Mila Kunis's cellphone was hacked, likely by the same person who hacked Scarlett Johansson's. There was a picture of a dick on it. TMZ reports:

Justin Timberlake wants to make it clear -- the explicit picture on Mila Kunis' cell phone -- showing a penis -- is NOT J.T. -- this according to a source close to Justin. TMZ broke the story ... Mila's cell phone was hacked, and two of the pics the hackers seized showed Justin -- one laying in bed, the other showing Justin with a pair of pink panties over his head. There is another pic of a penis but that's it -- there's no torso, no face ... and Justin has made it clear to people close to him -- he NEVER sent such a pic to Mila or to anyone for that matter.

A few other outlets said that whoever's peen it was isn't well-endowed, so if it's Justin's, it's a good thing there was no face attached. The only good that might come out of it would be for SNL to churn out a Lonely Island remix called "Dick In a Matchbox."

Screen Gems really wants you to see Friends With Benefits, so here's Mila Kunis in her panties and a see through shirt and drinking an ice coffee. I really don't know why they're trying to promote this film with her sexuality when the movie is about an unemployed guy who has friends with 401K's and access to a network of more than 500,000 participating quality health care professionals and centers throughout the country. CIGNA negotiates with these health care professionals to offer them the most affordable medical insurance value for their dollar. Why do we need to see her in her panties to promote a serious film like this? I don't understand why Hollywood can be so sexist sometimes.

So, apparently there's one perk to joining the military. Us Magazine reports:

When Sgt. Scott Moore posted a YouTube video last week inviting the Black Swan actress to accompany him to the Marine Corps Ball on Nov. 18, it probably seemed like a long shot. But at the urging of her Friends With Benefits costar, Justin Timberlake, Kunis agreed to head to Greenville, North Carolina to be Moore's date! In the video, Moore addressed the actress directly from Afghanistan. "Hi Mila, I just want to take a moment out of my day to invite you to the Marine Corps Ball with yours truly," he said. "So take a second to think about it, and get back to me." When FOX411 asked the actress if she knew about the invitation, Timberlake, 30, made certain that Kunis would go. "Have you seen this? Have you heard about this?" he asked her. "You need to do it for your country!" "I'm going to work on this, man," he said in a message to Scott. "This needs to go down!" "I'll go. I'll do it for you," Kunis said, before asking Timberlake if he was going to attend as well.

I'm gonna not gonna be cynical for a minute and overlook the fact that this great promotion for their movie No Benefits Attached To Friends With Strings, and say that this was pretty fucking cool of Mila Kunis. She probably won't feel as accomplished when she finds out she's going to Greenville, NC. Home of East Carolina University and date rape.

He grabbed her boobs! She grabbed his junk! Like OMG YOU GUYS!!! Us Magazine reports:

At Sunday's MTV Movie Awards, Justin Timberlake had a hands-on moment with his Friends With Benefits costar, Mila Kunis, when they presented the night's first award for Best Male Performance. "Even though we're in the movie Friends With Benefits, we've never dated," Timberlake, 30, told the audience. Added Kunis: "We're like brother and sister." "[We have a] totally platonic relationship, which is why I can do this," he said as he grabbed her boobs. In return, Kunis, 27, cupped his genitals. Presenting the award to Twilight's Robert Pattinson, Timberlake couldn't resist making one more joke after Kunis uttered the famous "and the winner is…" phrase. "I think we just found out," Timberlake said with a chuckle. "What a shameless reference to my penis!"

I was going to live tweet the MTV Movie Awards then I realized I wasn't 13 and the Heat/Mavericks game was on, so I guessed I missed this scripted and rehearsed moment between Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis. So, they're like brother and sister so they fondle each other? Are we supposed to know what that means? Was this some sort of demonstration to raise awareness for the tornado victims in Alabama? I don't get it.

