You know, back when I was a beat cop in Milwaukee, there was this street musician. Fellow by the name of Cornelius Fonzarelli McGarnickle Goldstein Nguyen. Yes, he was blind in one eye, and yes, he lost his right arm in a tricycle accident, and yes, he lost his legs in a panda attack, and yes he lost his left arm in an Antarctic expedition, and yes, he was severely retarded...but I tell you, that Nguyen was the best fucking blues guitarist I've ever seen. And I'll never forget his final song, before he died aboard the space shuttle...it was titled "Religion is for Assholes". And, you know, it rings true, even today.
no one's mentioned that her Scientology contract stipulates she must always pose knock-kneed so that she doesn't appear to be a foot taller than her pygmy superstud husband.
She stands behind him a bit and then kinda leans into him so it appears they're the same height in public. How much practice did it take to perfect that pose? BTW Katie looks great. Have to give her that. He's an ugly crooked toothed bastard.
Normally i would feel sorry for a person in Katies situation, because they are obviously very impressionable, but with an attorney for a a father, she has no excuse. If she really lets tom and his cronies run her life, then she don't just look like an air head, she really is one.
Is it me, or does it always look like he's holding on to her like he's afraid she'll run away. That crazy fucker is latched onto her like grim death ...
It's really strange watching Katie with Tom and all this BS. She was young and pretty and kind of cool once. And now look what happened to her. What she did to herself by getting together with this maniac. Years from now, she'll sit back and think what life she could have had if she went a different direction. It's kind of sad... even though it's hard to feel sorry for her, since she did it all to herself.
Kate's never been really hot, never been a great actress...when Dawson's Creek dried up she probably saw this as an opportunity to make Tom look ungay and herself a little moulah..a la Kevin Federline, only with woman..stuff and not ghetto. Anyone else notic their 'movie' kiss there? The one where the lips are never on the lips but they tend to suck the upper or lower mouth area rather than actually..kiss?
It's Tom and Katie: Never Been Kissed!..coming to a crappy network lineup soon..
Galactar help ups..or Zulu..whatever the hell the scientology alien evil man's name is.
Scrappy Doo for all I care.
Tom and Katie, Britney and Kevin, Paris, Lindsay Lohan..
please lock yourselves into a cramped hotel room for a week..and let the winner emerge victorious.
Tom is GAY so I guess that means Katie is a lesbian like Nicole? Why does Scientology attract so many self hating gays? And why would her own father help her go along with a SHAM marriage with a control freak like Tom? I don't get it.
If I was God I would transport Mr Cruise into an old episode of "Land of the Giants" as a minor character and have it repeat over & over again until he worked out WTF the plot was supposed to be.
I wouldn't watch more than a few of the repeats, though. It'd get kind of boring after a while, like watching a retarded rat failing to navigate a maze. Besides, as God I'd have a bunch of stuff to take care of, so I guess I'd be pretty busy.
I hate Tom Cruise as much as the next person, but is there any basis to any of the accusations in this guys' book? Some of this ish seems pretty radical, and though Tom is a mouth-foaming fruitcake, I certainly WOULD put it past him.
Now I didn't take notes, but I do recall that the payout at divorce was far more than three mil a year. The prenup, which is on file in a CA court, likely, also included a much larger plum in the form of real estate and other properties.
I'm not sure why people assume that Katie's egg was melded with L Ron's sperm. No, no no. I'm also not sure why the obvious isn't really discussed out there, so I'll point it out. Tom Cruise found a suitable vessel who very much resembles himself, only, taller.
Human cloning IS NOT ILLEGAL in ITALY, which is where the curtain opened into this dramady called TOMKAT. My theory? Tom Cruise's sperm scrubbed and selected and test tube mated with L Ron's to create the XX female messiah of Scientology.
And we know Tom really just wants to be a girl himself.
None of which bodes well for this unremarkable girl Katie Holmes OR her demented family who went along with all of this instead of hiring a hit man to kill #2 in the Scientology sick chain of command.
Everyone has their price, and the Holmses were bought; she, the Lanvin clad Mother Mary, queen of the Mothership with L Ron and Surreal the child savior at the helm dashing through the galaxy of deceit and lies and brainwashing to claim the faithful believers in a "religion" of lies.
Oh, and unless Andrew Morton has suffered an acute attack of worms in the brain since he outed Diana's story, my feeling is that he is totally credible, the publisher likely took out extra insurance, because Tom Cruise has more money than God and is sure to sue. The leakings of the book's contents actually sound CONSERVATIVE to me, and like Diana's story, will be proven and beyond as the years move on.
And yes, the comment about Katie's screams..there's this thing called an e-meter (a glorified lie detector run amok.) Bzzzzzzt!
Vigilante's Anus lisped:"And I'll never forget his final song, before he died aboard the space shuttle...it was titled "Religion is for Assholes". And, you know, it rings true, even today."
Every time these two kiss it makes me cringe...it screams, "this is totally fucking fake and creepy" as loudly now as it did the first time I saw it. Eeesh.
TC would NEVER get married without a prenup! What a croc! We all knew he had one with Nicole....he's just a horror, who would sign something like that for him (or anyone)??!?!
You guys forgot...the girl in the pic on the side looking on , dressed in blue, lookslike katie Sicentology minder. She was pictured with a monder several times. You forgot that Katie gets $3 mill a year forevery year,but also tons of world class rich people's shopping .
Y'know, if you were raised by Scientologists and surrounded by Scientologists and taught that all that nonsense is truth, you'd believe it. Just like if you were raised by Christians and surrounded by Christians, you'd believe all *that* nonsense is truth. Neither story is all that more bizarre than the other...it's just that the established religions have the weight of time behind them.
Hahahahahaha I know that it hasn't been posted yet, but does anyone want to take a swipe at Nicole Ritchie for naming her daughter Harlow? She must think it's the posh French version of harlot. Seems oddly appropriate though. I can see that just like any other loving mother, Nicole Ritchie has her daughter's life planned out for her.
From the mouths of babes in a predominantly Jewish Middle School on L.I. N.Y.:
Q:"What's mommy doing to Daddy in the bedroom:?"
A:"Making jewelry!"
It's one thing to marry for money. It's another to sell your soul to the Devil (ala Ozzy Osbourne) to keep yourself in designer rags. She's a worse pig than he. Amazing how low some will stoop.
IN the wisdom and words of my ex husband regarding his second wife: "WELL, She's no Heather Locklear." And his ass was broke.
Stupid, vapid, brainless wonders of desperate women. Shame, shame, Ms. "Holmes." How little the world thinks of you.
For $3 mil a year, I'd make her sign a document that promises that not only will she give up that ass, but she'd beg in a convincing way that she really wanted it.
Britney is planning to kill herself and I have proof. She's modeling herself after Princess Diana in every way right down to how she plans to die. Like Diana, Brit became famous as a teen, married a man that didn't love her and lost custody of her kids to that man just like Diana. Brit is bipolar and suicidal like Diana, is having a public meltdown like Diana, is sleeping with two different muslims like Diana, is too intimate with the paparazzi like Diana and like Diana she calls them herself when she craves attention. Now Brit is driving around erratically in her Mercedes with her muslim BF and just bought a house in Malibu just like Diana did right before she died. Why do you think Brit has suddenly adopted a British accent? Britney is experiencing bipolar delusions of grandeur and is fashioning herself to die tragically like Diana because she thinks it will make everyone love her forever. This is a clear sign is she is a danger to herself and should be locked up. If she boards a plane to Paris you know how it will end....
Just shut the hell up. You don't know SHIT. You're a fucking teenage moron who knows nothing about Twitney or life in general. You don't have any inside info, so just shut the fuck up. Fucking teenagers.
61 Comments:
Leave Your CommentYou know, back when I was a beat cop in Milwaukee, there was this street musician. Fellow by the name of Cornelius Fonzarelli McGarnickle Goldstein Nguyen. Yes, he was blind in one eye, and yes, he lost his right arm in a tricycle accident, and yes, he lost his legs in a panda attack, and yes he lost his left arm in an Antarctic expedition, and yes, he was severely retarded...but I tell you, that Nguyen was the best fucking blues guitarist I've ever seen. And I'll never forget his final song, before he died aboard the space shuttle...it was titled "Religion is for Assholes". And, you know, it rings true, even today.
By Vigilante's Anus, on January 11, 2008 12:27:03
no one's mentioned that her Scientology contract stipulates she must always pose knock-kneed so that she doesn't appear to be a foot taller than her pygmy superstud husband.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 12:31:41
$3 million a year to be Tom's bitch. I'd say Katie got fucked.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 12:33:20
Somebody needs to knock that fucking smug look off of Tom's face. I can't stand that little prick.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 12:40:16
My mom said that I should stay away from him. Mom is always right
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 12:47:09
"and wow, Tom Cruise is a freaking lunatic"
You gone and done it now. They're coming for you Todd!
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 12:54:57
Scientology doesn't own me, they have a five year lease with another five year option. Dumbasses!
By Kate Holmes, on January 11, 2008 12:58:44
She stands behind him a bit and then kinda leans into him so it appears they're the same height in public. How much practice did it take to perfect that pose?
BTW Katie looks great. Have to give her that.
He's an ugly crooked toothed bastard.
By T, on January 11, 2008 13:01:48
So Katie is a $3 million a year whore. I'll bet her parents are proud.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 13:05:34
Normally i would feel sorry for a person in Katies situation, because they are obviously very impressionable, but with an attorney for a a father, she has no excuse. If she really lets tom and his cronies run her life, then she don't just look like an air head, she really is one.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 13:08:33
Is it me, or does it always look like he's holding on to her like he's afraid she'll run away. That crazy fucker is latched onto her like grim death ...
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 13:29:00
In that second picture, it looks like Katie is saying,
"Hello there, little boy. Are you lost? Do you need help finding your mommy?"
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 13:31:23
He always looks like this weird little baby/doll/robot in his pictures.
Maybe they killed the real Tom Cruise and replaced him with a robot?
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 13:40:34
careful...13:01 is a scientologist.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 14:00:27
Wow that is amazing and magical.
She is so brainwashed.
By Victoria, on January 11, 2008 14:00:41
Ha! Any one of you losers would suck TC's balls for 3 million a year!
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 14:01:13
I'd stay married to him for a year if I didn't have to have sex with him..
Hell even 6 months..I could live off 1.5 mill. and 6 months is nothing.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 14:02:30
It's really strange watching Katie with Tom and all this BS. She was young and pretty and kind of cool once. And now look what happened to her. What she did to herself by getting together with this maniac. Years from now, she'll sit back and think what life she could have had if she went a different direction. It's kind of sad... even though it's hard to feel sorry for her, since she did it all to herself.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 14:09:07
Kate's never been really hot, never been a great actress...when Dawson's Creek dried up she probably saw this as an opportunity to make Tom look ungay and herself a little moulah..a la Kevin Federline, only with woman..stuff and not ghetto.
Anyone else notic their 'movie' kiss there? The one where the lips are never on the lips but they tend to suck the upper or lower mouth area rather than actually..kiss?
It's Tom and Katie: Never Been Kissed!..coming to a crappy network lineup soon..
Galactar help ups..or Zulu..whatever the hell the scientology alien evil man's name is.
Scrappy Doo for all I care.
Tom and Katie, Britney and Kevin, Paris, Lindsay Lohan..
please lock yourselves into a cramped hotel room for a week..and let the winner emerge victorious.
By Yeah I Killed Kenny, on January 11, 2008 14:48:10
you know...Katie used to be a hot babe...now she's a Scientological Skank
By Gern Blansten, on January 11, 2008 14:58:19
Tom is GAY so I guess that means Katie is a lesbian like Nicole? Why does Scientology attract so many self hating gays? And why would her own father help her go along with a SHAM marriage with a control freak like Tom? I don't get it.
By The whole thing is WEIRD , on January 11, 2008 15:01:30
$3mill??
come on katie. you trapped yourself with this gay lunatic for $3mill a year?? wtf??
By Prettyboy, on January 11, 2008 15:11:33
I actually heard through the industry grapevine that Holmes is getting $8 Million for 5 years as Cruise's wife.
She could do a LOT worse.
By Joe Mahma, on January 11, 2008 15:26:22
What "Yeah I Killed Kenny" said.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 15:45:17
Tom Cruise is a moron and all the people who pay to see his movies are bigger morons; last movie I saw of his was Days of Thunder!!
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 15:59:56
It's sooo cute when couples share hair dye.
And economical!
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 16:13:47
She's only doing what many other women have done: marrying for money and security.
We just don't hear so much about those other women.
"If you marry for money, you earn every penny."
By whom was that said?, on January 11, 2008 16:20:56
*sigh*
I wish I was friends with a blues guitarist...
The only person I get to talk to is some asshole with bad breath.
By Vigilante's Other Anus, on January 11, 2008 16:21:51
If I was God I would transport Mr Cruise into an old episode of "Land of the Giants" as a minor character and have it repeat over & over again until he worked out WTF the plot was supposed to be.
I wouldn't watch more than a few of the repeats, though. It'd get kind of boring after a while, like watching a retarded rat failing to navigate a maze. Besides, as God I'd have a bunch of stuff to take care of, so I guess I'd be pretty busy.
By eddy, on January 11, 2008 18:02:31
Damn, anytime there is a camera even close to these two they automatically get into a liplock. They make my uterus hurt.
By Nicole Kidman, on January 11, 2008 18:25:30
That is not a real kiss, he is kissing her chin.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 20:11:27
#1 Scientology is not a religion it's a cult dumbass
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 20:16:56
That's to silence her screaming ...
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 20:18:21
I hate Tom Cruise as much as the next person, but is there any basis to any of the accusations in this guys' book? Some of this ish seems pretty radical, and though Tom is a mouth-foaming fruitcake, I certainly WOULD put it past him.
By anonymous, on January 11, 2008 21:07:30
Now I didn't take notes, but I do recall that the payout at divorce was far more than three mil a year. The prenup, which is on file in a CA court, likely, also included a much larger plum in the form of real estate and other properties.
I'm not sure why people assume that Katie's egg was melded with L Ron's sperm. No, no no. I'm also not sure why the obvious isn't really discussed out there, so I'll point it out. Tom Cruise found a suitable vessel who very much resembles himself, only, taller.
Human cloning IS NOT ILLEGAL in ITALY, which is where the curtain opened into this dramady called TOMKAT. My theory? Tom Cruise's sperm scrubbed and selected and test tube mated with L Ron's to create the XX female messiah of Scientology.
And we know Tom really just wants to be a girl himself.
None of which bodes well for this unremarkable girl Katie Holmes OR her demented family who went along with all of this instead of hiring a hit man to kill #2 in the Scientology sick chain of command.
Everyone has their price, and the Holmses were bought; she, the Lanvin clad Mother Mary, queen of the Mothership with L Ron and Surreal the child savior at the helm dashing through the galaxy of deceit and lies and brainwashing to claim the faithful believers in a "religion" of lies.
Oh, and unless Andrew Morton has suffered an acute attack of worms in the brain since he outed Diana's story, my feeling is that he is totally credible, the publisher likely took out extra insurance, because Tom Cruise has more money than God and is sure to sue. The leakings of the book's contents actually sound CONSERVATIVE to me, and like Diana's story, will be proven and beyond as the years move on.
And yes, the comment about Katie's screams..there's this thing called an e-meter (a glorified lie detector run amok.) Bzzzzzzt!
By SAM, on January 11, 2008 21:41:23
Tom is a bipolar if I ever saw one. It's interesting how him and Britney both need psychiatry and refuse it.
By take your meds, on January 11, 2008 21:48:44
Vigilante's Anus lisped: "And I'll never forget his final song, before he died aboard the space shuttle...it was titled "Religion is for Assholes". And, you know, it rings true, even today."
Sorry, but Hell is for assholes like you.
By Steve, on January 11, 2008 22:57:21
Is everyone who lives in California crazy? Really. I'm serious. Damn. It never stops. People out there are fucking whacked.
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 00:41:29
Every time these two kiss it makes me cringe...it screams, "this is totally fucking fake and creepy" as loudly now as it did the first time I saw it. Eeesh.
By Staci, on January 12, 2008 03:41:55
If you ever meet her, hit her as hard as you can! F scientology and f nazis.
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 07:07:07
Tom is so ugly! I cringe when I seen anyone kissing him, except for Will Smith and Travolta - then, the kisses just seem so....so right.
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 08:11:34
she looks like an alien
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 08:15:17
TC would NEVER get married without a prenup! What a croc! We all knew he had one with Nicole....he's just a horror, who would sign something like that for him (or anyone)??!?!
By Lola Lola, on January 12, 2008 09:26:11
I'm surprised no one has mentioned her dress yet. Wtf is up with the back of it? Is it unzipped? Wow, classy...
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 09:56:31
Damn that couple is creepy. Cruise desperately needs to hook back up with his old publicist, he comes off as a complete twat these days.
