With years of getting hit with semen in the wrong place to make a baby behind her, Jenna Jameson is finally pregnant! Hurray! Page Six reports:

Congrats to Jenna Jameson. The retired porn queen is pregnant with the baby of her boyfriend, UFC champ Tito Ortiz. "She had a bunch of meetings and things planned for Fashion Week, including meetings for her own line, but she's postponed everything," said our source. "She's completely thrilled, this is something she's wanted for a very long time." Jameson miscarried during her marriage to Jay Grdina, whom she divorced in 2006. She also once failed with in vitro. Jameson's assistant didn't return calls and Ortiz's rep had no comment."

I only say hurray because you're supposed to be happy when somebody is pregnant, but it's gonna suck for this kid when he realizes his mom's vagina has been bombed out like Iraq and his dad looks he should be throwing barrels at Mario. There's also been much speculation about how the kid is going to be born. Jenna Jameson wants a natural birth. Whereas several doctors agree that "rappelling" might be the best option.

Jenna Jameson in Zombie Strippers:

Jessica Simpson has the look of desperation [Dlisted]
Hayden Panettiere's almost upskirt (NSFW ads) [Drunken Stepfather]
Anne Hathaway gave her co-star pink eye [Hollywood Rag]
Emmanuelle Chriqui is pretty in pink [Just Jared]
Nikki Cox has a new face [Hollywood Tuna]
Pete Wentz has an all black birthday [Popsugar]
Josh Groban smokes pot (?) [City Rag]
Mary-Kate Olsen is a sloppy mess [ASL]
Scary Spice is still gross [Egotastic]
A Man's Man Movie for a Man's Man (You Don't Mess with the Zohan) [Pajiba]
Aubrey O'Day has a see through dress (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]

Banner: Jenna Jameson booing her boyfriend's loss to Lyoto Machida. (Via SI)

Happy Friday, kids!

Blake Lively and Penn Badgley are humping [Dlisted]
Kate Beckinsale beach photos are disappointing [Hollywood Tuna]
Matthew McConaughey's brother gets a reality show [Just Jared]
Pete Wentz is a cunt (NSFW ads) [Drunken Stepfather]
Tara Reid shows off her ass cheek (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Courtney Love cries fraud [Hollywood Rag]
Kate Hudson has blue hair [Popsugar]
Petra Nemcova gets leggy at Cannes [Popoholic]
Tila Tequila is tranny looking trash [City Rag]
Kirsten Dunst lies about being a drunk [ASL]
Scary Spice is still scary and manly [Egotastic]
Beckham 70 Yard Goal [College Humor]

Jenna Jameson and Tito Ortiz this weekend in Las Vegas:


Photos: Splash

Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson might be fucking [Dlisted]
Jennifer Ellison topless in Nuts again [Hollywood Tuna]
Lindsay Lohan has a lesbian leech [Hollywood Rag]
Betty White kicks ass [City Rag]
Cameron Diaz and Matt Dillon might be fucking again [Popsugar]
Lindsay Lohan is a happy hippie [Just Jared]
Serena Williams looks like an unconvincing tranny (NSFW ads) [Drunken Stepfather]
Hayden Panettiere does Candie's [Popoholic]
Kat Von D is fucking Nikki Sixx [ASL]
Mischa Barton's side boob (NSFW ads) [Taxi Driver Movie]
90210 Theme [College Humor]
Sienna Miller is still pale and boring [Egotastic]
Marriage, Patricia Style (Married Life) [Pajiba]

A note of thanks to Michael Savage for the love last week and for his Jimmy Cliff love today. To wit:


Bonus: Since everyone we know (including us) is sick with that festering nightmare plague flu, we decided this video is quite possibly the best video ever. If you don't dance to this, then you need to get the fuck out, like right now.


P.S. I'm convinced Todd is related to that guy. He denies it, and he's really defensive about it. There's something to that, I think.

Jenna Jameson and Tito Ortiz yesterday at the Alan Del Rosario fashion show:

Jenna Jameson gets pounded while wearing pleather and PETA is against killing animals for their skin, so they have teamed up for PETA's new ad campaign, Pleather Yourself. PETA believes people should wear fake leather because real leather comes from animals who endure miserable lives in farms. PETA says:

Having starred in hundreds of adult films, Jenna is known for being a strong, sexually aware woman. If you're looking for advice on how to add some flare in the bedroom, she is the perfect expert to get help from. She is also a woman of her word and practices what she preaches. "I've worn a lot of pleather in my life," she says. "Anybody that knows Jenna Jameson knows I've lived half my life in it."

The irony must be lost on PETA, because Jenna Jameson had been looking like a chewed up piece of steak for a while. Good thing for PETA she's getting hot again. At first I was skeptical how masturbating to a picture of Jenna Jameson dressed up like pleather-wrapped Betty Page would help cows around the world sleep on satin pillows, and I kinda still don't, but it looks like PETA has been gracious enough to make sure I'll want to try. Thanks PETA!

Click here to watch the Jenna Jameson PETA video after the jump...


Classic Jenna (very, very, very NSFW):

Tito Ortiz could probably punch through my back and pull out my spine, so somebody needs to volunteer to tell him that Jenna Jameson is gross. I mean, it's cool that she would perform at his birthday, but if she could keep her clothes on that would be great. Three years ago she was a hot piece of ass, now she looks like something that was exhumed from a frontier burial ground. I'm thinking it's probably not a good sign when you have to perform a seance to get her to bust out of the cake.


Jenna performing at Tito's birthday in Vegas:

At the AVN Adult Expo 2008 on Friday, Jenna Jameson officially confirmed she is retired from porn. After walking on stage to applause, Jenna said, "Honesty is key ... and I will never ever ever spread my legs in this industry EVER!" Then she got booed. Not really sure why. Her ass has taken more beatings than Rocky, and she's had a vaginoplasty. They should have given her a plaque or some kind of vagina lifetime achievement award. At least give her a scrapbook and a nice shadowbox. Girls whose interests include "airtighting" love that kind of stuff.

Sylvester Stallone juiced Janice Dickinson [Dlisted]
1 Hayden 2 cups [Hollywood Tuna]
Paris Hilton makes too much noise [Hollywood Rag]
Penelope Cruz kisses a girl [City Rag]
Rachel Bilson won't get naked [Egotastic]
Christina Aguilera gives birth [MSNBC]
Nicole Richie gives birth [Just Jared]
Jessica Alba has a pregnant photoshoot (NSFW ads) [Drunken Stepfather]
Beyonce is a pink nightmare [Popsugar]
Shanna Moakler and Travis Barker have some sex (NSFW) [Taxi Driver Movie]
O.J. Simpson is going back to jail [ASL]
Stacy Keibler isn't just all legs [Popoholic]
Alessandra Ambrosio takes her top off for Rolling Stone [CO-ED Magazine]
The 12 Best Films You Didn't See [Pajiba]
American Psycho - Romantic Comedy [College Humor]

Jenna Jameson at the Troy Kingdom fashion show on January 10: