The actual heroes CNN saluted were all pretty unattractive, but the guests were decent.

In Jessica Alba's case, extremely bangin'. I hear she's a hero to screenwriters everywhere.



Annalynne McCord looks like the Crypt Keeper, but she's a PR hero for convincing the brass on 90210 that she's the hot breakout star.



Demi Moore is a hero for cougars and plastic surgeons:



Emmy Rossum is a hero for girls who want to stay relevant by dating and dumping trolls.



John Legend and his lady, Christy Teigen, are heroes because she tweets us and he reads us.



I don't know who Shay Mitchell is, so I'll say she's a hero because she's Mulan:



And as for the banner picture, Gerard Butler is a hero for Sparta. And for my vagina.

Actress Emmy Rossum, who sort of looks like Angelina Jolie's sister with down syndrome, is getting divorced after her husband, Justin Siegel (this handsome devil), filed citing irreconcilable differences. People reports:

Siegel cites irreconcilable differences and seeks spousal support from Rossum, 23, according to the Sept. 25 filing in Los Angeles Superior Court. The couple had no children. Although no date of separation is listed on the divorce filing, a source says the pair split in August.

She's reportedly dating Counting Crows frontthing, Adam Duritz, so try not to get too excited. Emmy is a 23-year old chick who seems to only date dopey, middle-age, white Jewish guys. So basically, if she was in a comic book, she would be the arch enemy of Kim Kardashian. And her special powers would be the ability to smell cocoa butter and hear dice games over great distances. Or something like that. That may have been racist. Who knows. What am I, a writer all of a sudden?

Some people might not agree, but Emmy Rossum kinda looks like Angelina Jolie's little sister. And although she's really pretty, she'll always not feel good enough because, to reiterate, she'd be Angelina Jolie's sister and no matter how many times you'd tell her how hot she was, she'd always feel the need to overcompensate by letting guys do things to her that would make her father cry and her doctor concerned because of her crater-sized insecurities and need for acceptance. I don't know how I got all that from these pictures of her sucking on ice cream, but I guess what I'm really trying say is hey Emmy. Call me.