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 10:15:07
Vigilnate's anii are starting to bore me.
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 10:39:40
You guys forgot...the girl in the pic on the side looking on , dressed in blue, lookslike katie Sicentology minder. She was pictured with a monder several times. You forgot that Katie gets $3 mill a year forevery year,but also tons of world class rich people's shopping .
By Queen Ufreeher, on January 12, 2008 14:19:20
Y'know, if you were raised by Scientologists and surrounded by Scientologists and taught that all that nonsense is truth, you'd believe it. Just like if you were raised by Christians and surrounded by Christians, you'd believe all *that* nonsense is truth. Neither story is all that more bizarre than the other...it's just that the established religions have the weight of time behind them.
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 17:03:41
Hahahahahaha I know that it hasn't been posted yet, but does anyone want to take a swipe at Nicole Ritchie for naming her daughter Harlow? She must think it's the posh French version of harlot. Seems oddly appropriate though. I can see that just like any other loving mother, Nicole Ritchie has her daughter's life planned out for her.
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 19:23:25
From the mouths of babes in a predominantly Jewish Middle School on L.I. N.Y.:
Q:"What's mommy doing to Daddy in the bedroom:?"
A:"Making jewelry!"
It's one thing to marry for money. It's another to sell your soul to the Devil (ala Ozzy Osbourne) to keep yourself in designer rags. She's a worse pig than he. Amazing how low some will stoop.
IN the wisdom and words of my ex husband regarding his second wife: "WELL, She's no Heather Locklear." And his ass was broke.
Stupid, vapid, brainless wonders of desperate women. Shame, shame, Ms. "Holmes." How little the world thinks of you.
By anonymous, on January 12, 2008 22:57:48
For $3 mil a year, I'd make her sign a document that promises that not only will she give up that ass, but she'd beg in a convincing way that she really wanted it.
By anonymous, on January 13, 2008 08:16:07
If Scientology is a religion than so is being a Trekkie.
By Douglas Adams, on January 13, 2008 15:29:20
Breaking news****
Britney is planning to kill herself and I have proof. She's modeling herself after Princess Diana in every way right down to how she plans to die. Like Diana, Brit became famous as a teen, married a man that didn't love her and lost custody of her kids to that man just like Diana. Brit is bipolar and suicidal like Diana, is having a public meltdown like Diana, is sleeping with two different muslims like Diana, is too intimate with the paparazzi like Diana and like Diana she calls them herself when she craves attention. Now Brit is driving around erratically in her Mercedes with her muslim BF and just bought a house in Malibu just like Diana did right before she died. Why do you think Brit has suddenly adopted a British accent? Britney is experiencing bipolar delusions of grandeur and is fashioning herself to die tragically like Diana because she thinks it will make everyone love her forever. This is a clear sign is she is a danger to herself and should be locked up. If she boards a plane to Paris you know how it will end....
By Her family should present this to a judge, on January 13, 2008 15:31:14
See true love does not exist anymore.
Woman have high standards without giving anything in return.
Why have sympathy for shallow women like katie?
By anonymous, on January 13, 2008 23:03:32
It cost $5000 a year to keep a non-celeb women happy. Likely you have to make 85,000 a year to keep modern women happy.
By anonymous, on January 13, 2008 23:05:38
How expensive are you shoes men?
Woman prefer men who have shoes worth $300 a pair. Air jordans won't cut it.
By anonymous, on January 13, 2008 23:08:05
Why would he blow $3 million a year on Katie when he could have had Britney for free?
By anonymous, on January 13, 2008 23:44:19
Why would he blow $3 million a year on Katie when he could have had Britney for free?
Cheetos aren't free.
By anonymous, on January 14, 2008 08:52:56
Hey 15:31:14:
Just shut the hell up. You don't know SHIT. You're a fucking teenage moron who knows nothing about Twitney or life in general. You don't have any inside info, so just shut the fuck up. Fucking teenagers.
By Anonymous, on January 14, 2008 10:24:39
Hey 10:24:39:
Take it down a notch for Christ's sake. Take a Xanax or something. Fucking "people-with-anger-issues"...
By anonymous, on January 14, 2008 10:36:37
Okay, psychiatric meds might be off limits, but she's heavily doped up on SOMETHING.
By Foldout couch, on January 14, 2008 15:32:46
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