After a perfect 16-0 regular season, the New England Patriots lost 17-14 to the New York Giants last night in Super Bowl XLII. So I guess that means Gisele Bundchen needs to get naked. The Sportsman's Daily (satire) reports:

In the aftermath of their 21-12 victory over the San Diego Chargers, Tom Brady's celebrated girlfriend startled onlookers by promising to run naked down Broadway in the unlikely event the Patriots lose to the Arizona-bound N.Y. Giants -- unlikely until the very moment she parted her full lips and made the surprise announcement."

Just so we're clear, a naked Victoria's Secret model running down the street will never happen. Never. Just like with everything else involving the Patriots this weekend, it'll just turn out to be hype and a fucking tease. Wow, it must suck living in Foxboro today. An artists' rendition of New England Patriots' fans include a plane crashed into a side of a barn and a cat with a bowl of spaghetti on its head.

Victoria's Secret Super Bowl stuff:

Fergie the tranny does Thailand and fits right in [Hollywood Rag]
Birds love the Backstreet Boys [College Humor]
Heidi and Spencer almost died in a fire [Dlisted]
Vince Vaughn and Vanessa Williams might be dating [ASL]
Bill Maher has stupid audience members [Popoholic]
Lucy Pinder still has giant boobs [Hollywood Tuna]
Kid Rock's mugshots all look alike [City Rag]
Tom Cruise is still short and creepy [Just Jared]
Kim Kardashian blows (NSFW ads) [Drunken Stepfather]
Jennifer Lopez is still pregnant [Popsugar]
Megan Fox gets a Spike Scream [Egotastic]
Melissa Joan Hart has boobies [Taxi Driver Movie]
Nikki Belucci in lingerie [Horny Oyster]

Gisele Bundchen (and Tom Brady?) in Miami Beach, October 22:

Her boyfriend, Tom Brady, was in town to play the Dolphins, so here's Gisele Bundchen in a tiny bikini in Miami on Saturday. Say what you want about her face, but damn she has a sick body. I don't know what I'd do if I saw a Victoria's Secret model at the beach. In my mind, my eyes would pop of my head, smoke would shoot out my ears, and my bow tie would spin around really fast like I was a cartoon wolf, but the pictures would later reveal that I just had my hands down my pants and a towel over my lap.

Gisele Bundchen has cut ties with Victoria's Secret after the lingerie company refused to pay her requested salary of $5 million a year. A source says:

Her demands were outrageous. She got a new lawyer who was unrealistic," said a source. "Victoria's Secret doesn't care. They have five new hotter, younger girls debuting next year. And they won't have to deal with any craziness."

Gisele kinda looks like a man, so I probably wouldn't have given her $5 million either. Especially with the insanely hot Alessandra Ambrosio set to be the company's new breakout star. In a related story, I was forced out of the western wear modeling world by jealously and deceit. Apparently my lavender assless chaps intimidated some people.


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Less than a month after his former girlfriend, Bridget Moynahan, revealed she was three months pregnant with his child, Tom Brady's current girlfriend, supermodel Gisele Bundchen, is now rumored to be pregnant with the Patriots superstar's baby:

...Bundchen would be no more than two months pregnant, but may already have told select friends and family. The brief item was written by Joyce Pascowitch , who's the Brazilian equivalent of the New York Post's Richard Johnson. Brady's agent Don Yee did not return a phone call yesterday, and Bundchen's rep at IMG denied the report..."

Some guys think having two kids a month apart by two different women is cool, but not me. Not to brag, but I prefer committing to the lovely lady and accepting my responsibility. Only after she has the baby do I change my name and move out of state. I like to move about once a year, so this kinda works out for me.


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Labels: bridget moynahan, gisele bundchen, tom brady