Two men were killed and eight other were injured (one is in critical condition) after a stage collapsed and lighting rig fell on workers constructing the set for Madonna's concert at Velodrome stadium in the French city of Marseille. Daily Mail reports:

Madonna, currently on the Italian leg of her Sticky and Sweet tour, told an audience at the Fruili Stadium, in Udine, northern Italy, that she was 'devastated'. She added: 'I ask you for a moment to stop and think of the people who have lost their lives, we need to appreciate life, the people we love and our families.' At least eight others were injured in the collapse, including an American who is critical. Four had multiple injuries, including fractures, and three were lightly injured by falling rubble. Some 39 others were suffering from shock and needed treatment for trauma. The dead men are believed to have been hit by lighting due to be suspended above the temporary stage. Police have already launched a criminal inquiry into the accident. Jascques Dallest, the Marseille Prosecutor, confirmed that charges could include those of manslaughter and involuntary injuries. A source close to the investigation said one of four cranes being used to put the roof in place 'appeared to be faulty'. Madonna, 50, was due to perform to a sell-out crowd in Marseille on Sunday. The concert has been cancelled.

I'm sure the families of these victims are honored that Madonna took two minutes out of her show to acknowledge their deaths. I'm sure it makes them feel better. Because knowing someone you loved died so Madonna could put on a strap on and pretend to have anal sex with a black transvestite in a gold thong and a horse mask isn't it's own reward.

Here's Madonna crying on stage. Also included, mindless Madonna fans applauding and cheering at the sad news:

The Malawian government and adoption officials put up a good fight, but apparently Africa is still selling folks to rich white people. My great-grandfather would be so pissed right now. AP reports:

Madonna's new daughter has flown out of her native Malawi on a private jet headed for London, an airport employee and a person familiar with Madonna's adoption proceedings in this southern African country said Saturday. The airport employee, speaking on condition of anonymity because he was not authorized to discuss the matter, said 3-year-old Chifundo "Mercy" James left late Friday headed to London, with a stop in neighboring South Africa. The girl, the second child Madonna has adopted from Malawi, was reportedly accompanied on the flight by a nanny, a child nurse and a third aide.

It's awesome that Madonna would wait almost a year to adopt this baby, then be so overcome with joy that she'd be on the runway crying like at the end of The Color Purple. Oh, wait. Nevermind. She didn't. Way to be there, Madonna. You might as well just had the baby shipped by UPS or loaded on the plane in a puppy crate.

An oil painting completed in 2005 by Peter Howson called, "Madonna and Guy" is being auctioned off by Glasgow auctioneers, McTear's. Madonna looks like she's trying to trick Gretel into the oven normally, so please don't tell me this looks nothing like Madonna. Madonna could be dead for three days and I if I saw her I probably wouldn't know the difference.

I assume there was a preteen Cambodian boy prancing around his house in pink panties and setting off firecrackers, but I have no idea what queer French dude dressed in a bedazzled Peter Pan costume designed this mess. Madonna looks like Mumra if Mumra was nominated for What Not To Wear. Seriously, zombies could have just eaten my parents and my neighborhood could be under nuclear attack and I could design a dress better than this.

Now permanently relocated in New York after her divorce from her England-based ex-husband, Guy Ritchie, Madonna has been shopping for a house in the Hamptons and recently visited a 100 acre, 12,000-square-foot, Tuscan-style villa at Wolffer Estate Vineyards in Sagaponack. But of course this story wouldn't be complete without the part where Madonna thinks the world revolves her. Page Six reports:

Madonna then presented the estate with a 10-page list of demands, according to our source. Among the stipulations were that "no one could be in the riding ring at the same time she was. It was laughable. They turned her down flat." Since then, Madonna has kept her horses at pal Steven Klein's residence, where photographers snapped her when she fell from her horse three weeks ago.

My seething hatred for this narcissistic bitch and her asteroid sized ego is pretty well documented on this site, so I won't get into how I think this cunt should get dropped into a velociraptor cage. God, I hate her. When I see her face, it's like I'm one of the X-Men and my power is typing on the keyboard really hard. YOU HEAR THAT MADONNA?! I JUST BROKE THE M KEY! WHAT NOW BITCH?!

Madonna was taken to a New York hospital on Saturday where she treated for minor injuries and released after she fell off a horse at the South Hampton home of photographer Steven Klein. In related news, I just got a paper cut. Ouch, ouch! Mommy! Mommyyyyy!!!Us Magazine reports:.

"The accident occurred when the horse Madonna was riding was startled by paparazzi who jumped out of the bushes to photograph the singer, who was visiting friends on Eastern Long Island over the weekend," Rosenberg said in a statement to Usmagazine.com. "Madonna will be having further tests and will continue to remain under observation by doctors."

This makes the second time Madonna has fallen off a horse and walked away (this first was in 2005). What's the deal? Is her spinal cord made out of Bowflex weights? Why won't that shit break? I mean, she looks like she's in The Scorpion King's army already, what is it going to take for this hag to go away? I swear, after they admitted here I bet they brought her a virgin then covered Madonna in soil from her homeland.

Even though she made every day of his life during their marriage a living hell (here) then proceeded to vilify him and attempt to control his every move during their divorce proceedings (here and here), Madonna has reached out to Guy Ritchie with "tearful calls" over her failed adoption attempt. An insider tells The Sun:

"Civil conversations between them have been few and far between in the past year. But over the last week things have improved. Guy had Rocco over for a visit when Em called to see if he was OK, as she always does when she is away from the kids. Rocco was speaking to her and suddenly turned to Guy and said, 'Daddy, Daddy. Mummy is crying'. He then handed Guy the phone." Madge was devastated after being told three-year-old Malawi girl Mercy James can’t join her brood — LOURDES, 12, Rocco, eight, and three-year-old DAVID BANDA, who she adopted from Malawi in 2006. The insider continued: "It's unusual for Em to turn on the waterworks but this has really upset her. Explaining to Rocco why Mercy wasn’t coming home has been difficult. "Guy was incredibly sympathetic, calmed her down and told her to be happy with the family she had."

Fuck this bitch. I don't feel sorry for her. Madonna could adopt a hundred black babies in the United States if she wanted to (and seriously, more people should, and those who do should be commended), but that would mean having to condescend to obey such things as "laws" and "due process". It's easy when you're Madonna to bully some guy in an office whose computer is powered by a goat running on a treadmill, but let's see her try that shit with some old Italian lady behind a desk in NYC. There's a pretty good chance Madonna would be taken out in the street and stoned.

Although Madonna was denied in her attempt to adopt an "orphan" by an Malawian judge, she immediately announced plans to throw a fundraiser for the country in an obvious attempt to influence her appeal. Well, so much for that. Turns out the father of 3-year old Mercy James, James Kambewa, didn't even know his daughter was alive until Madonna made her headline news. Now the father wants to bring the child back home and support her. Thanks, Madonna! People reports:

Now a security guard, Kambewa says he learned the girl's mother, 15-year-old Mwandida Maunde, had died – and assumed their child was dead too. "Now that I know [Mercy] is alive I am willing to support her," Kambewa says. He and Maunde were both high school students when they conceived the child. "Her parents were furious that I had messed up their daughter. They caused hell for me so I left town," says Kambewa.

Man, what a touching story. Let's all hope that little Mercy James is safely reunited with her father and that Dorothy's house lands on Madonna. Oh heavens, how I love happy endings so! Guilty as charged!


Madonna and Stella McCartney in London last night: