Lindsay Lohan is big boobed (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Ashley Tisdale ugly watch (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]
Diddy is a retard [Just Jared]
Angelina Jolie got a tummy tuck [Hollywood Rag]
Carmen Electra is old news [Hollywood Tuna]
Jennifer Garner is still pregnant [Popsugar]
The Olsen Twins refuse to grow up [City Rag]
Suri Cruise runs! [Dlisted]
Shannen Doherty does Details magazine [Popoholic]
Hugh Hefner confirms what we already know [Socialite Life]
Courteney Cox admits she uses Botox [Lainey Gossip]
Scary Spice gets Photoshopped in her lingerie [Egotastic]

Hugh Hefner's new twin whores (click thumbnails for NSFW pics):

There have been a bunch of rumors lately that Holly Madison and Hugh Hefner's relationship was basically over, so good news if you were hoping that was true. Holly Madison confirmed it last night to a TMZ camera man. Everyone get prepared, because this 'reality television' breakup is gonna turn the celebrity gossip world upside down. In this job you read and see a lot of things, but a relationship between a 28 year old gold digger and a 82 year old millionaire close to death not working out? No way, man. Just no way.

Us Magazine reports that Hugh Hefner and Holly Madison are still together despite the fact that she has been seen everywhere with illusionist Criss Angel (the last time being four days ago). Some people are upset that people may question the love a vapid gold digger has for a rich man close to death. Hugh Hefner is not one of those people.

She is still my girlfriend," he tells Usmagazine.com in a new interview. "Now will that last? I don't think anything lasts forever. "I love her very much, but you know, she wants very much to get married and have children. That isn't very much in the cards for me," he adds. "So there has to be a certain reality there. And I'm sure the time will come when she'll be dating others. That's part of the transition."

Hugh Hefner then pointed to the line of blondes with fake tits and suitcases standing outside his house in front of a sign that says, "Please wait here to be transitioned."

It must be cool to live in the Playboy Mansion, because that would mean chicks come to your house just to get naked. Even when the chicks are kinda old, they still look like Cindy Margolis does here. It almost sounds like it would be as fun as my house. I mean, just yesterday, a black guy knocked on my door and explained to me that if I bought a magazine subscription, he could go to college. Woo hoo! That's right, baby! There's no telling who might show up next!

Hugh Hefner, 82, has revealed that he has constant lower back pain. Back pain not caused by not lifting with his legs or getting hit with a shovel, but from getting inside more teenage pussy than a stepfather. Stuff reports:

The 82-year-old Playboy tycoon - who lives with three girlfriends at the infamous Playboy mansion in Los Angeles - is renowned for his womanising ways, but says his bedroom activities have caused him health problems. He told FoxNews.com: "I have some aches and pains and I have had lower back problems since the 80s. Too much time in bed rustling around with friends!"

In related news, I just got a new Batman comforter for my bed. What can I say? Looks like Hugh Hefner and I are just livin' the dream!

Hef and his whores at Warren Beatty's AFI Life Achievement Award on June 12:


Photos: Splash

Los Angeles police are currently investigating an alleged sexual assault that took place inside the Playboy Mansion over the weekend. NY Daily News reports:

The investigation was launched Monday, according to a Los Angeles Police Department statement. "For reasons of law and confidentiality that are critical in such investigations, no additional information will be released," LAPD spokesman Jason Lee said. A message left with a Playboy spokesman was not immediately returned, and no details were immediately available."

Man, that sucks. I guess topping E!'s list of "Most Desirable Places to Commit Sexual Assaults" didn't help. I just don't know what E! is thinking sometimes.

Hugh Hefner's main ho, Holly Madison, wasn't helping those pregnancy rumors in Monaco last week when she reportedly passed on alcohol, wore loose clothes, and skipped fellow Girls Next Door castmate Kendra Wilkinson's 22nd birthday party. New York Daily News reports:

A Playboy rep assures us, "Holly is not pregnant, although she would like to be in the near future." The alpha bunny in Hef's hutch has gone so far as to let Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt know she can handle the breast-feeding herself. "I want to have kids with Hef in the next year or so," she told a journo. "When that happens, I just want it to be me and him."

As you can tell by the video below, Holly Madison's face had more work done on it than Ground Zero. Throw in the fact that the daddy looks like the mummy from Thundercats, and this may not be the best idea. In five years, this kid will come to Show and Tell with his mom's centerfold and a picture of his dad. Except the picture would've been taken with one of those cameras where the photographer has to put cloth over his head because the flash powder explodes and in the picture Hefner will be holding a musket and churning butter and whatever else they did when we was young.

Holly on June 12th:



Note: Yes, this dumbass is winking with both eyes.

After reading the June issue of Elle, which featured an interview with the Girls Next Door, Playboy Playmate, Kendra Wilkinson was reportedly furious after she saw that writer Daphne Merkin didn't sugarcoat the article. Page Six reports:

Wilkinson was hurt that she was described as "giving off a palpable air of anxiety." Merkin also quoted Wilkinson as saying her fake breasts were "my best investment" and said the blonde referred constantly to her "slight acne." "I'm very insecure right now about my face," Wilkinson told Merkin. "I get scared with Hef looking at me at the mansion and maybe thinking I'm ugly." Merkin also mentions Wilkinson's "fleeting attention span," her "dazed personality and limited vocabulary" and quotes Hefner describing Wilkinson's "distinctly unintellectual charm" by mockingly saying, "Books? What books?"

On an appearance on Larry King Live, Hefner promised to defend Kendra's honor.
Instead, he wrote this letter:

I just finished reading your article . . . and think it's the best, most perceptive piece on the show to date...I hope you get a chance to do a longer story for the New York Times or The New Yorker."

Hugh Hefner has been inside more 18 year old kitty than a frat boy, so I doubt he's worried about how Kendra might feel. Plus she's kinda dumb. And fug. If she wasn't in Playboy, she'd be the white stripper in the black strip club giving out handjobs for a shot of Grey Goose. A shot of Hennessey? Oh snap, she'll rock your world!

Kendra, beach, zit on stomach: