Jessica is so fucking ugly I can't stand looking at her hook nose and giant chin. She looks like a fucking drag queen. Thank God those JLH pics were there to make my dick feel better.
Jessica's Simpson's cd is complete shit, and she looks manly, etc....it's all been said (although, I still prefer her to Ashlee anyday)
But what's I'm really wondering about is Jennifer Love Hewitt's hips...I mean, I knew the girl was pear-shaped, and she even admits to it in magazines....but DAMN! they look enormous! Maybe she's trying to revive her career with some pregnancy rumours.
JLH is getting more full figure as she ages. Her cans ( o ) ( o ) are also getting more full. Nice. As far as "vagina-begging", I've known a few guys like this, but never been one.
In the fourth pic it looks like Ken Paves (Jessicas professional hair-stylist/scrotum sucker) is in the background. YOu know the only reason he's even associated with her is because she really is a tranny in disguise.
JLH is still very lovely. Her face is so diminutive and pixie-like that it makes the rest of her body look even larger.
As for Chestica, someone must have told her that woman with large breasts who "pout" are considered sexy because she sure over-works this look ad nauseaum.
OK, I agree John Mayer has an amazing talent and although it has been somewhat misguided, he has created some great music. His acoustic guitar solo in "Neon" is jaw dropping, but he must be someone who cannot bear to have an intellectual conversion in his private life because his choice in women only spells out.. B-O-O-B-S!
This is not okay. She's gone too far. And what's this shit about her 'tiptoeing back into the dating word' because from what I've heard she's fucked everyone from Dane Cook to Bam. So... whatever.
Mayer looks like that guy with the nasally laugh who always wants to give you massages and touches himself inappropriately in the back of the movie theater.
Hewitt actually looks pretty damn hot. She's still a vapid whore, but her body is bangin with that extra 10 pounds on it.
I think Jennifer Love looks great, and normally she is way overrated. it would help if she wore a better bra so her breasts balanced out her hips some. John Mayer needs to cut his sodium intake way back.
August 30, 2006 11:32 AM
actually, all the answers to the animal quiz are "jackass"
I'd tap it. All of it. ESPECIALLY John Mayer. If his lyrics hadn't already said it, now he's practically screaming to be boned in the ass. (nice guitar work though)
JLH's body is hot! She looks like a woman now, as opposed to an 11 year old girl...but hey, if that's what you guys are into, you do know it's against the law, right?
goddam "chubby Kelly Clarkson" post...if you leave them alone, they'll just chew their cud all day, but nooooooo, we had to rile them up, and now they're stampeding all over the site.
you only think john mayer 'is a pretty cool guy' becaus eyou saw him on chapelle show. he didnt do anything on the chapelle show by the way except pretend to play guitar. basically what im saying is he sucks.
WOW - I think you guys are the first people that I've ever heard (or seen) say that Jessica SImpson is unattractive. I've never met anyone who hasn't at least thought she was pretty. I admit she's kind of dumb, and I don't like to hear her speak, but I have to give credit where credit's due as far as looks go. And I saw John Mayer play live, he's actually very good.
Wow! I think you guys are the first people I've heard (or seen) say that Jessica Simpson is unattractive. I mean, I personally think she's pretty unintelligent and she annoys me when she speaks, but I have to at least admit that she's pretty. And I've seen John Mayer perform live, he's actually really good.
Maybe they like e/o. Anytime someone's happy it's a good thing.
Jessica Simpson, another fat, ugly, plastic, bloated, ego-tripping shit-head, this one on roller skates. How cute. Please, Jess, please, for all of us (and you better believe there are millions and millions of us out here), just fucking drop dead - bitch.
Ok, let's not forget that one of John Mayer's last conquests was none other than the magnificent Heidi Klum.
so, after that Heidi goes to scary craterface, and John goes to shemale lobotomy. they must have scratched each other's retinas during a moment of passion.
Judging from all these posts, I guess Wonderland just added a big, popular new attraction out back, one with wide appeal. So many people seem to like it big, word is spreading. Oh well, there's more to Love.
Anonymous said... so they hooked up and now her throat is too damaged to speak or sing. mr mayer must have quite a weiner...
August 30, 2006 10:18 PM
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
First comment to ever make me laugh out loud. Good thing she doesn't have a cold sore too. Then we'd be writing about John Mayer's herpes-ridden penis.
i've lol'd so much in this thread that i don't know if i can acknowledge all the timestamps. holy crap. 11:34, 11:38, 12:14, 12:29, 12:44. 2:16, etc and so on.
