IDontLikeYouInThatWay.com: Archives 05-2006

Katie Holmes Has Escaped. Almost.

Katie Holmes has returned to Ohio to introduce two month old, Suri, to family and friends - without Tom Cruise. Life & Style Weekly is reporting that the couple reportedly had a heated argument that led Katie to go to Ohio and reconsider her relationship with Cruise. A source says:

He told Katie he wasn't going, considering the bad relations between him and her family. Katie was really happy he said that, because she'd been afraid to admit to him that she didn't want him to go. The couple allegedly had a "huge argument" which ended with Katie declaring, "I'm doing this and you can't stop me." Katie's very unhappy and beginning to realize she may have made a major mistake being with Tom."

What some people may not know is that Cruise is reportedly worth $460 million and Holmes and Cruise have a prenuptial agreement worth $40 million. A trust of $15 million has been set aside for Katie and Suri whether she marries Tom or not. If they marry and get divorced, Katie gets another $25 million. That being said, I'm really not sure what Katie is waiting for at this point. $25 million only seems like a lot of money when you don't already have $15 million. For $15 million, I'd have sex with Tom Cruise. I'm not greedy, I don't need the whole $40 million. Just enough to get my bills straight.

Source

posted by Todd on Wed, May 24, 2006 | | |

posted by Jenny on Wed, May 24, 2006 | | |

Bai Ling Slips a Nip. Again.

Bai Ling is naked or almost naked most of the time, so seeing a nipple slip from her is never a surprise, or really all that exciting. At this point she could be standing naked in a grocery store and someone could say, "Hey, check out the naked girl over there!" and the only responses would be, "Where? Behind Bai Ling?" But here she and her ubiquitous nipples are at Cannes promoting another movie I won't watch. And, yes, those stupid sleeves serve a purpose. They act as flotation devices ~~when I push her off~~ if she falls off the boat.

Most of these are NSFW, even though since it's Bai Ling, it shouldn't count:

posted by Jenny on Wed, May 24, 2006 | | |

Michelle Rodriguez Is Back In Jail

Michelle Rodriguez must serve 60 days in a Los Angeles jail for violating her parole with her drunk driving arrest in Hawaii last December. The arrest violated the three year probation term she was given in 2004 after pleading no contest to charges of hit and run, driving with a suspended license and driving under the influence of alcohol. In addition to jail time, which is scheduled to begin May 31, Rodriguez must attend an alcohol education program and was sentenced to 30 days of community service with the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department, MADD victim impact panel and the city's hospital and morgue program. Her probation on these charges has been extended to 2009.

Okay, I'll admit, Michelle Rodriguez is cute, in the same way that a pit bull is cute. Every guy kind of secretly wants to pet both of them, but they know there's a good chance they'll probably get attacked and mauled. The only difference is that I'd rather get a ride home from a pit bull. Maybe a Kennedy if time was really an issue.

Source

posted by Todd on Tue, May 23, 2006 | | |

Avril Lavigne is at Cannes

The necktie and high top look is okay if you plan on being the toughest one at Kindercare, but someone should pull Avril Lavigne to the side and tell her she is only allowed to dress like this. Mostly because I never knew she had that rack. I haven't been this pleasantly surprised since I found out that the McRib was back.

posted by Todd on Tue, May 23, 2006 | | |

While You Were Praying...

Satan and my demonic 8th grade Geography teacher had sex, and they spawned Elizabeth Hurley and Sienna Miller. Here they both are over the weekend. They're equally evil creatures, but at least one of them knows how to wear clothes which make me forget for a minute how much I can't stand her...

Then there's this one...

Mr. T in a Hefty bag, leggings and Top Gun shades. Lovely. Sienna, you're not eccentric, or cool with this crap the way say ... Diane Keaton is. You're ridiculous and these clothes are a cry for help. And by "help" I mean almost no one knows who you are or cares, so you should probably just go into porn. Wait, isn't that a song? "Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I'm gonna go and do porn..." Aw, man I miss my mom's lullabies.

posted by Jenny on Tue, May 23, 2006 | | |

Link My Way Back Home When I Learn To Fly

Kirsten Dunst is a bikini clad nightmare [Hollywood Rag]
Charlotte Church is getting a piece this hot rugby player [Just Jared]
Fran Drescher tells Howard Stern she wants to go into politics [City Rag]
Halle Berry is boobalicious [Hollywood Tuna]
Sandra Bullock stole my future husband (and has a stalker) [A Socialite's Life]
Mischa Barton loves that old man smell [Egotastic]
Tori Spelling tries too hard [Popsugar]
Britney Spears is too broke for Kabbalah [D Listed]
Lindsay Lohan's "fire crotch" responds! [Best Week Ever]
This is, like the Skeletal System (starring Nicole Richie) [Gallery of the Absurd]

The Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain covers Nirvana [College Humor]

posted by Jenny on Tue, May 23, 2006 | | |

Pete Wentz is Has a Tool

I don't listen to Fall Out Boy for the same reasons I don't use a machete to clean my ears, so I don't know too much about them other than a little scandal surrounding one of their members, Pete "Petey" Wentz, because his cell phone was hacked a few months ago and pictures of him playing with his penis ended up published all over the Internet. He was understandably embarrassed and posted a message to his fans on his Internet journal which read as follows:

[blah, blah, blah, some emo crybaby garbage] the moral of the story: if you really dont want pictures of yourself to end up on the internet. dont take the pictures. [blah, blah, blah, incoherent crap]"

Yesterday, he sent the following email to two guys with more "racy" pictures attached:

-----Original Message-----
To: adam@fueledbyramen.com, nicholas.scimeca@friendsorenemies.com
Subject: NEW PIX!
From: Petey Wentz
Date: Mon, 22 May 2006 12:37:32

hey guys.. i took some more pics. let me know what you think.

DON'T LET THESE GET OUT TO ANYONE!

p.s. the new hush sound cd rules

--peteywentz"

Clearly he intended for these to get out so he could help push the sales of that CD he's rubbing on his junk, so I'm just going to finish this post by saying it's okay Pete is gay, and he's trying to get his gay fans to buy that other gay band's CD by doing gay poses in these pictures. And if all of this wasn't enough proof that Petey is gay, then his gay tattoos and gay hoodie sweatshirt should really bring the point home. And if that still wasn't enough for you, his gay purple underwear match his gay purple hoodie. His wallpaper is pretty gay, too, now that I think of it.

Here are the pictures from yesterday's email: