87 Comments:

1. Word on the street is that she and her castmates will soon be touring with the circus.
   I think their act will be considered as consisting of a "cunning array of stunts".

   By Elmer Fuddpucker, on October 22, 2008 13:08:04

2. To be fair, no other actress has quite the same pedigree as her.

   By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:09:03

3. She almost won another Golden Globe last year. She lost by a nose.

   By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:10:10

4. Oh, she's not that ugly. Stop riding her.

   By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:10:29

5. Her two favorite automobiles are the Mustang and the Bronco.

   By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:11:36

6. Her favorite beer is Colt 45.

   By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:12:04

7. After the "Unsexiest Woman" scandal broke, she fired her publicist. And by "fired" I mean she kicked him with her hind legs.

   By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:13:28

8. She will always have to deal with neighsayers.

   By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:15:55

9. Hopefully she doesn't sustain any serious leg injuries, because...

   By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:16:06

10. i guess nobody else noticed that she looks like a horse!

    By freddy mac, on October 22, 2008 13:18:38

11. She's a powerful female actress and producer, making people deal with her on her own terms, as an equus.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:18:48

12. She ran track in high school. Her event was the 12 furlong dash.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:20:03

13. She's hot.

    By Big Brown, on October 22, 2008 13:20:59

14. I'm sure she's going to go right out and get a head transplant just to make everyone here happy.
    
    "See? I AM pretty! Do you like me now?"
    
    You people are morons.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:22:05

15. I hear she loves getting mounted by short hispanic men.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:22:46

16. She's bound to have better luck. I was eating at a Chinese restaurant and their calendar said it was her year.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:24:26

17. She should cut of her head and replace it with a pumpkin.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:25:09

18. I can't be a neigh-sayer, I have to agree with all these other comments.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:26:44

19. I hear she doesn't party much. She prefers a stable lifestyle.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:28:03

20. I went on a date wither her and she had the worst table manners. It's as if she was raised in a barn.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:28:47

21. Someone needs to get Daniel Radcliffe nude and drive a stilletto into her eyes.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:29:48

22. I hear she decided to be a unicorn for Halloween. She only needed to buy 1 item.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:30:16

23. I think I see a little alfalfa on her lip in pic 6.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:33:39

24. I'm so vain.

    By Sarah's Hands, on October 22, 2008 13:37:01

25. GAH! She has never been hot. Blech.

    By Albatross, on October 22, 2008 13:40:51

26. She has great shoes. I hear she uses the best farrier in town.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:41:00

27. PETA was protesting Sex and the City after it was discovered that they made SJP "talk" by giving her electric shocks.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:44:03

28. I, for one, admire her success. The movie was a big success, and now nobody can say her career has stalled.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:44:32

29. When she dies, her wishes are to have her glue poured into the ocean.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:47:05

30. Will she have another hit series? I wouldn't bet against her.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:49:18

31. Some actresses donate their hair to cancer hospitals. SJP donates her hair to guitar stores.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:50:23

32. She's starring in the sequel to 'Factory Girl', but they had to change the name to 'Factory Glue'.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:54:13

33. If the Green Goblin and Dee Snider were to reproduce, this is what you would get...

    By Chris D, on October 22, 2008 13:54:28

34. She recently wanted to beanch out into singing, but her manager said "neigh" to that after hearing her sing. Apparently, she sounded a bit horse.

    By Anthony!!, on October 22, 2008 13:56:33

35. wow somebody's sure got some jokes today.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:57:42

36. She's champing at the bit for more challenging roles.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:57:51

37. I saw her in the supermarket the other day and she was behaving very oddly. She must be losing it...she grabbed a can of dogfood from the isle and screamed "Mom, is that YOU?"

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:01:11

38. Her daughter asked for a pony for Christmas, but SJP refused because she considers it slavery.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:02:48

39. She is a powerful actress. 4 Golden Globes, 2 Emmy awards, countless nominations--and yet the Triple Crown eludes her.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:03:19

40. I hear she is into bondage. Her favorite kinky move is to have her mate drawn & quartered.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:04:37

41. Thanks alot! Now my penis is running down the street screaming for his mother.

    By humpinfrog, on October 22, 2008 14:13:51

42. I hear the military wants to use her as part of their plan to invade Iran. Something about hiding a bunch of soldiers inside of her and presenting her as a gift...

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:14:31

43. I hear she had to go to a bridle shop for her wedding gown.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:16:30

44. Wow, those were...not funny.
    Keep 'em coming.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:17:27

45. Who are those men behind her in the banner pic? Are they the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse?

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:18:05

46. I hear she's into interracial dating. Once you go black velvet, you never go back.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:19:24

47. We really need to reign in these jokes.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:22:55

48. Hahaha, I have to admit this thread is awesome. HOWEVER, I like SJP and I think she deserves props for not chopping up her face like every other plastic-surgery obsessed star.

    By KC, on October 22, 2008 14:43:52

49. #40--I hear their safe word is "Whoa."

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 14:46:40

50. She's old,ugly,and overrated. YUCK,YUCK,YUCK!!!!!

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 15:25:16

51. I hear SJP loves warm apple cider. In fact, she's going to stirrup a batch right now.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 15:52:22

52. Thank you everyone for posting today! Oh my God, I had to wipe the tears from my eyes! This, by far, has to be the FUNNIEST comments page I've seen in some time...