Everyone knows by now that Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel broke up after four years because Timberlake wanted to take a Hollywood vagina tasting tour. But what you don't know is that Justin Timberlake is some sort of infidelity ninja, his penis lying in wait ready to strike at a moment's notice. Radar Online reports:

Star magazine claims that Justin had been “pursuing women behind Jessica’s back,” for a while and that he was spotted whispering with co-star Mila Kunis at a recent party. Justin reportedly “actively tried to pursue” Kunis last year, but she spurned his many advances. Mila and Justin filmed nude scenes together for Friends With Benefits in 2010, but despite his telling her that he and Jessica were secretly over, Mila didn’t take the bait. Knowing he still had a girlfriend, Mila didn’t accept his affections or advances. In addition, Timberlake was reportedly having “amazing sex” with Olivia Munn in October while they were filming together. According to other reports, Justin would often use a guy friend as his wingman and cover guy, having the buddy get a number from the girl and leave with her, while Justin would be the one who would eventually hook-up with her. As Justin’s fame is increasing with the attention he received from The Social Network, Jessica had tried being supportive, attending awards season parties with him, but the pair finally called it splits last week. And according to Us Weekly Timberlake was “miserable” with dating Biel for a couple of years and had been actively trying to end the relationship since January. “Justin thinks the breakup will be good because he can focus on his other ventures and just enjoy being single,” a source told the magazine. “You’d be surprised at how soon the love was lost on this one.

Don't get me wrong, Jessica Biel's ass could launch a thousand ships, but after four years sometimes you get tired of fucking a bitch. It happens. If you want unconditional love and someone to be happy every time you walk into a room, buy a dog. If you want to blow me in exchange for flowers and an 8:00 reservation at that restaurant you like, we can hang out until that gets boring.

Last week it was reported that Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel split up. They both claimed the split was amicable. Specifically amicable for Timberlake's penis, because rumors of him hooking up with Amanda Seyfried, Olivia Munn, and Mila Kunis were everywhere. Now, one business day later, reps for Mila Kunis have denied any involvement with Timberlake's penis. Which means, as it's been so aptly pointed out, she's totally had it in her mouth. People reports:

Just days after Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel announced their split, there is already speculation that the singer-actor's Friends with Benefits costar, Mila Kunis, was the cause of the break-up. Not true, says a source close to Timberlake, 30. "Mila had nothing to do with their break-up," the source says. "In fact, no one came between them. They decided their relationship ran its course and it was time to move on."..."They're not in a relationship," the source says. "They star in a movie called Friends with Benefits but they're just friends. That's it. They are not together."

Just like with anything in life, if you immediately get defensive and deny any involvement is something that is merely hinted, you're guilty. Just like the time Kate Upton said I was a gentle and caring lover with the stamina of an Ethiopian marathon runner. LIES SHE TELLS! LIES!

When asked for comment, Mila Kunis said, "LOL!" People reports:

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are no longer a couple. The two decided to end their relationship recently and "there are no hard feelings," a source tells PEOPLE exclusively. "It was completely mutual and they both decided it was time to move on." Reps for the couple released a statement Thursday, confirming the split: "Addressing the media speculation regarding Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake's relationship, we are confirming that they mutually have decided to part ways. The two remain friends and continue to hold the highest level of love and respect for each other."

If by mutual you mean, Timberlake has been knuckle deep in Amanda Seyfried, Olivia Munn, and Mila Kunis lately, then yeah, we can go with that. And I think we'll also go with this lovely Karlstad sectional sofa. It's range of coordinated covers makes it easy for me to give my furniture a new look.

Unlike Kirk Douglas' embalmed corpse, Mila Kunis was the hottest thing on stage last night. Mostly because of this dress. No, wait, I meant her boobs. Yeah, her boobs. Sorry about that. My grandma and I are practicing for a talent show, so I've had a lot on my mind lately. Speaking of which, gold sequins pants? Yes or no? I mean, my ass looks great, but I'm not sure gold is in my color wheel.