"Who let those nigras in here? Make them dance for my crispy chicken.
It's hard to imagine that an old, rich white lady from Georgia would be horrifically racist, except and Georgia and South Carolina is where Neo Nazis go to feel inferior, but Paula Deen and her broher, Bubba Hiers (it was either that or Cooter), are currently being sued by a former employee and general manager, Lisa Jackson, of their jointly-owned restaurant Uncle Bubba's. Apparently a few of the perks of working there is hearing Paula say nigger all day and watching Bubba jack off to porn. Radar Online reports:

Among the stunning allegations in the lawsuit: "In the presence of Ms. Jackson and Uncle Bubba's restaurant manager and a vendor, Bubba Hiers stated they should send President Obama to the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico so he could n***er-rig it." The lawsuit also claims that Deen herself used the N word in front of employees. According to the court documents, Jackson states that she was appointed by Deen to handle the catering and staff for Bubba's wedding in 2007, and she asked Deen what the servers should wear: "Well what I would really like is a bunch of little n***ers to wear long-sleeve white shirts, black shorts and black bow ties, you know in the Shirley Temple days, they used to tap dance around,” Jackson alleges Deen told her. "Now, that would be a true Southern wedding wouldn't it? But we can't do that because the media would be on me about that."

Bubba loves the ladies, y'all. Naked ladies.

The documents state that Jackson became the General Manager of Bubba’s Oyster and Seafood House in Savannah, Georgia, which is co-owned by Deen and Bubba, after the previous GM, who was male, was fired for having sexual relations with the servers. Deen allegedly said in a meeting in which Jackson was present, "If you think I have worked this hard to lose everything because of a piece of p**y, you better think again, and now I'm going to do something I have never done I am going to put a woman in a man's job." Jackson was given six months to turn the restaurant from a failure into a success and she did so, by doubling the profits of the restaurant, but she alleges she was sexually harassed by Deen's brother, who, amongst other accusations, routinely viewed pornography on a computer in a small office he shared with Jackson. "Bubba Hiers is a frequent customer of pornography web sites and would download and view such sites at work. In the small office he shared with Jackson, it was impossible for her to avoid the pornography," the lawsuit states. Hiers also asked Jackson to "bring pictures of herself when she was young for him to view," and that he would like to replace the staff with "Hooters girls," the lawsuit alleges.

As a brown man born and living in the south (specifically, Raleigh, N.C.), let me tell you that the racism here has been aged to perfection. Everyone is racist, but it's done with a friendly smile and overall jovial demeanor. I've been eagerly followed around a department store by a store manager because he "wanted to make sure I was taken of". So he asked me if I need help finding anything five times in fifteen minutes. I've been pulled over and immediately asked if I needed an interpreter, and when I handed him my ID and answered in French then asked him if he needed one, I was offered an apology for inconvenience and was told I was pulled over because I "fit a description". That description of course being "not white". But what's the most sad part about this whole story is the fact that Paula Deen probably said and meant those things in the most loving way possible and actually thought it would be a good idea except that fact that black people have rights now. Bummer. Also, it would kinda be funny at this point if a black guy named Diabetes killed her.

"Hey, Tim. The key is to make sure the middle finger and the thumb are placed right below the white ring on the football, almost even with one another. The smaller fingers then grip the seams and the index finger gives the hand some stability behind the ball LOL."

Paula Deen, beloved chef and sweet old lady who I want to hug while she makes me something with bacon and cheese in it, has finally addressed the rumors that she has Type 2 Diabetes. She does. How could this happen? She's overweight with high blood pressure and a high-fat diet, her diagnosis seems so random. CURSE YOU GOD! People reports:

From fried chicken to mac and cheese casseroles, Paula Deen has made her mark on the culinary world – and in the homes of fans – with recipes that don't skimp on cheese, cream and sugar. Not to mention butter ... whole sticks of it. And even as she reveals that she is living with Type 2 Diabetes, she says it won't stop her from eating the way she wants. "I was determined to share my positive approach and not let diabetes stand in the way of enjoying my life," Deen said Tuesday in a release announcing her launch of Diabetes in a New Light™, geared toward finding "simple ways" to manage challenges of the disease. "I'm excited to team up with Novo Nordisk on this initiative to show others that managing diabetes does not have to stop you from enjoying the things you love."

My biological father, Anthony Bourdain, who once called Deen "the most dangerous chef in America", is now kicking her in the diabetes while she's down.

"When your signature dish is hamburger in between a doughnut, and you've been cheerfully selling this stuff knowing all along that you've got Type 2 Diabetes ... It's in bad taste if nothing else," he said. "How long has she known? I suspect a very long time."

So, instead of changing her diet, Paula Deen is getting in bed with a pharmaceutical company to make money off her disease. And to make butter flavored insulin or something I guess. They're just brainstorming at this point I think.