Meyer wrote that benign bullshit song?! I hate that tripe! Jessica's lips make me want to punch her in the face, does anyone else fell the same way too?
Well, the big trouble with Jessica isn't the bod... not to skinny, not too anorexic, she's got all the booty someone could want from a blonde hottie. We've only to cross our fingers, and, for the sake of the good music, hope that her sponsorized muteness will last. Even a mute can sell her looks, do her boyfriend or whore herself to parties with hiltonian dresses. Only, music will be safe.
It's the event of a lifetime for Jessie. Finally relieved of the burden of a squeeky, awfully bad and off-sync voice she could utterly rediscover her career, from a sexy lifesized annoying noisy dumb body to a "stilish" mute silently parading around in hiltonian dresses smiling, making "cute faces", holding signs like a female Wil E. Coyote and dating rich men with her newfound silent mannequin charm. Jessica Simpson new flavour, Ariel's breeze: "No chatty, no talky, no singy, more facey, more smily, more signy, more booty, more booty. Limited offer, the perfect blonde for a limited time. 'cause with a bod like that, you really didn't need a voice". If only could last longer...
If Jennifer Love Hewitt's hips look big, then 95% of women around the world must look like planets to you. Just because she has an hour glass figure doesn't make her "huge". Marilyn Monroe had "huge" hips, too...
Yeah, I actually saw this (John/Jessica thing) for myself the other night at the Lotus Child show in New York the other week. I saw John at the merchandise booth buying a girl-size Lotus Child shirt for her. She looked really hot in it, I will admit.
ya i think nick loved her. think john mayer is fat. jessica is a ditz but i mean you cant blame her for being such a "slut" she didnt have sex until she was like freaking 22 its like she only 21 now or something. not 28. and yes jennifer has always been thick. i dont like her though she reminds me of the "nice" girl that everyone liked but wasnt realyl nice. and plus she had her fair of bfs. carson, john, some others the list goes on. she's been around honestly.
78 Comments:
She got a sponsor for her freaking sign? Just how much can one person whore themselves out?
By sean, on 10:58 AM
Jessica is so fucking ugly I can't stand looking at her hook nose and giant chin. She looks like a fucking drag queen. Thank God those JLH pics were there to make my dick feel better.
By Anonymous, on 11:11 AM
Jessica's Simpson's cd is complete shit, and she looks manly, etc....it's all been said (although, I still prefer her to Ashlee anyday)
But what's I'm really wondering about is Jennifer Love Hewitt's hips...I mean, I knew the girl was pear-shaped, and she even admits to it in magazines....but DAMN! they look enormous! Maybe she's trying to revive her career with some pregnancy rumours.
By Anonymous, on 11:12 AM
JLH is getting more full figure as she ages. Her cans ( o ) ( o ) are also getting more full. Nice. As far as "vagina-begging", I've known a few guys like this, but never been one.
By Anonymous, on 11:13 AM
In the fourth pic it looks like Ken Paves (Jessicas professional hair-stylist/scrotum sucker) is in the background. YOu know the only reason he's even associated with her is because she really is a tranny in disguise.
By Anonymous, on 11:15 AM
lets get the cans right
( o ) ( o ) Thats better
By Anonymous, on 11:15 AM
I was going to say she's probably also lost her mind, but it's doubtful she had one to begin with.
Fish lips!
By Anonymous, on 11:15 AM
Jessica lost her voice? Alriiiight!
Now, if we can have World Peace and a stop to 3rd World hunger I can kick that sleeping genie off my damn couch.
By joejoe, on 11:18 AM
i think the jessica pics are a quiz. let's see...
1. duck
2. donkey
3. trout
4. baboon
5. ostrich
By Anonymous, on 11:32 AM
I can't stand this bitch. She constantly wears the expression of a 4 year-old who's dropped her ice cream cone on the ground.
By Anonymous, on 11:34 AM
JLH wobbles but she doesn't fall down
By Anonymous, on 11:35 AM
his new song is Your Body is a Wonderland But I Don't Like the New Saddlebag Ride
By Anonymous, on 11:38 AM
I <3 the chick on the left in picture 5. Now she's HOT!
