IDontLikeYouInThatWay.com: JLo Wants Tom Cruise to Brainwash Her Kids

JLo Wants Tom Cruise to Brainwash Her Kids

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Tom will be so pissed when he learns that Marc already ate the placenta (before it came out, actually).

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 12:26:32
Someone please explain to me why a couple of bambinos need $200,000 christening outfits or a $200,000 party they won't remember? What boneheads these people are. Buy a christening outfit in the mall for $49 and have some pizza hut, give the rest to CHARITY.

By Rich people are idiots, on April 7, 2008 12:27:27
Those filthy rich PIGS should gift that money to sick kids with no health insurance, ones who are dying of cancer and their parents can't afford to stay at the hospital with them in their last days.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 12:30:23
^ Scientologists tell people that Scientologists don't get sick because of the vitamins they take. That's a lie of course. Tom won't donate money to sick people, but he will try to get them to join his cult if they want to be "cured".

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 12:33:52
I call "bullshit". The Catholic Church wouldn't even let my brother, a Lutheran, be the godfather for my daughter. No way a Catholic church will let a $cientologist be the godfather - no matter how gay the priest is!

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 12:35:51
The Catholic church is full of crooks so I'm sure they make exceptions for their multi millionaire members (and their friends) if they give the church enough money in return.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 12:38:09
$200,000 on designer christening outfits...
$200,000 'Welcome to the World' themed-party

Classy.

By Fred, on April 7, 2008 12:41:57
Doesn't a godfather have to believe in one creator god, and not space aliens? $cientology's founder believed Christ is a false memory implanted into humans, so what business would Cruise or any other $cientologist have in a Christian church? This is all too wierd, if it's true.

By catman, on April 7, 2008 12:45:17
They're Catholic my ASS. They're on their third/second marriages, screwed around while one of them was still married, and Hopez dabbles in Santeria to get revenge on people she hates.

A Catholic church would baptize the poor bambini because it isn't their fault, but no way would they accept a grinning creepy alien. Especially one who would throw a tantrum because they now have altar girls instead of boys.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 13:09:42
12:38:09, here's your tinfoil hat.

BTW, this could be considered pretty good proof that these disgusting people are Scienobots. A godparent is supposed to give religious guidance.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 13:11:13
I'm glad I'm not the only one who was nauseated by the ridiculous extravagance being thrown at these babies. Are we supposed to be impressed? I'm disgusted. Just another reason to hate these people.

By Kate, on April 7, 2008 13:11:57
These people are not devoted Catholics. They only say that to keep their Latino fans because that's the only fans they have. If they admit they're not practicing Catholics and/or are $cientologists their fans will leave them.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 13:12:03
Poor Katie Holmes. Having to sit around with Tom Cruise and JLo sounds like the seventh circle of hell. I'd probably kill myself.

By thebig28, on April 7, 2008 13:26:37
I read in rolling stone a while ago that j.lo demands white rose petals in her toilet in dressing rooms. the whole room has to be white.
although that in itself is utterly obnoxious, i dont think shes a practicing member of santaria. i mean, come on.

By ladyguitarstar, on April 7, 2008 13:38:31
ladyguitarstar: I saw a J.Ho rider list (list of demands, like all-white dressing room) at thesmokinggun a couple years back. It's probably still there.

By catman, on April 7, 2008 13:51:53
Have you ever noticed how Marc Anthony looks like the Sloth victom from the movie Seven?

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 14:10:20
I agree with poster "12:38:09" Godparents are supposed to be relious guides. If they don't belong to the Catholic Church (in this case) and therefore don't know the systems, rituals etc, how in the world can they accomplish this? It's not possible and it won't be accepted. I don't see TommyBoy putting aside he alien beliefs out of the goodness of his heart to do this.

By OhWhatever!, on April 7, 2008 14:10:36
Not surprsing at all. J-Ho and other celbutards are not noted for their intellectual rigor.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 14:14:01
Both Scientology and Catholicism are both wealthy cults run by gay men.

By Elephant in the Corner, on April 7, 2008 14:14:52
NO shit! of course she wants to brain wash those kids, into thinking they are cute and attractive, into thinking daddy is hot and into thinking mummy is the sexiest person on earth. Those kids popped out of the womb brainwahsed.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 14:35:57
J-Ho is an absolute cunt.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 16:04:02
Damn, Marc looks BAD.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 16:09:48
White rose petals in her toilet? WTF?

