Demi Moore Might Be Pregnant


Here are Demi "I Spent 3.8 Fillion Dollars On Plastic Surgery" Moore and that screechy 10 year old at some book party snorehole yesterday. Yeah, blah blah, I don't give a shit either, except this chick normally doesn't dress like this. Any movie role she has might as well include double fisting at this point to keep anyone from (literally) dying of boredom, but here she is in this black curtain all of a sudden. Is she pregnant? I don't know. But what I do know is that I made a bad move when I turned down replacing Bruce Willis in the new Die Hard whatever number it is. I'm not bald and I don't have balls, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn last night.


Note: Oprah will help pimp Laura Day's book later this month, OMG!!

Bruce Willis is a Pimp


Bruce Willis, 52, is now dating Playboy Playmate Tamara Witmer, 23 (which makes her only 5 years older than Willis' daughter, Rumer), after the two met at the Peninsula Hotel in Los Angeles. The New York Daily News reports:

...She admits being "a little nervous" when she recently met the "Die Hard" star...That was after they got to know each other over the phone. "He's got the sexiest voice!" she says. "He's so smooth and suave. I don't mind the bald head. He's really good looking in person."

Jesus, Bruce Willis' penis should be dipped in gold and put in some sort of museum because ever since he and Demi Moore broke up, it's seen more 20 year old kitty than the Sultan of Brunei. It seems like every time you turn around he's rolling off a model or wiping off some actress. Meanwhile, Ashton Kutcher is only 29 and his wife has had more work done than the Millennium Falcon. Score!


Update: Bruce Willis is 2x a pimp now because of this:

Bruce Willis is fed up with listening to outspoken actors - and believes their opinion shouldn't mean "jack shit" to the general public. The Die Hard star understands some of his colleagues want to do good for various causes, but wishes others would keep their thoughts to themselves. He says, "I don't think my opinion means jack shit, because I'm an actor. "Why do actors think their opinions mean more because you act? You just caught a break as an actor. There are hundreds - thousands - of actors who are just as good as I am, and probably better. "Have you heard anything useful come out of an actor's mouth lately?" He adds, "Although I liked George Clooney's documentary on Darfur."