By Anonymous, on 11:39 AM
JLH is still very lovely. Her face is so diminutive and pixie-like that it makes the rest of her body look even larger.
As for Chestica, someone must have told her that woman with large breasts who "pout" are considered sexy because she sure over-works this look ad nauseaum.
By Anonymous, on 11:47 AM
jennifer looks great, she just has more of an hourglass figure now. well maybe an hour and a half
By Anonymous, on 11:49 AM
say what you will about Mayer's songs, he is one of the most amazing guitar players of the last 10 years..I don't get this match-up at all
By Anonymous, on 11:53 AM
I've said this before but I believe is bears repeating.
Jessica looks a lot like Patrick Swayze in "To Wong Foo Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar".
By Anonymous, on 11:54 AM
John Mayer tried to establish himself as a "thinking woman's'" musican before he got so dreadfully commerical, but the truth is in the poon tang.
Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jessica Simpson have to be some of the most vacuous women in show business. What a tard.
By Anonymous, on 11:58 AM
OK, I agree John Mayer has an amazing talent and although it has been somewhat misguided, he has created some great music. His acoustic guitar solo in "Neon" is jaw dropping, but he must be someone who cannot bear to have an intellectual conversion in his private life because his choice in women only spells out.. B-O-O-B-S!
By Anonymous, on 12:03 PM
"the chick on the left in picture 5. Now she's HOT!" Sure, if your looking for a woman with a chin like Jay Leno & a pickle for a nose.
By Anonymous, on 12:04 PM
JLH is still very lovely. Her face is so diminutive and pixie-like that it makes the rest of her body look even larger.
that's true. but a little scary, too - given how big her ass looks now, she must have had a recent encounter with a headshrinking tribe.
By Anonymous, on 12:07 PM
John Mayer is NOT looking so hot these days. He looks like a heavy set version of JLo's skeletor husband in the face.
By Anonymous, on 12:12 PM
you just know the original quote was "she's cameltoeing back into the dating world" and the editor changed it
By Anonymous, on 12:14 PM
i think he's attracted to her intelligence
By Anonymous, on 12:15 PM
i guess Wilmer injected something fatty into her ass
By Anonymous, on 12:16 PM
Jessica's outfit looks like a 1920's swimsuit...
How can they put her through hours of hair and make-up and then say "Yeah honey, that looks great!" When she walks out in an outfit like this?
By katdug, on 12:24 PM
my has jennifer gotten fat
anywho....john mayer makes some really good music. that nerd has talent...so why the fuck is he with jessica simpsons???
By prettyboy, on 12:26 PM
maybe jessica wouldnt have lost her voice if daddy's dick didnt keep slamming into her vocal cords
By Anonymous, on 12:29 PM
Too bad someone didn't switch her sign to "I'm a big joke" when she wasn't looking.
By Vern, on 12:44 PM
Since Jessica has her blowjob face on in picture number 2, I can only assume Papa Joe Simpson must have just walked into the room.
"Now Jessi, you know I told you we don't do that in public, that's our special secret we only play at home with your sister"
See picture number 3 for her reaction to his statement.
By Anonymous, on 12:48 PM
He wrote "Your Body is a Wonderland" long before ever meeting JLH. Check you facts genius.
By Anonymous, on 12:55 PM
I'd tap it. All of it. Except for John Mayer.
By CK1, on 1:01 PM
This is not okay. She's gone too far.
And what's this shit about her 'tiptoeing back into the dating word' because from what I've heard she's fucked everyone from Dane Cook to Bam. So... whatever.
By Anonymous, on 1:26 PM
Ok, let's not forget that one of John Mayer's last conquests was none other than the magnificent Heidi Klum.
But other than that, wtf is he thinking?
dating Jessica Simpson=horrible career move
screwing Jessica Simpson once=pretty smart career move
I'm totally starting a riot if he brings her home to his mom and dad in Fairfield.
By Anonymous, on 1:26 PM
Mayer looks like that guy with the nasally laugh who always wants to give you massages and touches himself inappropriately in the back of the movie theater.
Hewitt actually looks pretty damn hot. She's still a vapid whore, but her body is bangin with that extra 10 pounds on it.
By Anonymous, on 1:33 PM
jessica's getting a bit chunky...i thought she said she lost weight for her CD launch.
By Anonymous, on 1:46 PM
What an idiot! Her so called Laryngitis is just a stupid publicity stunt, that will most likely back fire on their stupid arse.
