Britney Spears is hiring acting coaches to come to her Malibu home and teach her how to act. One of the four coaches she hired only lasted two lessons before Britney gave up, and the coach who asked to remain anonymous is speaking out on what it was like to work with Britney.

Britney is an untalented, self-focused wannabe. I can imagine her ruining a televised drama by suddenly staring straight into camera and either winking, shaking her boobs or blowing a bubble of gum. But not all at the same time that would be asking far too much of her." The coach, who gave acting lessons to Britney at her Malibu home, also revealed that the singer dismissed William Shakespeare and Nobel Prize winner Harold Pinter 'as not part of my world.' Of Shakespeare she said: 'I know who he is, know he's dead and I don't want any knights-in-armour stuff.' And when asked to read from a Harold Pinter play the singer held up a hand to shut her drama coach up, before scoffing: 'Whoever Pinto is, or was.'

Britney sucks at everything she does, but still makes millions, so why bother learning how to be good at any of them? Hell, I can be pretty lazy, too. Yesterday I didn't feel like cleaning, so I wrote "Sparkles and Shines" on a piece of paper and threw it on the kitchen floor. Then I wrote "April Fresh" on another paper and threw it on my pile of laundry. So as far as I was concerned, the chores were done. Unfortunately it turns out writing "Fully Cooked" on the raw chicken, and then "Not Throwing Up" on my forehead didn't work out as well as I'd hoped.

Brit and K-Spawn on May 5th: