May I present Tania Zaetta, a nice C-list Australian celebrity who has a body carved out of coco-butter. Sure, I could tell you that Zaetta was on Baywatch in 1999, or that she starred in a Bollywood film since then, but all that really matters is that she was on Australia's Dancing With The Stars and was the first person voted off. And if they let people like Steve-O on that show in this country, imagine how a country founded by criminals and rapists selects their reality royalty.

If you answer was: just put the attractive ones on TV, I think you're right.

Marie Osmond collapsed on live television last night after she performed a samba routine on the ABC show, Dancing with the Stars. Apparently she just stopped breathing and passed out. I can't tell what drugs she's on at the beginning, but I'd kinda like to know. She looks like she passed out pretty easy. Something has to work better than this belt.