Both Tom and the Taco Bell dog are pointing at the Chola Ho and saying, "Wasn't me!" And somewhere, far off in a mouth-breathing land, Puff Daddy is laughing and under a sky filled with thunder and lightning.
And PS - I'm stunned: a fat, pregnant Puerto Rican with a reputation for having a cunt full of razor blades?
Next thing you'll be telling me Britney Spears isn't the tight-bodied seductress Rolling Stone led us to believe. Or Tom Cruise is gay. Or Heath Ledger is . . . yeah.
Gucci sponsored the Malawi event? Maybe they think it's a profittunity and will debut next season's Malawi-skin clutch with gold accents on the runway this year.
"Marc Anthony looks like a reanimated zombie from a Mexican-American War graveyard..." since the first time I laid eyes on this guy, I have struggled to find the perfect way to characterize his look. I'm floored by your spectacular description. It's poetry, pure poetry.
How is she going to have a Church of Scientology mandated "silent birth" when she's supposed to be having a C-Section? The clams are not going to be happy!
Tom Cruise got Jennifer Lopez in the cult to attract more Latinos to the cult. He got Will Smith in the cult to get more African Americans to join the cult. He got the Beckhams in the cult to get more British people to join the cult.This is how they work.
J Lo's belly with twins has got nothing on mine with my singular ten pound baby girl. I only gained 28 pounds total, but that belly defied gravity and it was all out front, too! Not all of us sport little baby bumps, especially we shorter waisted gals. Less length from rib cage to hips means less room for the uterus to stretch lengthwise, leaving it one way to go, OUTWARD.
Fair enough. But what's that titanic appendage threatening to rip the back seam of her muu-muu right in half?? The fabric appears to be screaming for its very life.
Yeah, I gotta say, I had an 11 pound boy and I was as big as the woman next door who was having twins. I was all out front and high, which meant I had a double shelf - chi chis and belly.
all right mark and tom. i have a very serious policy about not flirting with married women . . . but jenny is such a cutie with her little fat butt, and kate, uuumm. that look . . . what i could do with that look.
I think JLo looks pretty pregnant! Her face isn't all puffy! Too bad we can't say the same of this chick, the one who did Sabrina, The Teenage With. She does look horrible pregnant!
She must be totally pissed at Marc Anthony about what this is doing to her body. I hope he knows that he's going to see her pulling up her shirt and yelling about her stretch marks whenever they have a fight.
Hi you hillbillies! There’s a lot of cross eyed, buck teeth, banjo playing, porch wittling, shotgun toting, donkey fiddling, cousin lovin’, odd folk up here.
40 Comments:
Leave Your CommentBoth Tom and the Taco Bell dog are pointing at the Chola Ho and saying, "Wasn't me!" And somewhere, far off in a mouth-breathing land, Puff Daddy is laughing and under a sky filled with thunder and lightning.
By She-nonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:02:28
Hey look it's another thinly veiled Scientology recruitment event!
By Xenu, on February 7, 2008 10:03:43
And PS - I'm stunned: a fat, pregnant Puerto Rican with a reputation for having a cunt full of razor blades?
Next thing you'll be telling me Britney Spears isn't the tight-bodied seductress Rolling Stone led us to believe. Or Tom Cruise is gay. Or Heath Ledger is . . . yeah.
By She-nonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:04:02
I forgot J-Ho was a Scientologist now. barf
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:06:46
Gucci sponsored the Malawi event? Maybe they think it's a profittunity and will debut next season's Malawi-skin clutch with gold accents on the runway this year.
By She-nonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:06:49
yikers. is anyone sure that she's not actually having quadruplets and the other two are in that ginormous ass?
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:18:03
"Marc Anthony looks like a reanimated zombie from a Mexican-American War graveyard..." since the first time I laid eyes on this guy, I have struggled to find the perfect way to characterize his look. I'm floored by your spectacular description. It's poetry, pure poetry.
By Slappy White, on February 7, 2008 10:19:08
I like this picture of Tom Cruise better:
http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=r9q3gn&s=3
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:22:23
I can hardly wait to see what the spawns of Skeletor and the Puerto Rican hussy look like...
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:24:37
How is she going to have a Church of Scientology mandated "silent birth" when she's supposed to be having a C-Section? The clams are not going to be happy!