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 16:54:18

53. I hear SJP loves warm apple cider. In fact, she's going to stirrup a batch right now.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 18:15:38

54. Her confidence is way up after the success of her movie. These days she's really feeling her oats.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 18:59:37

55. She looks like someone's insane aunt.
    

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 19:45:19

56. She is truly not a beauty in the classical sense, but she does have a lot of personal appeal, and she certainly does not look like a cookie cutter Barbie doll like a lot of today's current celebs. She also seems grounded, and she's still married to Matthew Broderick so I have to give her kudos, (and carrots) for that!

    By Sammy's hip, on October 22, 2008 20:49:29

57. Is SJP ugly? Neigh, neigh I say!
    
    48, you can't have your chin drastically reshaped. So it's not that she isn't, it's that she can't.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 20:54:04

58. I bet Matthew Broderick rides that all night. Glad that maritally, he's staying in the saddle.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 20:54:59

59. OK, so why does everyone hate her? Is it just because she's ugly? Come on now, you know you're all butt ugly too so should I hate on all of you?

    By Don't be assholes, on October 22, 2008 22:19:25

60. shes stunning for halloween.

    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 23:33:48

61. There's nothing wrong with her face!!

    By Flicka, on October 23, 2008 05:22:05

62. She's jockeying for a better film roles.

    By Storm, on October 23, 2008 06:11:38

63. You guys are too damn funny! LOL

    By Albatross, on October 23, 2008 06:33:54

64. So she's looking a little long in the tooth. The French still love her.

    By Bon appetit!, on October 23, 2008 06:55:36

65. Her and Broderick have a strong relationship, but he credits her as being the glue that holds them together.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 07:03:08

66. She is looking way too thin, taut, and muscled. She needs to fire her trainer (Bob Baffert).

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 08:12:41

67. I hear she loves getting mounted by short hispanic men.
    
    By anonymous, on October 22, 2008 13:22:46
    
    ============================================
    
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA GOOD ONE , damn she is ugly why do the paps keep taking her pic what a waste of flash

    By SJP and her huge nose , on October 23, 2008 08:50:54

68. Apparently the book, "1001 Horse Jokes" was on the clearnace rack at Walmart today.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 09:40:06

69. Are all these horse jokes posted by the same person??? Cause it seems like someone's on a role!

    By Criwstin, on October 23, 2008 10:20:57

70. judging from the pics this is like beating a dead horse.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 11:15:52

71. At least she doesn't drive drunk like everyone else in Hollywood. When SJP drinks, she's smart enough to just hoof it.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 11:37:43

72. I hear she has a medical condition where she is dehydrated often. Apparently the doctors tried to lead her to water, but they couldn't make her drink.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 11:39:09

73. Bitch done ate up all my oats and wouldn't blow me until I got some more.

    By Mr. Ed, on October 23, 2008 11:40:28

74. she looked hot in Honeymoon in Vegas... but ever since... butterface!

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 11:44:12

75. Did you know that Sarah was accepted at every single college she applied to? Yes, apparently the admissions directors love applicants who write in "palomino" as their ethnicity.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 11:46:43

76. You people are really rude. She is an attractive women. People gang up on her because she plays a "powerful" woman in sex and the city. Get over it.

    By sane person, on October 23, 2008 13:11:04

77. "People gang up on her because she plays a "powerful" woman in sex and the city."
    
    Right on, sister! Why must everyone have this herd mentality? I don't know what Sarah did to spur such behavior. You should all just gallop away from this thread. These comments are really foal, and they mare what is an otherwise great website. You should stop being such donkeys and pony up the courage to think for yourselves!

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 13:48:09

78. "People gang up on her because she plays a "powerful" woman in sex and the city."
    
    Powerful woman? She plays a character who is obsessed with buying shoes, spends her nights chasing after rich men with 3 of her skank friends, and then writes about it in her diary.
    Yeah, she's a true inspiration.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 13:59:11

79. People gang up on her because she plays a "powerful" woman in sex and the city.
    
    She may be powerful, but she still had to turn down that coveted role in Hidalgo--she just knew Viggo Mortensen would be too heavy. Plus, the 900-pound weight gain required for the part spooked her.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 14:11:04

80. #76. I hear she is quite powerful. . . out of the gates.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 14:13:56

81. SJP walked into a bar. The bartender said "Why the long face?"

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 16:42:18

82. If she gets too ugly to make movies, she can always fall back on her secretariat skills.

    By anonymous, on October 23, 2008 22:14:49

83. Ok, I've really had it with all these horse jokes. You people are making her out to be some kind of nightmare.

    By anonymous, on October 24, 2008 03:34:07

84. The other commenter had it right, she plays a powerful woman who uses her survival skills to make it in the big city. Clearly, she's nobody's foal.

    By anonymous, on October 24, 2008 03:36:16

85. Everyone, everyone.. let's take a minute to welcome #14 to the site!! it's their first time. welcome!

    By stef, on October 24, 2008 09:16:45

86. #14 has a point. There's enormous pressure on SJP to conform to the stereotypical Hollywood image. Society keeps making her chase that carrot.

    By anonymous, on October 24, 2008 10:03:50

87. Yes, she IS that ugly. We all voted, and the neighs have it. I don't want to ride her, I just wish she would go away.

    By anonymous, on October 25, 2008 05:35:45