By Anonymous, on 1:54 PM
Lost her voice? Didn't know she had one.
JLH is on boyfriend #10006, her vagina is a wonderland.
By Anonymous, on 1:57 PM
Those damn carp lips are disgusting. how many more ugly faces can Jessica make? It doesn't get much worse than this.
By Anonymous, on 2:00 PM
I think Jennifer Love looks great, and normally she is way overrated. it would help if she wore a better bra so her breasts balanced out her hips some.
John Mayer needs to cut his sodium intake way back.
August 30, 2006 11:32 AM
actually, all the answers to the animal quiz are "jackass"
By Anonymous, on 2:02 PM
I'd tap it. All of it. ESPECIALLY John Mayer. If his lyrics hadn't already said it, now he's practically screaming to be boned in the ass. (nice guitar work though)
By Anonymous, on 2:03 PM
JLH's body is hot! She looks like a woman now, as opposed to an 11 year old girl...but hey, if that's what you guys are into, you do know it's against the law, right?
By Anonymous, on 2:04 PM
goddam "chubby Kelly Clarkson" post...if you leave them alone, they'll just chew their cud all day, but nooooooo, we had to rile them up, and now they're stampeding all over the site.
By Anonymous, on 2:16 PM
yeah! "you guys" and your fixation with 11-year-old girl bodies! you bastards!
unlike women, who think the best bodies (of the decade) look something like, say, Twiggy or Kate Moss...
By Anonymous, on 2:31 PM
I guess she was trying to be cute with the I lost my voice sign but the only thing I could think of was THANK GOD
By Trion, on 2:47 PM
john mayer is a big greasy pasty boring blob. i don't get him at all. no kind of guitar playing can make up for that mess.
By Anonymous, on 2:59 PM
you only think john mayer 'is a pretty cool guy' becaus eyou saw him on chapelle show. he didnt do anything on the chapelle show by the way except pretend to play guitar. basically what im saying is he sucks.
By Anonymous, on 3:16 PM
John Mayer is begining to look like Pete Doherty.
By Anonymous, on 4:18 PM
why is she holding a YAHOO sign again!? i'm clueless. i hope she lost her voice FOR GOOD. somebody kill me before i have to listen to her whiny voice.
By m, on 4:55 PM
WOW - I think you guys are the first people that I've ever heard (or seen) say that Jessica SImpson is unattractive. I've never met anyone who hasn't at least thought she was pretty. I admit she's kind of dumb, and I don't like to hear her speak, but I have to give credit where credit's due as far as looks go. And I saw John Mayer play live, he's actually very good.
By Anonymous, on 6:34 PM
Wow! I think you guys are the first people I've heard (or seen) say that Jessica Simpson is unattractive. I mean, I personally think she's pretty unintelligent and she annoys me when she speaks, but I have to at least admit that she's pretty. And I've seen John Mayer perform live, he's actually really good.
Maybe they like e/o. Anytime someone's happy it's a good thing.
By Anonymous, on 6:37 PM
Jessica's pic #2 looks like Jamie Foxx's "Wanda" character from In Living Color "I'll rock your world"
By Anonymous, on 6:54 PM
Jessica Simpson, another fat, ugly, plastic, bloated, ego-tripping shit-head, this one on roller skates. How cute. Please, Jess, please, for all of us (and you better believe there are millions and millions of us out here), just fucking drop dead - bitch.
By Anonymous, on 6:56 PM
Picture JLH in five years. Boom, boom.
That's all for now from The Hollywood Insider
By The Hollywood Insider, on 7:22 PM
I think JLH looks great. I'm so sick of these Blohan looking anorexics.
John's only with Jessica for the booty, so I really don't care.
By Anonymous, on 8:15 PM
Well if Jim Carrey can hook up with Jenna (ex-porn star) McCarthy then anything is possible.
By Anonymous, on 8:24 PM
I'm so sick of these Blohan looking anorexics
whoops - she's recovered, so we're calling her fat now.
By Anonymous, on 8:52 PM
Ok, let's not forget that one of John Mayer's last conquests was none other than the magnificent Heidi Klum.
so, after that Heidi goes to scary craterface, and John goes to shemale lobotomy. they must have scratched each other's retinas during a moment of passion.
By Anonymous, on 9:20 PM
at this rate Mayer's next girlfriend will be that extraterrestrial behind JLH in pic 4
By Anonymous, on 10:04 PM
Jessica Simpson's lips look like Paris Hilton's vagina.
