Kim Katchadisease is probably finger fucking herself into obvilion all over these pictures. That thing must look like a power-shower to her nasty self.
This guy probably thought this would be really cool. He was wrong.
Some people just by sports cars to make up for what they are lacking. This guy puts on a fake dick. dude if it's that bad just get some implants or make yourself a woman. No reason to scare the virgins and make them think all dicks look that fucked up.
Ok so......he's trying to be risque by lying on a bed with a gigantic prosthetic penis resting on his lap and YET he is wearing a pair of nude undies underneath that? The LEAST he could have done was be bottomless underneath that Godzilla-Dick.
I just laughed. Really loudly. By myself. That's just ridiculous! I'm assuming he knows it's ridiculous. He knows that, right? I mean...that shit's just goofy.
why did he have to add giant - um - "devil" balls to match? i mean, just 'cause a guy has an enormous dick, it doesn't mean he's gotta have twin grapefruit balls to match, you know?
Why are they publicizing that turd Eli Roth? Every promotional thing I see for this movie has his silly face on it. If they want guys to see this movie (and let's face it, horror movie = male audience), stop showing me Eli Roth's big fake penis and show me Bijou Phillips and Jordan Ladd looking sexy. Nobody is going to say, "I can't wait to see Hostel 2 because Eli Roth has a big dick!"
Although, I can't think of a reason we should be aware of Eli Roth, I do think we can find a reason for this pictorial in his relationship with Chloe (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0158544/), who has been known to accomodate "double fisting" and that would make anyone feel their penis is small.
Doesn't even look like Eli....looks like Seth Green, which makes it even creepier, since I've never EVER wanted to see Seth naked, nor a guy who resembles Seth in any way. Naked.
Someone made a comment about Eli wants to be black? There are white guys with big cocks too you know! Johnny Wad Holmes was what, 18 inches long and 3 inches wide!!! I would have loved to ride that!
56 Comments:
Leave Your CommentI'd hit it.
By Jake Gyllenhaal, on June 5, 2007 11:14:05
yikes. The tip looks infected.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 11:15:54
Jeez Todd, just go run away with Jake G and get it over with already.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 11:18:32
What a douche.
Kim Katchadisease is probably finger fucking herself into obvilion all over these pictures. That thing must look like a power-shower to her nasty self.
This guy probably thought this would be really cool. He was wrong.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 11:19:50
OH MY GOD. THAT'S ALL I CAN FIND TO SAY.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 11:43:40
Uncircumsized jew? F%^&ing Hollywood for sure!
By Gary Sheffield, on June 5, 2007 11:44:55
GROSS! How he ever thought that was attractive, I'll never know. That is just WAY TOO MUCH. He needs a dick reduction, STAT!
By Jessica, on June 5, 2007 12:03:07
Wow. Every woman he's with will be SO disappointed after this.
I mean, not that every woman wants a 2-footer, just that whatever he has will be small compared to the pix. Good work, Eli!
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 12:03:11
he must have a really tiny penis
By prettyboy, on June 5, 2007 12:03:28
Some people just by sports cars to make up for what they are lacking. This guy puts on a fake dick. dude if it's that bad just get some implants or make yourself a woman. No reason to scare the virgins and make them think all dicks look that fucked up.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 12:03:59
Almost as large as mine.
By Dick Cheney, on June 5, 2007 12:06:39
hey anon 14:19:50..
i doubt kim would care.. his "stuff" is a bit pale for her taste.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 12:07:45
Thanks GOd for these funny comments because I was soooo wishing I hadn't clicked on that!
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 12:12:38
Uh, hate to tell you but that's not fake . . . And Jake is not gay. But his boyfriend is. . .
By Gossip Monger, on June 5, 2007 12:13:36
I took one up the gazoo that was about that big. I couldn't walk on the set for a week.
By Shia LeBeouf, on June 5, 2007 12:32:30
Finally, a match for Lohan's "Fire crotch."
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 12:33:31
Ok so......he's trying to be risque by lying on a bed with a gigantic prosthetic penis resting on his lap and YET he is wearing a pair of nude undies underneath that? The LEAST he could have done was be bottomless underneath that Godzilla-Dick.
OH HE'S SO SHY HOW CUTE.
:roll:
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 12:47:24
Ha ha ha! Jake Gyllenhaal's a fag!
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 12:53:44
i think i just turned lesbian
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 12:54:14
I just laughed. Really loudly. By myself. That's just ridiculous! I'm assuming he knows it's ridiculous. He knows that, right? I mean...that shit's just goofy.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 13:03:44
Photoshop is fun.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 13:04:04
hollywood has gone to shit
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 13:14:11
Another suburban Jewish kid wishing he were black. Oy vey.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 13:15:15
Am I the only one who found the "This image has been scaled down" message funny in this context?
