Ice-T and Coco renewed their vows this week. These apparently included "I promise to always dress like a whore that rolled around in Cheeto crumbs."

Coco is back on Twitter again, and surprise, she tweeted a picture of her unfortunate ass. This thing looks like an out of control tumor, not something I want to stick my dick in. If I can use a boulder and your thong in a castle siege, your ass might be too big. Just sayin'.

Thankfully Twitter was created so people like Coco can achieve their daily attention-whoregasm without having to call the paparazzi.

I've excepted that I'm the "Twitter Pic" and "Thong Thursday" Queen! Whats the world come too!U like? http://plixi.com/p/47978964

Seeing as Halloween is right around the corner and Coco's ass looks like it just set the record for largest pumpkin at the county fair, it's only fitting if someone guts her, carves a toothy grin, and sticks a tea light in her. And this year instead of candy, I'll be buying her a dictionary. "I've excepted"? and "what's this world come too"? Really??

You can see Coco's ass from Google Earth, so it's unclear why she would stick her...wait for it...comically oversized ass directly in front of a camera and take a picture. Oh, I know. It's Coco. She honestly believes she has the greatest ass in the world, although there's a good chance Eskimos could use it for fuel. Sorry if it makes me gay for not wanting to hit this, but I shouldn't have to be Inspector Gadget to get my dick past the ten inches of ass cheek. Plus, I'm convinced her ass is like some ghetto Stargate, where if I had sex with it, I'd be transported to some Detroit version of Pandora where I'd have to compete in a step show to save a tree that gives out payday loans.

Yesterday was a day that ended in "Y", so that means Coco tweeted a picture of her ass again. This time in a thong. A thong that I assume was once used to lower supplies to trapped coal miners or for midget bungee jumping. I hate to tell Coco how to use her celebrity, but if ESPN ever has an elephant hogtying competition, maybe Coco could donate some stuff she doesn't wear anymore.

Fifteen minutes ago, in her race to put as many pics of her enormous ass online, Coco posted this pic on her Twitter.

Booty short candid shot! In hotel room getting ready for Prince Albert's Party at the Monaco Palace.

I bet Prince Albert is singing around a table into a hairbrush because he's so giddy that this level of class is coming to his party. Is her job to pass out the Black & Milds? I don't get it. Or maybe they're having some kind of reenactment and reanimated WWII soldiers have to fight their way over her ass to take a bunker. Whatever it is, it can't be good.

Coco will not stop until you see every plastic piece of her from every possible angle, so as you might have imagined, she posted more pics of herself on Twitter. The pic below is supposed to be her sister, but I'm not really sure. I mean, are they twins or is she just the discontinued model?

Coco posted this picture on Twitter with the caption: "Hangin w my twin nieces. Daisy just loves my boobs. She likes putting her head in between them." Sorry, Daisy. It's pretty much all downhill from here.