Kong Kardashian's plan to trick a rich NBA player into marrying her then divorcing him and taking half of his money under California's retarded no-fault divorce law has been shattered today. Well, that's because Lamar Odom's lawyer has made sure that when they get divorced, all Kong is gonna get is a parting gift and some cab fare. TMZ reports:

We've learned Lamar Odom has already met with his lawyer to hash out a prenup before making his wedding to Khloe Kardashian official. We've learned Odom went to the Beverly Hills law office of divorce-guru Neal Hersh last Friday to hash out the terms. Hersh won't return our call, but Odom's people tell us "Lamar has a set of balls" -- translation, he's not giving Khloe half of anything. We're told Lamar wants to make sure the money and other assets he brings into the marriage are solely his. Beyond that, we're told Lamar ain't giving Khloe half of his earnings going forward

I'm surprised woodland creatures aren't singing about true love's first kiss and magical brooms aren't coming to life to clean the marital suite, because this is obviously some sort of romantic fairytale.

Your thoughts, Mr. Wonka?



Kim Kardashian pumping gas:

People were a little upset yesterday, saying that I should be happy for Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom because you never know where love is going to lead your heart and if you meet someone, your heart just knows that you will be with this person forever and that's exactly what happened to Khloe and Lamar and instead of making fun of them, I should embrace their happiness like true love's first kiss. Okay, I will. But maybe you should tell them the same thing. TMZ reports:

TMZ has learned Lamar Odom and Khloe Kardashian are not legally married ... and they won't be until a prenup is signed. We've learned two high-powered family law attorneys are already squaring off, trying to hash out the prenup Odom wants as a condition to marriage. Neal Hersh is doing his bidding, while Lisa Meyer is repping Khloe. We're told the negotiations -- which began last Friday -- are already contentious.

Man, it really is hard to imagine a Kardashian would whore herself out for publicity, so I'm not really sure who to believe here. It's almost like the time David Beckham and I were planning to get married and he was all concerned about his money. Yeah, whatever, David. Question: Tell me how you feel about this. Try to control me boy you get dismissed. Always 50/50 in relationships.

IDLYITW is now a Khloe Kardashian picture free zone:

TMZ says this picture of newlyweds Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom were taken outside a L.A. hotel last night, but I'm pretty sure it's Greyskull and Odom just held aloft his magic sword, because he's giving this beast a piggy back ride. As you look at this picture, please keep in mind that Lamar Odom is 6'10", 230. He should be able to carry a human-sized chick in a papoose or in a basket like Little Red Riding Hood, but Khloe's snow shoes are hanging by this dude's knees. Dear God, the only way I'd want to see this chick naked is if she was on my soccer team and our plane crashed in the Andes.

The only pictures available right now of their "wedding". If you have a microscope and a low sense of self-worth, feel free to enjoy them: