The circle jerk that is the 81st Academy Awards announced their nominations today. Here are the top six categories:

BEST PICTURE
THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON
FROST/NIXON
MILK
THE READER
SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE

BEST DIRECTOR
THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON - David Fincher
FROST/NIXON - Ron Howard
MILK - Gus Van Sant
THE READER - Stephen Daldry
SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE - Danny Boyle

BEST ACTOR
Richard Jenkins for THE VISITOR
Frank Langella for FROST/NIXON
Sean Penn for MILK
Brad Pitt for THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON
Mickey Rourke for THE WRESTLER

BEST ACTRESS
Anne Hathaway for RACHEL GETTING MARRIED
Angelina Jolie for CHANGELING
Melissa Leo for FROZEN RIVER
Meryl Streep for DOUBT
Kate Winslet for THE READER

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Josh Brolin for MILK
Robert Downey Jr. for TROPIC THUNDER
Philip Seymour Hoffman for DOUBT
Heath Ledger for THE DARK KNIGHT
Michael Shannon for REVOLUTIONARY ROAD

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Amy Adams for DOUBT
Penelope Cruz for VICKY CRISTINA BARCELONA
Viola Davis for DOUBT
Tarija P. Henson for THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON
Marisa Tomei for THE WRESTLER

No Gran Turino, no The Dark Knight, no Wall-E, no The Wrestler for Best Picture? Man, thanks Academy! Movies about a Nazi guard who likes to be read to and interviews from thirty years ago sound way more exciting! I can't wait to see who wins!!

Heath Ledger on the set of his last film. He died one year ago today. R.I.P.:

Mickey Rourke is a mortal lock for a Best Actor nomination for his role as a washed up professional wrestler in Darren Aronofsky's The Wrestler, but Sean Penn is also considered a strong candidate for his work in Milk, in which he plays, Harvey Milk, California's first openly homosexual public official. Just don't tell Mickey Rourke that. The Daily Beast says:

After his December 23 appearance on David Letterman, Rourke told someone backstage that he was surprised that so many people seemed to think that Penn was his Oscar competition since "I'm not even sure he’ll get a nomination." On December 28, a Los Angeles entertainment honcho shared a text message that Rourke had sent him: "Look seans an old friend of mine and i didnt buy his performance at all—thought he did an average pretend acting like he was gay besides hes one of the most homophobic people i kno" [sic]

Sean Penn is a pretentious douchebag in real life, so this really doesn't come as a surprise. When he's not in the enabling confines of a movie set, he's punching photographers and eating with Hugo Chavez. Sure, he's a good actor, but so are those Geico cavemen. I mean, how did they learn how to speak English and ride motorcycles?! They're cavemen!

Once again, Marisa Tomei topless in The Wrestler. You're welcome, you perverts (NSFW):

Here's our list of top posts from 2008:

1. Jessica Alba is Unshaven


2. Lily Allen Nipple Slips Again


3. Megan Fox Has Nipples


4. George Clooney's Girlfriend is a Slut


5. Sarah Michelle Gellar is Slutty


6. Marisa Tomei is a Stripper


7. Dita Von Teese Has a Sex Tape


8. Kristin Davis Has a Sex Tape


9. Lindsay Lohan Sex Tape Picture?


10. Emma Watson Upskirt Time!

Marisa Tomei is naked in everything, so here she is in the new Darren Aronofsky flick, The Wrestler. And, hey look! She's topless. I bet you weren't expecting that. Unlike Rose McGowan and Lindsay Lohan, she plays stripper who actually takes her clothes off. She also apparently plays a stripper with a heart of gold. Much unlike the strippers I know with the fresh C-section scars and cocaine on their teeth. Oh yeah, that's right baby. You know daddy likey!

Click pictures for NSFW versions:

Here is one of the first stills of Darren Aronofsky's new movie, The Wrestler. Specifically, Marisa Tomei, 43, as a stripper named Cassidy. I'm gonna take a wild stab here, but I bet it turns out that she has a heart of gold.

Update: Click here for pictures of Marisa Tomei naked in The Wrestler.


Banner image credit: Slashfilm