"The girls at the massage parlor prefer a cool blend of rock hits from the '80s, '90s and today. Especially the one-hour commercial free rock blocks. "It now commuhsha fwee, numbah1 G.I.!" they are fond of telling me."
More hilarious words have never been written. Well, besides, "Nick Hogan was found hanging from a sheet inside his cell today, officials say."
Homegirl doesn't get that her 20's are over. Not saying she has get all geriatric but there is an appropriate way to dress in your 30's. This isn't it.
She has no ass. She has no muscle tone. She's ugly when she smiles. She used to be so pretty. She needs to fire her gay stylists and all of her entourage.
She needs to fire her gay stylists and all of her entourage.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 13:13:32
I don't think you can blame "The Gays" for this one. I'm pretty sure Mariah "styles" herself now. She was working with Andre Leon Talley from Vogue when she released her last album and she never looked better. I think her current look is all her own. Unfortunately.
ladyguitarstar: Even when "throwing" a baseball, Mariah can't quit doing the parakeet posturing. Seriously, is someone just constantly holding up a mirror for this half-wit to gaze into? WTF?
Somebody help me. There are too many baseball/sex jokes that need to be made and I'm too busy at work. Base on balls? High and inside? Perhaps a body part being nicknamed "the gap"? Help me out, people. My undying respect if you can work in Pythagorean expectation.
I saw her get out of her limo in NYC in front of the Virgin record store several years ago. She looked atrocious in person and this was several years ago ! She was all dolled up, stickin' out her chest and booty at 2 pm in the afternoon like she was on-stage or something...it was one of the most pityful sights I've ever come across
You guys are way too picky with women. I would be happy riding that ass for the rest of my dying days. Her personality would suck having to deal with, but definitely not that ass! But I'm not a closet homo like some of you must be. And while I'm at it, Jessica Simpson is hot too - all you quick to call a hot chick a tranny, "studs" out there.
Actually, the Japanese have a popular music scene pretty close to ours in the West, so, yeah, there's a lot of R&B. Most of it is sung in Japanese, though.
It's wrong to think the Japanese as such backward, different people.
You guys are way too picky with women. I would be happy riding that ass for the rest of my dying days. Her personality would suck having to deal with, but definitely not that ass! But I'm not a closet homo like some of you must be. And while I'm at it, Jessica Simpson is hot too - all you quick to call a hot chick a tranny, "studs" out there.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 22:33:50
someone's bitter! because all they get to sleep with is fat and/or ugly chicks apparantly.Your taste in 'girls' is horrific.
ladyguitarstar, Any straight male would gladly play with Mariah's rolls of flab, myself included. Any contradictions to this statement are false and ridiculous.
-08:55:22, Don't really care for screen names, even a well-thought out one that resembles anime heroes. Btw, you really need to STFU and get a fucken life, cheers.
Someone needs to tell this hoity toity women that YOU DON'T WEAR HIGH HEELS TO AN ATHLETIC EVENT. There's a picture of assistant beater whatsherface the model playing softball in tennis shoes WITH HIGH FUCKING HEELS. What dumbasses...
49 Comments:
Leave Your CommentThe crowd came to the park hearing that a huge tuna-smelling whale will be served. Alas...
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 12:47:23
"The girls at the massage parlor prefer a cool blend of rock hits from the '80s, '90s and today. Especially the one-hour commercial free rock blocks. "It now commuhsha fwee, numbah1 G.I.!" they are fond of telling me."
More hilarious words have never been written. Well, besides, "Nick Hogan was found hanging from a sheet inside his cell today, officials say."
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 12:47:56
the way she dresses reminds me of trashy moms who dont know how to stop dressing like theyre 19
By ladyguitarstar, on May 28, 2008 12:49:14
"Mariah Carey Throws a Pitch"
...right into Nick Cannon's ass.
By Jennifer, on May 28, 2008 12:51:54
Does she *ever* wipe that stupid, plastic smile off her face? I swear to crap I just want to punch her.
