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Papa Joe Simpson is an Excellent Driver

TMZ is reporting that Joe Simpson was in a little embarrassing accident Saturday night while leaving the grand opening of his daughter's BFF's salon:

Dad/manager Joe Simpson was out cruising the town when his evening came to a sudden halt ... by a railing! Joe was about to drive off in his Ferrari in Beverly Hills Saturday night after leaving Ken Paves' salon when he ran into the railing from a staircase. He looked over his shoulder in disbelief and embarrassment. Instead of stopping to look at the damage (like any proud man), he drove away before anyone else noticed."

Maybe it's because a member of his family is on here every day or because he's such a creepy bastard, but that "God is My Co-Pilot" bumper sticker hasn't fooled anyone for quite a while.

Jessica and Eva Longoria at the grand opening:

36 Comments:

Ok, Jessica has a Sandra Bernhard(sp?) look going on in these pics. Eeeyuuch.

By Vern, on 9:22 AM
He's totally checking out Ashlee's rack in that picture../barf/

Every time I hear that phrase "Papa Joe" it makes me want to sit in the corner and rock back and forth. He is one creepy father, that's for damn sure.

I can see the headlines now:
"Due out in 2010, "Daddy Loves Me", the collaboration between the Simpson sisters that tells their harrowing tale of having a pimp for a father, and the real reason he dubbed himself 'Papa Joe'".

By Anonymous, on 9:52 AM
Can this family NOT go a day without providing some sort of fodder for celebrity bloggers??
One would almost think it's a calculated effort to keep their names in the press, eh?

Ok, maybe I'm being a bit too sarcastic. ;)

No doubt Poppa Jhoe is an investor in the salon and Ken has chronic lockjaw.

By joejoe, on 10:08 AM
I wonder which sibling was giving him road head this time?

By Anonymous, on 10:10 AM
so that's what they mean by "taking it in his man-pussy" (pic 3)

By Anonymous, on 10:36 AM
Oh, Jessica...Rockin' the camel toe again, I see (not to mention some serious gut flab). Those poor little jeans missed their retirement party. Now respect their wishes and bury them in the Things That Cannot Be Revived Memorial Park, between your Daisy Dukes and your career.

By Janet Jackson's pants, on 10:37 AM
How do they manage to make Eva Longoria look pretty on Desperate Housewives when she's so ugly in real life?

By Anonymous, on 10:43 AM
kelly says ken paves looks pretty tender, but you'd have to use a rapid boil and lots of red wine to render the hiv

By Anonymous, on 10:50 AM
Whoa, check out Jessica's gunt. Her jeans completely bulge out at a 45 degree angle over her Fat Upper Pussy Area.

Jess, time to switch to the oil-free Chicken Of The Sea

By Anonymous, on 11:02 AM
his other bumper sticker says, "I brake for DD's...."

By parissucksliterally, on 11:04 AM
stand still gals... i'm still assembling the sniper rifle...

By Anonymous, on 11:51 AM
maybe papajoe is paris' father too. similar driving skills.

By Anonymous, on 11:51 AM
yeah, he's definitely checking out ashlee's boobs... i mean, those are amazing boobs, but dude, yuck

By Anonymous, on 11:52 AM
JE - SUS! Talk about squeezing the animal! Buy jeans that fit for Chrissake. Oh and yeah, Big Papa's totally checking Ash's fun bags. Another shudder.

By Hottie Hottie, on 11:57 AM
Damn, wtf happened to jessica? She used to be fine as fuck.

By Anonymous, on 12:14 PM
what kind of father starts oogling his daughters breasts????

i think he fucked his children

By prettyboy, on 12:17 PM
One should never attempt to drive when receiving a blowjob from ones daughter(s).

By Anonymous, on 1:01 PM
Hey Guntica: Danii Minogue called. She wants her lower abdomen back.

By Anonymous, on 1:17 PM
Why are they mimicking typical flamer gestures in the last pic? You're women, right?

By clint, on 2:00 PM
You're women, right?

Don't be so sure.

By Anonymous, on 2:24 PM
Emmmm...Jessica Simpson & Eva Longoria sandwich....emmmmmmmmmm

By Anonymous, on 3:28 PM
last picture - jessica - camel toe...

By Anonymous, on 3:41 PM
I like how pimp joe drives a Ferrari.

Eva Schlongoria has jumped the shark. Too many "facials" from Tony. I think he is gettin ready to DTB.

By Anonymous, on 4:26 PM
Guys, he's just making sure his cum stain wasn't on her dress he wasn't staring at her rack.

By Brandy, on 4:27 PM
WTF is the blond guy in the photos with JS every time?

By Anonymous, on 4:42 PM
FUGLY FUGLY FUGLY FUGLY FUGLY FUGLY FUGLY. I RATHER BE HELD UP IN A AMISH SCHOOL HOUSE THEN FUCK THIS SKANK!

By Anonymous, on 6:56 PM
Papa Joe is looking down Asslee's shirt. NASTY PERV!!!

By Anonymous, on 7:40 PM
Does anyone have worse taste in shoes than this broad?

By Anonymous, on 7:46 PM
looks like eva shaved her, uh, "sun-damaged skin" for these pics

By Anonymous, on 8:54 AM
he was probably drunk

By whatevs, on 10:32 AM
"Jessica and Eva Longoria at the grand opening" would make sense if ken paves was bending over

By Anonymous, on 11:07 AM
Jessica looks like a cocker spaniel, how darling...PUKE! Papa Joe was all hopped up on champagne and vicodin again I see!

By Anonymous, on 11:08 AM
every straight guy here lies on these simpson posts. if your daughters were as hot as these two you'd be laying the wood to them every night, just like papa joe. you just got half-chubbers, didn't you? perverts.

By Anonymous, on 12:19 PM
Ken Peves looks best of the bunch.

By Anonymous, on 2:35 PM
I can't wait for the Simpson clan sex tape to come out. Imagine Joe Simpson doing Jessica and Ashley both at the same time. Now that's a sex tape I want to watch.

By Anonymous, on 7:30 PM
When stupid people will finally stop buying what ever Fug they are selling, then money will get real tight and the only opportunity left will be for the Pimp Dad to release the porno tape he has while doing both the hos. Real fuged up family!

By Anonymous, on 5:50 PM