So, you remember when Jessica Simpson wore this shirt? Yeah, apparently Pamela Anderson really didn't like it.
The Sun reports:

Speaking on radio in Australia - where she's waiting to go into the Big Brother house - the star slammed her rival buxom blonde. Pammi blasted: "I think she is a bitch and a whore. Actually, I don't know if she was talking about food or men."

Jessica Simpson is an idiot, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say that Pamela Anderson was using the term "whore" figuratively here. Because if we were giving away gold medals to whores, Pamela Anderson would be in China in about a month hoping to set the world record in the Vagina Stretch.

Pam and Tommy Lee at Starbucks last week:


Jessica Simpson in Manhattan last week:

Pamela Anderson arrived in England's Heathrow Airport today and was apparently greeted by some of her fans. I don't want to give anything away, but I think the one holding the gay "PAM" sign has a secret.

Guests, which included Britney Spears and Pamela Anderson, at French fashion designer Christian Audigier's 50th birthday this weekend reportedly "went wild" when Michael Jackson walked on stage and grabbed the microphone. The article doesn't say why exactly. The Mirror UK reports:

Was this the moment he was going to break into song and end his years of silence? Er, no...all they got as Jacko, 49, stepped onto the platform was a whispered, "Hello". He added politely: "Christian is the King of Fashion" before turning on his heels and trouping off. An insider said: "Everyone went mad when he grabbed the microphone. The mood was electric. "But sadly there was no impromptu gig. It was a shame because he looked in pretty good shape. He was obviously just putting in an appearance for his old pal Christian."

I like football and girls, so I don't know who Christian Audigier is, but he seems like a pretty cool guy. All his friends seem to like kids a lot, and that's important, because they're our future.

Pamela Anderson is looking pregnant (again), which is weird, because I was under the impression that every dude on earth had moved passed this. Pamela Anderson hasn't looked like Pamela Anderson in about 10 years. Based on these pictures, it's hard to tell if she was driven to the White House Correspondents' Dinner in a limousine or in soil from her homeland. I get the feeling that if I took her panties off that the next things I would see would be sawdust and potpourri.

Fergie tries to get some Latin fans [Hollywood Rag]
Madonna and Gwyneth Paltrow look gross [Just Jared]
Celebrity plastic surgery on TV [City Rag]
Cheryl Tweedy has cleavage [Hollywood Tuna]
Victoria Beckham is still ugly [Dlisted]
Miley Cyrus has a lesbian dad (NSFW ads) [Drunken Stepfather]
Jessica Alba still sucks [Popsugar]
Katherine Heigl is smoking again [Popoholic]
Mischa Barton is pale and posing [Egotastic]
Mariah Carey might be fucking Nick Cannon [ASL]
Seinfeld Babies [College Humor]
They're Good at Being Bright (Smart People) [Pajiba]

Pam Anderson's book reading photo-op:


Personal update: The following song is dedicated to my mommy. I know she pretends she doesn't check in on me over he-ah, but hey ma! Pickle barrels in da Bronx and Otis, babe. Dis one's goin' out to you. Jag alskar dig!

After being married for less than four months to Rick Salomon, the guy she met in August by having sex with him in exchange for paying off a poker debt, Pamela Anderson is now pregnant. She has also decided to proceed with her divorce petition which she recanted last month. TMZ says:

You'll recall Anderson filed for divorce last month, but called it off just days later. But sources tell TMZ she is now moving forward with the divorce, even though we know she's pregnant with his baby. Salomon has told friends he believes she is "acting crazy" because of the pregnancy and hopes she will settle back into the marriage. Interestingly, in her divorce petition, Anderson asked for spousal support but not child support.The couple were married in Las Vegas on October 6.

Later, Pamela got into a catfight with Alexa Carrington, shot J.R. Ewing, had Victor Newman's baby, and whatever else means her life is a fucking soap opera.

The happy couple in November:

In 2007, Pamela Anderson divorced Kid Rock, had sex with a dude to pay off a gambling debt, and then married that guy who was in a sex tape with Paris Hilton. What can we expect in 2008? If you guessed "the exact same", you win! Pamela says:

Oh there's plenty," of problems, Anderson told PEOPLE as she headed to LAX nightclub in Las Vegas on New Year's Eve. "What can you do? We're all human. We're all trying." When asked about her plans for 2008, she said, "More of the same. More excitement, more fun."

Oh yeah, baby! Because nobody brings the excitement and fun like a 40 year old used up whore with Hep C! There's no telling what Pam has in store! Will she make an inappropriate life choice? Will she make another inappropriate life choice after that? The possibilities are endless!!

Pam on New Year's Eve:

Pamela Anderson made her final curtain call for the Las Vegas engagement of Hans Klok's "The Beauty of Magic" this weekend, and based on these pictures, it was just in time. The magic is gone. Pamela Anderson looks like she should be haunting a pirate ship, not prancing around in a bikini. She looks awful. Is Hans Klok some kind of warlock? Did he just raise Pamela Anderson from the dead? What kind of demonry is this?! No, Klok....wait....oh God, no...please...noooo!!