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 16:11:03
I have to second catman...how the hell do scientologists have godparents?

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 16:18:50
At what point to we begin the war against Scientologists and kill them all?

By justin, on April 7, 2008 18:34:08
If they are baptised in the Catholic church, then Tom Cruise CANNOT be their "official" godparent. To be a godparent in the Catholic church, you must not only be Catholic, but have been baptised, had first communion, and confirmation in the catholic church. They consider a godparent to be the person that will give the child religious guidance throughout their life. (I know this because the Catholic church refused to let me be a godparent to my cousin because I had not been confirmed.)

However, many people consider a godparent to be the person who will take care of the child if the parents were killed. So maybe that's what they mean. Which is an even scarier thought!

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 19:29:53
I would like to remind Jennifer that this is an affront to her religion. We here at the catholic church would not condone a non catholic to be the godfather of her two children.

Beyond that simple fact, he is the face of a most dangerous cult. Those of us here in Clearwater are well aware of their mistreatment and human right abuses of their members.

Miss Lopez should seriously reconsider who she wants being the spiritual shepherd for her children.

The story at least has one thing going for it, exposing Tom Cruise’s scientology affilitation and the note that it is indeed a danegrous cult.

By Father Skep T McAnony, on April 7, 2008 20:17:47
Meh, chicken bones or tin cans attached to a volt--meter... it's six of one, half dozen of the other. What a bunch of lunatic assholes. Pity Suri and the twins. Money can't buy sanity, obviously, and even a $100M mansion isn't much of a home under the circumstances.

By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 20:33:07
When I read this I didn't think much of it, then I put the pieces together.

Tom likes Will Smith who likes J.Lo, its a three way!

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 02:06:37
why are they giving these rich kids so much stuff? aren't needy kids in this country that they could help. i guess L. Ron told tom that he needs to help minorities and JLO and Marc Anthony were the only two he knows. pathetic

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 03:33:17
Why does Marc always look like hes suffering from a fatal disease?

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 03:57:31
Reply to By anonymous, on April 7, 2008 12:30:23

I agree with your statement. They are greedy, self absorbed low class scum. They will always be filthy Latinos no matter how many gold flecked baths they take.

Jlowwwww looks like a tranny with fat arms!

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 05:55:15
They are an ugly couple. Someone feed that guy.

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 06:43:07
If this is in fact true, then she has already become a Scientologist. In the Catholic religion, godparents must be Catholic as well. That is the whole point. They do not have to raise your child, should something happen to you and the other parent, in anything else but their religious education.

By LRM216, on April 8, 2008 10:05:09
MARC ANTHONY LOOKS LIKE THE CRYPT KEEPER,FROM SCI FI CHANNEL

By SKULL HEAD, on April 8, 2008 10:08:37
OK, I am a Catholic but my husband is not. We wanted my sister-in-law to be our daughter's godmother, but she is not Catholic. Our priest said that was fine as long as she was committed to being our daughter's spiritual guardian. My brother is her godfather though, and he is Catholic. In our case, if at least one godparent is Catholic, then if the other one wasn't, that's ok. So, maybe it depends on your priest/parish.

Back to the point of this site - what a bunch of poseurs. I was flipping through People in my dentist office of that photo shoot with the twins. She looked like she was tolerating holding them while being photgraphed, but then was probably ready to hand them off to the nanny(ies). It's impossible for her to just be a "real" person.

By kat, on April 8, 2008 10:09:18
I think ole Tom was Catholic before he became a pod person. Does that make any difference?

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 11:12:00
whatever but...Kill Katie please!

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 12:42:28
What's that maid doing with that AIDS patient ?

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 15:31:27
What's that maid doing with that AIDS patient ?

AHAHAHAHAH yeah he reminds me of the sloth victim in seven too..

Tom Cruise needs to be assasinated. Anyone who believes they can stop time, astral projection and all that other horseshit needs to fall off the planet. RLH was a fucking sci fi writer for christs sake

By ladyguitarstar, on April 8, 2008 16:38:06
Is everybody a scientologist. Put all those fuckerers on an island and blow that fucker up!!!!!!!!!!

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 17:31:59
That picture is...bizarre...

By anonymous, on April 8, 2008 22:00:44
Jesus, they look like evil villains from a child's nightmare in that photo...what the hell?

By Staci, on April 9, 2008 12:06:28
trabajo? WORK? TRABAJO?

By anonymous, on April 10, 2008 08:35:20