By Nick Cannon, on May 28, 2008 12:54:22
"the way she dresses reminds me of trashy moms who dont know how to stop dressing like theyre 19"
I.e. Hispanics
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 12:57:56
actually she's really big in japan.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 13:01:36
"actually she's really big in japan."
No that's just her ass, and it's big everywhere.
By Santos, on May 28, 2008 13:06:57
Homegirl doesn't get that her 20's are over. Not saying she has get all geriatric but there is an appropriate way to dress in your 30's. This isn't it.
By kathy, on May 28, 2008 13:10:08
She has no ass. She has no muscle tone. She's ugly when she smiles. She used to be so pretty. She needs to fire her gay stylists and all of her entourage.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 13:13:32
This bitch deserves a nice plane crash.
By Slappy, on May 28, 2008 13:18:01
She needs to fire her gay stylists and all of her entourage.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 13:13:32
I don't think you can blame "The Gays" for this one. I'm pretty sure Mariah "styles" herself now. She was working with Andre Leon Talley from Vogue when she released her last album and she never looked better. I think her current look is all her own. Unfortunately.
By Ashley, on May 28, 2008 13:19:48
I still think she's pretty
By Obviously Gay, on May 28, 2008 13:22:39
Lame Lame Lame!
By Albatross, on May 28, 2008 13:51:53
ladyguitarstar:
Even when "throwing" a baseball, Mariah can't quit doing the parakeet posturing. Seriously, is someone just constantly holding up a mirror for this half-wit to gaze into? WTF?
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 14:09:30
Somebody help me. There are too many baseball/sex jokes that need to be made and I'm too busy at work. Base on balls? High and inside? Perhaps a body part being nicknamed "the gap"? Help me out, people. My undying respect if you can work in Pythagorean expectation.
By Santos, on May 28, 2008 14:12:36
A few weeks ago Mariah was looking pretty hot. Now she just looks like my girlfriend. What's up with that?
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 14:34:36
How does a black girl manage to have no ass?
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 14:38:34
Oh, Santos, if only I were more of a sports person!
How does a black girl manage to have no ass?
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 14:38:34
She's only a third black or something, the rest being Irish and Latino. I guess she can blame the Micks for her case of noassitol.
By Ashley, on May 28, 2008 14:47:52
How the hell did those face-windshields get so popular?
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 14:48:21
Mariah aint black... the only black she has in her is Nick Cannon.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 15:06:32
I know this is probably the happiest time in her life so I'll just say....Please hire a fucking stylist.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 16:14:41
I saw her get out of her limo in NYC in front of the Virgin record store several years ago. She looked atrocious in person and this was several years ago !
She was all dolled up, stickin' out her chest and booty at 2 pm in the afternoon like she was on-stage or something...it was one of the most pityful sights I've ever come across
By ana g, on May 28, 2008 16:22:20
"My undying respect if you can work in Pythagorean expectation."
Nice. Another sabermetrician. I'm guessing we're the only 2 here.
By J-Bird, on May 28, 2008 16:34:11
If it wasn't for Japan, she wouldn't be rich. That is where her albums sell--Japan!
By piper, on May 28, 2008 16:35:17
Throws: Right
Bats: Right
Runs: Her mouth
By Tommy Mattola, on May 28, 2008 16:38:17
1993
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 17:17:46
all i know is this hoe did playboy and didnt even take her shit off....c.t.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 17:35:20
"Mariah aint black... the only black she has in her is Nick Cannon."
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 15:06:32
Shouldn't that be Nick's cannon?
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 17:46:44
May we all pray for the day, when Mariah hits one of those high falsetto notes and shatters her glass brain.
By teammlr1, on May 28, 2008 18:22:55
If I wanted to see a fat Puerto Rican cow in tight clothes, I'd be at K-Mart.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 18:40:00
She looked sizzlin hot on American idol. 18:40:00....re your Puerto Rican comment,.... that was damn funny. :)
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 19:48:23
who the fuck wears a silk jacket with their own name on it?! just their first name. she's like a he-man doll in barbie clothes.