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:26:04
The Rican skank is a scientologist? It must have taken weeks to remove all of the virgin mary statues from her house.
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:33:23
I'm not surprised. In the movies I've seen, the children of the undead usually come out as half-sized adults.
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:36:07
I wonder if she realizes the babies will be expecting her breasts to deliver liquid brains.
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:38:08
Tom Cruise got Jennifer Lopez in the cult to attract more Latinos to the cult. He got Will Smith in the cult to get more African Americans to join the cult. He got the Beckhams in the cult to get more British people to join the cult.This is how they work.
By the more you know, on February 7, 2008 10:39:11
Jack Sprat could eat no fat
His wife could eat no lean...
By Big L, on February 7, 2008 10:39:36
What's this crazy talk about C-Sections? Everyone knows that Lopez will deliver her children through her anus.
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 10:40:59
I think it would be more appropriate to call her JELLO from now on....
By she's a pig, on February 7, 2008 11:11:55
weight gain and nose jobs dont mix. eek.
By scarlit, on February 7, 2008 11:14:07
How many pounds of burritos and tacos go into that belly on a daily basis? I'm going to say the over/under is 47.
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 11:28:38
Not only is J-Ho huge, she's also a piece of shit diva bitch with no talent.
By Ooba Gooba, on February 7, 2008 12:47:50
Heyyy, pointing at the fetus spawn of Latin satan. How cool. And original!
By Erkitalentz, on February 7, 2008 13:22:10
Damn shes huge!
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 13:28:26
Is it just me, or does the hand on Marc's shoulder make it lok like Katies arm is unbelievably long?
By MADdie, on February 7, 2008 13:33:55
that's not big for twins, that's pretty normal.
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 13:43:19
even her face got pregnant..or more directly..her NOSE!
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 14:16:02
lol, her ass is as big as her tummy
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 14:49:40
J Lo's belly with twins has got nothing on mine with my singular ten pound baby girl. I only gained 28 pounds total, but that belly defied gravity and it was all out front, too! Not all of us sport little baby bumps, especially we shorter waisted gals. Less length from rib cage to hips means less room for the uterus to stretch lengthwise, leaving it one way to go, OUTWARD.
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 16:25:08
Fair enough. But what's that titanic appendage threatening to rip the back seam of her muu-muu right in half?? The fabric appears to be screaming for its very life.
By whale of a gal, on February 7, 2008 19:12:17
Yeah, I gotta say, I had an 11 pound boy and I was as big as the woman next door who was having twins. I was all out front and high, which meant I had a double shelf - chi chis and belly.
By JC, on February 7, 2008 19:54:25
I get so f'ing tired of this. Women are huge during their last trimester. It's the same every time. Quit acting surprised.
By anonymous, on February 7, 2008 19:54:36
Ahhh...keep her away from Tom Cruise. Fucking psycho.
By Anais, on February 7, 2008 20:08:12
all right mark and tom. i have a very serious policy about not flirting with married women . . . but jenny is such a cutie with her little fat butt, and kate, uuumm. that look . . . what i could do with that look.
By Herman B, on February 8, 2008 04:59:53
11 lb baby? God bless you.
By anonymous, on February 8, 2008 07:31:41
To freaking funny, I fear the twins are NOT going to be to cute, At any rate, They will at least be loaded.
By Popcornridge, on February 8, 2008 07:56:31
I think JLo looks pretty pregnant! Her face isn't all puffy! Too bad we can't say the same of this chick, the one who did Sabrina, The Teenage With. She does look horrible pregnant!
By Bery, on February 8, 2008 12:25:02
She must be totally pissed at Marc Anthony about what this is doing to her body. I hope he knows that he's going to see her pulling up her shirt and yelling about her stretch marks whenever they have a fight.
By anonymous, on February 8, 2008 14:35:33
Damn who ate J. Lo? She looks fucking massive!
By anonymous, on February 9, 2008 01:11:38
Hi you hillbillies! There’s a lot of cross eyed, buck teeth, banjo playing, porch wittling, shotgun toting, donkey fiddling, cousin lovin’, odd folk up here.
By anonymous, on February 9, 2008 01:39:13
She looks like she ate her husband's dinner AND her husband.
By May, on February 10, 2008 14:59:55
Why is her nose spreading out as she gets bigger in her pregnancy? Or is it just my imagination?
By Tania, on February 11, 2008 03:53:35
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