9:34 PM
He has an 8+ inch wang? Yeah... maybe in his dreams.
I watched That 70's Show bud.... you wear some tight ass pants in the show and there aint no way your package is anywhere near being that big.
Even flacid... if your peter was 8+ inches long it would still be bigger than a half pack of lifesavers.
What a douche....
By Anonymous, on 9:58 PM
If I was untalented like Wilmer, I would go to Howard Stern show and said that I have big "tool" and I have sex with all Hollywood, becouse he's nothing...Or maybe he's gay or his "tool" like a baby finger... Anyway if he had anal that I think bluff he had it with Lindsay(Lindsack) becouse she's only who have sex with all(including: dogs, cats, Wilmer and something like this)
By Anonymous, on 12:52 AM
Really, I bet Lindsay let him put it in her booty. She probably was so lit she didn't know that was the wrong hole.
By Bama Girl, on 5:50 AM
I wonder if he used the FES voice when he was banging them?
Do u like sthis bitch?! I know u do you dirthy nasthty american slthut.
By Anonymous, on 5:59 AM
Yeee! WHAT is Jenna doing with her tongue?! It looks like she had it split down the middle like that lizard dude. She used to be so hot but I think all that hyperventilating and moaning is depriving her brain of oxygen.
By Anonymous, on 6:02 AM
anonymous 09:58, I agree, what a douche. The only person on the planet who's named names in the same self-congratulating way was Dennis Rodman. And now he's the biggest star on the planet, so way to go Wilmer, way to go. What a jack ass.
By KItty X, on 6:28 AM
jennifer love hewitt acts all innocent... and here she is fucking a manslut
By Anonymous, on 6:30 AM
Jenna's armpit looks like a vagina in the 3rd & 4th pic.
By Anonymous, on 7:29 AM
Thank God Howard got a bigger studio, Wilmers ego would never have fit into the old one.
And 9:58, you're spot on.
By Anonymous, on 7:41 AM
8 inches isn't even impressive. I myself pack a 12 by 2 and the girls go wild. Thats 12 inches...around. I have to go in sideways.
By The Mzzle, on 7:46 AM
Good lord The Mzzle made my heart jump as i write this commment....
Funny thing i just heard that interview on my recorded shows from the 27th. It was a great interview..I miss having someone to talk to about the show.. I'm the only one out of all my friend who cares and needs howie enough to pay for him. I'm gonna have to check your blog more often.
I'm still thinking about mzzle.
By Brandi Love, on 9:00 AM
Umm mzzle, are you single? Because I can be.
By Anonymous, on 9:49 AM
Damn "brandi love" sounds like a horny slut! What City & State do you live in?
By Anonymous, on 10:19 AM
Mine is a realistic 9 1/2 inch with about 4 1/2 around. I would love to share it with Jennifer Love Hewitt!
By Anonymous, on 10:36 AM
I never thought he had much of a dick looking at him in tight pants on That 70s Show but he most definitely has more than Ashton Kutcher. I think A.K. suffers from micropenis...
By Anonymous, on 10:55 AM
I bet the people who are talking shit about Jenna are girls. I'm a female, but at least I can give that girl for being hot and sexually confident. The rest of you sound like catty bitches who are intimidated.
By Anonymous, on 11:01 AM
you know it was lindsay who took it up the butt. and i'm digusted he rated Jennifer Love H that high. i don't know her, and God willing, never will, but i absolutely despise her. i hope she hooks up with stavros and gets herpes
By Anonymous, on 11:09 AM
I'm so glad that you posted pics of Jenna rather than The Anorexic Club.
By sam991, on 12:46 PM
Jenna Jameson looks like Marg Helgenberger. Same face. And yeah those boobs intimidate me, they're lopsided.
Wilmer is gross. End of story.
By Anonymous, on 12:50 PM
Horny, picky, slut!Chicken ass anonyomous!
By Brandi Love, on 1:26 PM
maybe I'm just old, but when i was growing up, if somebody we knew kissed and told in a way that was self-promoting and reckless he was considered scum. What a loser.
By Anonymous, on 9:51 PM
I am waiting for Lohan, Love Hewit, Moore, and Simpson to chime in with their versions now. He spills the beans, and all bets are off. It is offically open season for his ass now. A few "His ego far exceeds his goods" comments ought to deflate his "Love God" image pretty well. What a jerk!
By Anonymous, on 7:49 AM
Fez....Fez, Fez Fez. Why does this article remind me of that episode where his parents played the record backwards and he laughed, and said..."In my country,he said I wanna sex you're monkey...which I've...never done." LMAO. Sorry. LMAO. So sorry.
By I Dont Like Moths, on 12:56 PM
Wow - the thought of Ashlee's perfect little ass getting serviced is amazing!
I hope it wasn't her - my fantasy of licking Ash's Ass is less appealing knowing that Fez was in there.
By Anonymous, on 3:57 PM
Theodor Herzl, Founder of Zionism in 1897:
“It is essential that the sufferings of Jews. . . become worse. . . this will assist in realization of our plans. . .I have an excellent idea. . . I shall induce anti-semites to liquidate Jewish wealth. . . The anti-semites will assist us thereby in that they will strengthen the persecution and oppression of Jews. The anti-semites shall be our best friends”.
-- From Herzl's Diary
By Anonymous, on 2:01 PM
Post a Comment
<< Continue Reading IDontLikeYouInThatWay.com