Not sure the penis picture sending thing is a good idea. I did that a few times, but the last fucking time I did, my g/f's mom answered the phone. Imagine how embarrassed I was showing up at her parents' house two days later.
Don't send photos of your penis to any person. They can be used against you later in court. And those ignorant people won't understand. They're so ignorant!
I can top this. For the two months prior to my birthday this year, I was dating this guy we'll call F. F was hot, fun, successful, etc. In the month before my birthday, he got a DUI while I was in the car, and I bailed him out of jail, and later testified in court on his behalf so that he was later found not-guilty. Because of this, and our growing relationship, I expected at least dinner or something for my birthday...yeah not so much. On my birthday, F kept telling me he had a special surprise and I would love it...I was getting increasingly excited. I asked him all day to tell me what it was, and to give me clues, and finally he relented, and told me he'd tell me. "ok," I asked excitedly, "what is my birthday present/surprise, and where can I find it?" "Baaaaabe," he replied, "I've been WORKING OUT!" Yeah, needless to say, the last time we slept together was ON MY BIRTHDAY. Douche.
By the only positive of this was that it made for joke fodder for the next 3 weeks, on July 20, 2009 10:43:07
#15, please tell me you boinked him BEFORE he told you the surprise....
Really if the guy can ride this shit out looking like a cross breed of Willim Dafoe and Eddie Munster than more power to him. I mean he must have something going for him as he's bangin' some Tinseltown elite. Ya I'm no fan but I can appreciate a guy who looks like he smells like ass crack gettin' one over on some pretty decent snatch. Love the game... love the playa.... playa
#18 WTF are you for real? or just some dueling banjo back country in bred homo makin it look like allyall sista girls are as illiterate as the stereotype goes..... Damn gurl... you go! Don't let thems folks do that to you. We alls better'n that!
#15,,, Thanks for the insight, ( now we can all move on ) . Fuck if i was guy dating you, i think i would have been smoking crack instead of working out.
It's a good thing he has a redeeming and humble personality with no need to continuously try making people like him despite his horrendous voice, mediocre attempts at comedy and endless fame-whoring.
#18, you just made me laugh out loud, so thank you. =) and yes Patrick, it was before the surprise, although I almost wish it was after so I could entertain myself and "praise" his new physique midfuck, which would have likely incited him to pause, flex, and continue. Lol that guy was such a trip
He's a musician (and a very good one). Why do you people think you have a right to weigh in on his personal life. Even more, why do you care about it so much?
#15 you're a skank! Who gives a fuck that your giving up your seemingly worthless twat to some guy it took you months to figure out he was self centered, narcissistic and cheap. Either your not so bright or think very little of yourself or both. I mean why shouldn't he give you a gift of schlong then bang you every which way? Your the one giving it up. I mean that's classic. As a matter of fact I think I read your ex-boyfriends book..."How To Bang a Bimbo on Her Birthday Giving The Gift of Cock"
What's up with the every-other day or every-third day posts? God, I know you have a life of your own, but I have work I am trying to avoid over here by spending time on your site. Your self-demening, quasi-racist, extremely sexist posts are a much needed break in an otherwise boring workday. They are like a mint is to bad breath. So be a dear, and post multiple entries daily m-kay? And what ever happened to Michelle? She wasn't great, but it takes time to develop into a cut-throat witty writer like you are. Just goes to show though, if you want something done right, you have to write it and post it yourself.
Yes... the gift of cock. Too funny. Why not give some pathetic "I've got my needs too" ho the gift of me and my oversized cock. #15 talks about midfucking cause she just a durty gurl! What decent looking successful man in his right mind would ever spend money on a real, tangible gift like a time piece or handbag for some "I think so little of myself" slit. I mean best I;d do for #15 is take her on a trip to Vegas cause she'd be thinking how great I am by spending time and money and entertainment on her but the reality is I get to fuck her every which way and in the ass in the hotel room I just rented. So in the long run after taking pictures of her spread eagle across my bed it was worth it... and my friends who like the pics think so too. So the gift of me and my cock is just what some women are worth...aaaahh nuuuumba fifteeeen. lol
Jessica TOLD Nick Lachey they were geting a divorce or her father sent the message.Nick Lachey was the best man for her and she threw him away.John Mayar and Tony hit it and left it.
She seems to want things from men who don't want the same thing.If she had stayed with Nick,they would be on baby#2 now,and she would have had way better pr.
Totally agree, Mayer is a douche. Granted, he is famous and wealthy and all...but that doesn't excuse you from being a total camera douche hound that tries to be funny and witty all the time but fail miserably.
i can't believe they are bringing up John when she just got dumped by Romo, whom she was with for 2 years. wtf, maybe its papa joe trying to keep her name out there.
Toddles? What happened to the new girl? Did another one bite the dust? I'd check the last weeks' comments but I can't be bothered. They make my intimidating beaner burrito look pitiful.
P.S. John Mayer is indeed a douchetard. I can't wait for the paternity test 411 to show up soon.
40 Comments:
Leave Your CommentHey i have given women my playlists... Just saying
By burntfinger, on July 20, 2009 06:08:40
It's really hard to please a stupido country ho' but he tried.
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 06:46:44
It's good thing they didn't have a child together, because it would have been a stupid douche.
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 06:46:56
JSimp used to be so hot. It shows how low she's gone.
By jtg, on July 20, 2009 06:56:26
wow #3.... did you think of that one all by yourself...
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 07:23:22
Not sure the penis picture sending thing is a good idea. I did that a few times, but the last fucking time I did, my g/f's mom answered the phone. Imagine how embarrassed I was showing up at her parents' house two days later.
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 07:43:27
Did she deserve any more? There's a bigger talent disparity between the two than Jessica and her twat sister.
By KingPong, on July 20, 2009 08:06:13
Wow, telling all our secrets, huh? lol :)
By Chantelle, on July 20, 2009 08:08:33
Don't send photos of your penis to any person. They can be used against you later in court. And those ignorant people won't understand. They're so ignorant!
By Michael J., on July 20, 2009 08:35:24
Remember when Meyer wrote Jennifer Aniston a song for her birthday?
Cheapest. Bastard. EVER.
By Patrick, on July 20, 2009 09:31:14
John Mayer just needs a couple of Michael Jackson's doctors.
Step up to the plate John, and see if you can do 15 vicodin a day. Don't be a wuss.
By J. Blount, on July 20, 2009 09:39:10
Todd, I really can't believe you have a girlfriend that let's you write all the shit you do, haha
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 09:51:29
Todd-
If you added special effects and pyrotechnics to back up your weiner maybe you would have a shot at Megan Fox?
By E. Kneival, on July 20, 2009 09:52:35
Damn
By Wishes I Was Chantelle....., on July 20, 2009 09:53:52
I can top this. For the two months prior to my birthday this year, I was dating this guy we'll call F. F was hot, fun, successful, etc. In the month before my birthday, he got a DUI while I was in the car, and I bailed him out of jail, and later testified in court on his behalf so that he was later found not-guilty. Because of this, and our growing relationship, I expected at least dinner or something for my birthday...yeah not so much. On my birthday, F kept telling me he had a special surprise and I would love it...I was getting increasingly excited. I asked him all day to tell me what it was, and to give me clues, and finally he relented, and told me he'd tell me. "ok," I asked excitedly, "what is my birthday present/surprise, and where can I find it?" "Baaaaabe," he replied, "I've been WORKING OUT!" Yeah, needless to say, the last time we slept together was ON MY BIRTHDAY. Douche.
By the only positive of this was that it made for joke fodder for the next 3 weeks, on July 20, 2009 10:43:07
#15, please tell me you boinked him BEFORE he told you the surprise....
By Patrick, on July 20, 2009 11:18:45
Really if the guy can ride this shit out looking like a cross breed of Willim Dafoe and Eddie Munster than more power to him. I mean he must have something going for him as he's bangin' some Tinseltown elite. Ya I'm no fan but I can appreciate a guy who looks like he smells like ass crack gettin' one over on some pretty decent snatch. Love the game... love the playa.... playa
By jonnysheen, on July 20, 2009 11:24:07
Now mens #15 done show you how the womenz do believe the shizzle we done say. Just don't be getting one that be packin'. Word.
By S. MCNAIR, on July 20, 2009 11:55:56
#18 WTF are you for real? or just some dueling banjo back country in bred homo makin it look like allyall sista girls are as illiterate as the stereotype goes..... Damn gurl... you go! Don't let thems folks do that to you. We alls better'n that!
By Trailer made , on July 20, 2009 12:13:25
Am I the only one who thinks he's hideous?
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 12:32:22
#15,,, Thanks for the insight, ( now we can all move on ) .
Fuck if i was guy dating you, i think i would have been smoking crack instead of working out.
By burntfinger, on July 20, 2009 12:50:42
John Mayer Is A Douche
Like most musicians, especially guitar players.
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 12:51:09
#20, no, no you certainly aren't alone.
It's a good thing he has a redeeming and humble personality with no need to continuously try making people like him despite his horrendous voice, mediocre attempts at comedy and endless fame-whoring.
. . . oh, wait.
By some broad, on July 20, 2009 13:12:00
Jesus thats Cheep!
By The English & Dutch, on July 20, 2009 13:46:24
@#19- Unlike you I done had all my teeth, but that biatch had good aim!
By MCNAIR, on July 20, 2009 14:35:31
#25 LOL
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 14:58:40
Why was this imbecile playing at Jackson's "memorial"?
Oh, wait..
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 17:49:30
I'm as straight as can be but I'd let him rub his penis all over me after he's taken a dip in Jennifer Aniston.
By anonymous, on July 20, 2009 19:45:37
#18, you just made me laugh out loud, so thank you. =) and yes Patrick, it was before the surprise, although I almost wish it was after so I could entertain myself and "praise" his new physique midfuck, which would have likely incited him to pause, flex, and continue. Lol that guy was such a trip
By Still looks better naked, on July 20, 2009 19:46:34
He's a musician (and a very good one). Why do you people think you have a right to weigh in on his personal life. Even more, why do you care about it so much?
xTomx
By anonymous, on July 21, 2009 04:22:45
#15 you're a skank! Who gives a fuck that your giving up your seemingly worthless twat to some guy it took you months to figure out he was self centered, narcissistic and cheap. Either your not so bright or think very little of yourself or both. I mean why shouldn't he give you a gift of schlong then bang you every which way? Your the one giving it up. I mean that's classic. As a matter of fact I think I read your ex-boyfriends book..."How To Bang a Bimbo on Her Birthday Giving The Gift of Cock"
By anonymous, on July 21, 2009 05:47:59
What's up with the every-other day or every-third day posts? God, I know you have a life of your own, but I have work I am trying to avoid over here by spending time on your site. Your self-demening, quasi-racist, extremely sexist posts are a much needed break in an otherwise boring workday. They are like a mint is to bad breath. So be a dear, and post multiple entries daily m-kay? And what ever happened to Michelle? She wasn't great, but it takes time to develop into a cut-throat witty writer like you are. Just goes to show though, if you want something done right, you have to write it and post it yourself.
By Viking Girl, on July 21, 2009 10:49:31
Jess should have never left Nick. No one else will ever take her seriously.
By anonymous, on July 21, 2009 11:17:54
Give the gift of cock.
By anonymous, on July 21, 2009 11:20:11
Yes... the gift of cock. Too funny. Why not give some pathetic "I've got my needs too" ho the gift of me and my oversized cock. #15 talks about midfucking cause she just a durty gurl! What decent looking successful man in his right mind would ever spend money on a real, tangible gift like a time piece or handbag for some "I think so little of myself" slit. I mean best I;d do for #15 is take her on a trip to Vegas cause she'd be thinking how great I am by spending time and money and entertainment on her but the reality is I get to fuck her every which way and in the ass in the hotel room I just rented. So in the long run after taking pictures of her spread eagle across my bed it was worth it... and my friends who like the pics think so too. So the gift of me and my cock is just what some women are worth...aaaahh nuuuumba fifteeeen. lol
By anonymous, on July 21, 2009 13:41:55
DAMN..........
Jess looks good enough to EAT in those Pics!
Oh yeah......... He's a Douche
By BukkNekkid , on July 21, 2009 15:14:08
Jessica TOLD Nick Lachey they were geting a divorce or her father sent the message.Nick Lachey was the best man for her and she threw him away.John Mayar and Tony hit it and left it.
She seems to want things from men who don't want the same thing.If she had stayed with Nick,they would be on baby#2 now,and she would have had way better pr.
By Goes around comes around, on July 21, 2009 18:41:00
Totally agree, Mayer is a douche. Granted, he is famous and wealthy and all...but that doesn't excuse you from being a total camera douche hound that tries to be funny and witty all the time but fail miserably.
By Dave Matthews, on July 21, 2009 19:22:49
i can't believe they are bringing up John when she just got dumped by Romo, whom she was with for 2 years. wtf, maybe its papa joe trying to keep her name out there.
By hates hollywood, on July 21, 2009 21:54:08
Toddles? What happened to the new girl? Did another one bite the dust? I'd check the last weeks' comments but I can't be bothered. They make my intimidating beaner burrito look pitiful.
P.S. John Mayer is indeed a douchetard. I can't wait for the paternity test 411 to show up soon.
By cinco, on July 21, 2009 23:04:51
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