By nic, on May 28, 2008 20:29:49
You guys are way too picky with women. I would be happy riding that ass for the rest of my dying days. Her personality would suck having to deal with, but definitely not that ass! But I'm not a closet homo like some of you must be. And while I'm at it, Jessica Simpson is hot too - all you quick to call a hot chick a tranny, "studs" out there.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 22:33:50
Actually, the Japanese have a popular music scene pretty close to ours in the West, so, yeah, there's a lot of R&B. Most of it is sung in Japanese, though.
It's wrong to think the Japanese as such backward, different people.
By Yupgiboy, on May 28, 2008 23:17:30
-23:17:30, you should put down your anime dvd's and lighten the fuck up.
By anonymous, on May 29, 2008 00:46:02
@May 28, 2008 22:33:50
How's that stretch in jail going?
By anonymous, on May 29, 2008 02:15:38
You go to Japan you see that they love Mariah. They get into R&B, but they mostly love our divas.
By adam, on May 29, 2008 06:57:18
Nah, I hate Anime. I love Japanese Music though.
You might want to refer to me by my nick, though, instead of the time I wrote that comment since I gave one ANONYMOUS 00:46:02.
I realise what was written was in jest, but I felt the need to clear that point up. I think you might be the one who needs to lighten the fuck up.
By Yupgiboy, on May 29, 2008 08:55:22
You guys are way too picky with women. I would be happy riding that ass for the rest of my dying days. Her personality would suck having to deal with, but definitely not that ass! But I'm not a closet homo like some of you must be. And while I'm at it, Jessica Simpson is hot too - all you quick to call a hot chick a tranny, "studs" out there.
By anonymous, on May 28, 2008 22:33:50
someone's bitter! because all they get to sleep with is fat and/or ugly chicks apparantly.Your taste in 'girls' is horrific.
By ladyguitarstar, on May 29, 2008 09:57:33
ladyguitarstar,
Any straight male would gladly play with Mariah's rolls of flab, myself included. Any contradictions to this statement are false and ridiculous.
By J-Bird, on May 29, 2008 10:41:19
lol j bird, ok so youll do her, but according to your comments on other posts, youd do alot of chicks. but youre funny!
By ladyguitarstar, on May 29, 2008 10:51:59
"noassitol"
That's going in my dictionary.
By Santos, on May 29, 2008 12:58:25
12:57:56, most Hispanic women dress in a decent way,so unless you know them all you shouldn`t generalize over an ethnicity, you fucking ignorant.
By Educating Hillbillies, on May 29, 2008 15:06:19
Jesus....Stephen Hawking could have made a better throw. Still, I'd tap that for the rest of my days!!!
By anonymous, on May 29, 2008 15:23:09
12:57:56, most Hispanic women dress in a decent way,so unless you know them all you shouldn`t generalize over an ethnicity, you fucking ignorant.
By Educating Hillbillies, on May 29, 2008 15:06:19
Irony.
No.
Make that hypocrisy.
By anonymous, on May 29, 2008 15:37:51
-08:55:22, Don't really care for screen names, even a well-thought out one that resembles anime heroes. Btw, you really need to STFU and get a fucken life, cheers.
By anonymous, on May 29, 2008 16:37:04
Luckily for her, Japan is stuck in 1999 and STILL listens to terrible, terrible music.
At least she's popular somewhere... right? Right?!?!
By anonymous, on May 31, 2008 11:32:40
Someone needs to tell this hoity toity women that YOU DON'T WEAR HIGH HEELS TO AN ATHLETIC EVENT. There's a picture of assistant beater whatsherface the model playing softball in tennis shoes WITH HIGH FUCKING HEELS. What dumbasses...
By anonymous, on June 1, 2008 20:37:05
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