AZO Urine Orange and Oil Change Sludge are the colors we chose for Tila's sexy hair, in case you were wondering.

Signed,

Tila Tequila's Super Awesome Hair Team

xoxo<3liekomgones111andexcumashunpoyntz

Fame whores who make staged picture deals with paparazzi agencies are pathetic. However, when said whores are people who look like this ... that is beyond pathetic. Here we have two fake lesbians pretending to be fucking each other everywhere so we'll talk about them. And, oh yeah, I'll talk about them. "Tila Tequila," you look like a 12 year old ladyboy who turns every heterosexual hard dick limp on accidental porn searches. Couuuretehnhay Shemale, you look like you snort with every breath because your mouth is so fucked up from veneers, braces, and whatever the hell else your daddy did with his billions to try and fail at making you less ugly. Regardless, here are some super hot lesbian pics! Vomit bags are available in the seat pocket in front of you.

You remember the rumor last year that Lindsay Lohan was doing the daughter of Yahoo! CEO, Terry Semel, Courtenay Semel? Want to take a guess if that was true? I know! Brace yourself! News of The World says:

Lindsay now does little to disguise the tenderness of her relationship with British DJ Samantha Ronson-but this is only after months of covert gay experiments with stunning brunette Courtenay Semel. "Everyone thinks Samantha is Lindsay's first lesbian love, but we were very passionate until her fear of being found out drove us apart," Courtenay told a pal. "At the time she was terrified her career would be over if she revealed her sexual tendencies. But then Samantha came on to the scene and I was dropped." [Lindsay] bedded a string of men in a bid to suppress her lesbian urges - and to hide them from her public...Courtenay's pal explained: "She met Lindsay in the summer of 2006 at a party in Malibu. From the start Lindsay was very confused about her feelings for Courtenay so did more and more drugs to stifle the sexual attraction she was experiencing. But eventually she just gave in and at every party they'd kiss and touch each other in the corner. It's a miracle nobody found out. Both of them would do lines of cocaine in the toilets then head home and fall into bed together."

At this point, it's hard to even tell if Lindsay Lohan is gay or straight anymore. She'll fuck anything. I get the feeling that if Courtenay Semel had been a bear or a robot (or better yet, a robot bear) Lindsay would've probably still hit that shit.

Lindsay and Samantha shopping in Hollywood on Friday:


Photos: Splash