By Anonymous, on 10:05 PM
so they hooked up and now her throat is too damaged to speak or sing. mr mayer must have quite a weiner...
By Anonymous, on 10:18 PM
JLH has gotten a little chunky yes, but she's still quite doable... Wha? What did I just say?
By Anonymous, on 11:45 PM
Judging from all these posts, I guess Wonderland just added a big, popular new attraction out back, one with wide appeal. So many people seem to like it big, word is spreading. Oh well, there's more to Love.
That's all for now from The Hollywood Insider.
By The Hollywood Insider, on 12:04 AM
Anonymous said...
so they hooked up and now her throat is too damaged to speak or sing. mr mayer must have quite a weiner...
August 30, 2006 10:18 PM
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
First comment to ever make me laugh out loud. Good thing she doesn't have a cold sore too. Then we'd be writing about John Mayer's herpes-ridden penis.
By Anonymous, on 4:21 AM
That's all for now from The Hollywood Insider.
Promise?
By Anonymous, on 4:49 AM
i've lol'd so much in this thread that i don't know if i can acknowledge all the timestamps. holy crap. 11:34, 11:38, 12:14, 12:29, 12:44. 2:16, etc and so on.
By S., on 9:53 AM
ROFL @ the weiner comment.
In her honor, Mayer is going to change the title of "Your Body Is A Wonderland" to "Your Face Is Just Like A Man's." (okay, so sing it).
By Piquebu, on 10:41 AM
Meyer wrote that benign bullshit song?! I hate that tripe! Jessica's lips make me want to punch her in the face, does anyone else fell the same way too?
By Anonymous, on 1:15 PM
Her other sign says, "I lost my dignity."
By Anonymous, on 2:05 PM
12:14 "cameltoeing back into the dating world" BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
ROF, L -- M -- EFFING -- AAAAA - OOOOOO
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
By Massengill, on 4:58 PM
Female douchebag. she would make a good couple with the guys on www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com
By Massengill, on 5:02 PM
Well, the big trouble with Jessica isn't the bod... not to skinny, not too anorexic, she's got all the booty someone could want from a blonde hottie.
We've only to cross our fingers, and, for the sake of the good music, hope that her sponsorized muteness will last. Even a mute can sell her looks, do her boyfriend or whore herself to parties with hiltonian dresses. Only, music will be safe.
By Anonymous, on 2:50 AM
It's the event of a lifetime for Jessie. Finally relieved of the burden of a squeeky, awfully bad and off-sync voice she could utterly rediscover her career, from a sexy lifesized annoying noisy dumb body to a "stilish" mute silently parading around in hiltonian dresses smiling, making "cute faces", holding signs like a female Wil E. Coyote and dating rich men with her newfound silent mannequin charm.
Jessica Simpson new flavour, Ariel's breeze: "No chatty, no talky, no singy, more facey, more smily, more signy, more booty, more booty. Limited offer, the perfect blonde for a limited time. 'cause with a bod like that, you really didn't need a voice". If only could last longer...
By Anonymous, on 4:06 AM
If Jennifer Love Hewitt's hips look big, then 95% of women around the world must look like planets to you. Just because she has an hour glass figure doesn't make her "huge". Marilyn Monroe had "huge" hips, too...
By Anonymous, on 10:06 PM
Yeah, I actually saw this (John/Jessica thing) for myself the other night at the Lotus Child show in New York the other week. I saw John at the merchandise booth buying a girl-size Lotus Child shirt for her. She looked really hot in it, I will admit.
By Mozart Snob Kid, on 4:37 PM
Leaving Nick Lachey was the biggest mistake of her life. He loved her. Now look at who shes dating. Pathetic...
By Anonymous, on 4:00 PM
ya i think nick loved her. think john mayer is fat. jessica is a ditz but i mean you cant blame her for being such a "slut" she didnt have sex until she was like freaking 22 its like she only 21 now or something. not 28. and yes jennifer has always been thick. i dont like her though she reminds me of the "nice" girl that everyone liked but wasnt realyl nice. and plus she had her fair of bfs. carson, john, some others the list goes on. she's been around honestly.
By Anonymous, on 10:03 PM
I thought John was better than this...
By Anonymous, on 2:29 PM
Post a Comment
<< Continue Reading IDontLikeYouInThatWay.com