By harry, on June 5, 2007 13:23:08
At least they could have circumcised the thing as he's Jewish.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 13:30:25
I wonder if he's ever sat down real fast and poked himself. Ouch.
By eric chase, on June 5, 2007 13:58:21
I think that prosthetic dick would go much better with Cisco Adler's real balls.
By Penis Episiotomy, on June 5, 2007 14:09:47
ew
why did he have to add giant - um - "devil" balls to match? i mean, just 'cause a guy has an enormous dick, it doesn't mean he's gotta have twin grapefruit balls to match, you know?
By amanda, on June 5, 2007 15:18:20
It would never fit in me, but I am turned on a little. :-)
By anonymous girl, on June 5, 2007 15:19:59
it is a disease. it is called
eli - phantiasis.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 15:35:56
Why are they publicizing that turd Eli Roth? Every promotional thing I see for this movie has his silly face on it. If they want guys to see this movie (and let's face it, horror movie = male audience), stop showing me Eli Roth's big fake penis and show me Bijou Phillips and Jordan Ladd looking sexy. Nobody is going to say, "I can't wait to see Hostel 2 because Eli Roth has a big dick!"
By TheBig28, on June 5, 2007 15:35:57
OK thats not attractive...and WHAT. THE. FUCK?!?!
By Mr. President, on June 5, 2007 15:37:39
eeeeewwwwwwww...that's too big.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 15:41:22
that picture is on Paris Hilton walls in jail she kisses it goodnight everytime she hears LIGHTS OUT BITCH
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 16:16:56
What's the big deal? That's the typical size of an uncircumcised penis.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 16:43:06
damn man im 10 inches and i thought i was big i guess i was wrong
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 16:45:29
I bet ya he got the photographer to take a pic of him bending over and putting it into his mouth.
Eww sitting on a mattress with no sheets..
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 17:41:36
Shit that's nothing: You should see Fergie's...
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 17:54:12
Although, I can't think of a reason we should be aware of Eli Roth, I do think we can find a reason for this pictorial in his relationship with Chloe (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0158544/), who has been known to accomodate "double fisting" and that would make anyone feel their penis is small.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 18:12:09
I've seen bigger.
By Paris Hilton, on June 5, 2007 21:18:15
"Now Butters, open your mouth and close your eyes and I will give you a big surprise."
"You're not going to put something icky in my mouth are you Cartman?"
"No, I swear on my mother's grave that I won't put anything icky in your mouth."
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 21:51:24
I can't stand this asshole.
By anonymous, on June 5, 2007 23:39:29
Hell, at least Hohan/Shitney/Paris showed their REAL coochies...man up, dude.
By anonymous, on June 6, 2007 02:53:35
I like it, I'm totally going to see Hostel II. LOL
By BloodyWhore, on June 6, 2007 06:36:12
I don't understand. How does a big fake dick hide the fact he has no talent and makes shitty movies? Is it supposed to distract me from that fact ...
By anonymous, on June 6, 2007 09:52:19
uncut dicks are nasty
By anonymous, on June 6, 2007 10:54:50
Doesn't even look like Eli....looks like Seth Green, which makes it even creepier, since I've never EVER wanted to see Seth naked, nor a guy who resembles Seth in any way. Naked.
By Amanda, on June 6, 2007 11:10:23
attention seeking crappy director that uses shocks to sell, why don't you torture some more amercians in your films again - you sicko!!
By hayden, on June 6, 2007 11:57:27
looks like snuffleupagus' nose.
By anonymous, on June 6, 2007 15:38:11
yikes! thats nasty. big is good, but not like this infected thing. eli, just show us the real you.
By anonymous, on June 6, 2007 19:27:21
yeah its creepy looking, but that come hither stare he's giving me under all that eyeliner is gettin' me all hot n' bothered.
By hystericalredhead, on June 6, 2007 21:23:56
Someone made a comment about Eli wants to be black? There are white guys with big cocks too you know! Johnny Wad Holmes was what, 18 inches long and 3 inches wide!!! I would have loved to ride that!
By anonymous, on June 7, 2007 16:05:04
You gotta keep busting on Jake G. all the time? Give it a rest.
By Pier Angeli, on June 7, 2007 17:49:42
Ick.
By anonymous, on June 8, 2007 01:07:37
ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
By anonymous, on June 15, 2007 09:04:58
either he's wearing some lil briefs or his crotch area is strangely wrinkled. LOL what a wimp!
By anonymous, on July 27, 2007 10:40:24
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