Tom Sizemore went bankrupt and decided it would be a good idea to create a porn site featuring him having sex with random people. I know most of you are already members of XXXTom.com and you're familiar with this story, so sorry to insult your intelligence. He also has a tape called The Tom Sizemore Sex Scandal and it includes an interview with him in which he boasts about a one night stand he had with Paris Hilton when she was 19 and "begged" him for sex after a party. In a recent interview with The Scoop Paris Hilton was quoted as saying,

It's disappointing that Mr. Sizemore has to use my name to sell his DVDs. He is not an acquaintance of mine, nor have I ever had intimate relations with him."

No, no, no. That was not a Paris Hilton quote. She's not like the toys in Toy Story who come to life when humans leave the room. And she would never use words like "acquaintance", "nor", "intimate" or "relations". Those are, like, five dollar words in Paris Land, so it's, like, really cheap and she'd totally pay some really, really smart and hot person to say them for her and then have sex with them like she did with Tom Sizemore.



Related entries:
Paris Hilton is a class act
Paris Hilton's boyfriend is an idiot

Kirsten Dunst is sparking rumors that she's an alcoholic after a recent appearance on Jay Leno and she made an ass out of herself at the New York premiere of Elizabethtown.

The stunning actress [fanged she-beast] is alleged to have arrived on the red-carpet of the New York premiere looking "dishevelled" before drinking herself into an aggressive stupour at the exclusive post screening bash. According to one fellow reveller, who was quoted by America's New York Post newspaper, Dunst was "drinking a lot and got very loud and obnoxious. She was very pushy."

She told American talk show host Jay Leno: "I stock up on Veuve Cliquot champagne. I buy it from Costco - cheap there I have lots of alcohol and no food in my fridge". When asked by Leno whether she was worried about her drinking habits, the screen beauty added: "Well, maybe in a few months you will see me in a rehab clinic."

This may support the theory that Kirsten's baseless conceit is a result of regular consumption of massive amounts of alcohol. It would seem there is no way she can watch her horrible movies or look at herself in the mirror whilst sober and think she has genuine talent or any measurable amount of sexiness. It would most certainly take drinking a fridge full of champagne (and a guy with knife on my throat) to get me to say those things about her.

Here she is a couple days ago at the German premiere of Elizabethtown. I would have posted the whole set, but I don't want Grendel's daughter sucking up all my bandwidth.



Thanks to Jason, Dave and Jon for the heads up.

Related entries:
These reviews are not good
Kirsten Dunst is a self important bitch
Kirsten Dunst is unbelievably stupid
Kirsten Dunst means "horrible stench" in Danish

Here's Tara Reid leaving the Starz party at LAX in Hollywood a couple nights ago. There's really no news here other than the fact that she's out partying even though she says anyone who calls her a drunken party girl is a big, mean liar. She doesn't look like her typical sloppy, stumbling self as she usually does when entering or leaving a party, club or church. But those giant pupils of hers didn't seem to react to the lights and flashbulbs. I'm not accusing her of being high. I'm just saying she's probably high.



Related entries:
Tara Reid is in the zone
Tara Reid is drunk
Tara Reid's drunken shame, part II
Tara Reid is awesome

• Halle Berry: A foot worshipper's dream [Hollywood Tuna]
  
• Family Guy: Peter and the boys sing some Journey [Gorilla Mask]
• Say hello to Sean Preston Federline [A Socialite's Life]
• Famous episode when a guy beat Press Your Luck [Smit Happens]
• Has Daryl Hannah had face work? [CityRag]
• Emanuelle Chiriqui nipple slip pictures [Egotastic!]
• I've always wondered what Nicole Richie's nipple looked like. For academic reasons, of course. [College Humor]
• Mary-Kate Olsen: from hobo to homeless [Perez Hilton]
• Brandon Davis has a new girlfriend [Just Jared]

I ran into an unrated clip of a sex scene between Antonio Banderas and Angelina Jolie from the movie Original Sin, so I decided it would be best to share it with you. This is probably the closest we'll get to seeing Angelina Jolie have real sex unless the wishes I make when blowing out birthday candles, seeing falling stars and pulling wings off of butterflies come true and one of her home movies finally surfaces.

The words "unrated" and "sex scene" should be enough of to hint that this scene is very graphic, very naked and very hot, but I'll go ahead and add a very NSFW anyway.

Update: Not surprisingly, there are a lot of people who want to see Angie simulate hardcore sex. so I'm redirecting the link to Megaupload so my server bill doesn't put me in a homeless shelter or grave ... whichever comes first.

Click here to see the unrated clip from Original Sin
The file is 28MB, so it might take a little time to download, but it's worth the wait.

Handbag.com is reporting that Rush Limbaugh has intricate knowledge of U2's frontman Bono's sexual behavior.

While discussing a list of "ubersexuals" put out by an advertising agency, Limbaugh cited Pierce Brosnan, Jon Stewart, Donald Trump, Bill Clinton and Bono as making the list - and then said that the Irish rocker has a mistress.

When a caller on Limbaugh's show asked what basis the host had for his accusation, he replied, "You people are just going to have to trust me on this."

When I met Bono years ago, I didn't catch a lecherous vibe from the guy, which I figured meant he was either gay, or not into middle school chicks. Either way, his beard (I mean wife) didn't seem to mind much when he brought me back to their hotel room so he could get my opinion on which sequined cowboy hat and shiny shirt went best with his giant Jackie-O sunglasses. Then he gave me his autograph on a Liza Minnelli photo and sent me on my merry way.


Thanks to Bobby for the link.

Christina Aguilera is set to marry Jordan Bratman this winter and already sold the exclusive rights to her wedding photos to People magazine for $665,000. I love how no matter what she does lately, Britney Spears ends up looking cheap and tacky when compared to Christina Aguilera ... even when Christina is wearing see through clothes and selling her photos cheap.

Here are some pictures of Christina on a recent trip to a recording studio where she's working on a new album. You may have noticed she's not carrying junk food and a six foot tall, cornrowed parasite because you're observant and that's why I like you.



Related entries:
Christina's voice is like buttah

• Male celebrities' ... ahem ... package sizes [via Bulgereport.com]
• Kimberly Stewart picking her non-butt
• The sad decline of celebrity
• Kate Moss shuns Pete Doherty
• Tom Cruise's British Boswell [Radar Online]
• Who is Rachel Bilson dating?
• More Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston

And, finally, here's the first photo which has surfaced of Heidi Klum and Seal's brand new baby. And I know what you meanies are thinking, so just zip it. The poor thing was just barely yanked out of that beautiful woman, so give the poor kid a chance to de-wrinkle.