Sienna Miller's vagina is like Ellis Island, so it's surprising that she's in Barbados with just her mom. She was hot as hell in Layer Cake, but these pictures aren't really doing anything for me. I want to masturbate to these, but I'm afraid I might wake up two months later with the doctor telling my mother it was a miracle.

Sienna Miller and I apparently only used to like people who were married or engaged, but I guess that's all changed now because she was in Ibiza with her new boyfriend this week and he's...wait for it...single!! Man, can you believe it?! Who knew that was even possible?! What new worlds and wonders await!

This was the most exciting meeting of the Medina City Council ever. [BestWeekEver]

Lady GaGa does his/her best to eradicate the need for pants on The View. Site NSFW. [DrunkenStepfather]

Jennifer Lopez is meeting with her manager, which means sometime in the near future my eyes and/or ears will spontaneously start to bleed. [LaineyGossip]

Sienna Miller was hurt during a catfight on the set of GI Joe. [ImNotObsessed]

If you didn't see Watchmen, but you do want to see Malin Akerman's nipples as she has sex in the Owl Ship, this link is for you. [Egotastic]

Kristin Stewart is going to stop making Twilight movies for long enough to ruin the memory of Joan Jett. [ICYDK]

Apparently stealing another woman's husband and being photographed topless on two separate occasions while you were with him, isn't exactly the basis of a strong relationship. Who knew?! MSNBC reports:

"Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty have split, the actress confirmed to Us Weekly on Friday. "I'm single at the moment, and I'm completely happy with that," she told the magazine at the Hollywood Dominoes VIP launch in London. "It's nice not to have a relationship that the press constantly want to scrutinize and discuss. I'm cool with being on my own."

If this interviewer was a dude, there's a good chance Sienna banged him after it was over, because to reiterate, it's Sienna Miller. That's kinda her thing. She could be trapped on Skull Island, and at best, King Kong would only have to use antibiotics and some sort of medicated cream.

These are NSFW:

Don't feel bad for Sienna Miller. Being homewrecking slut who everybody hates does have its advantages. Look, free decorating!


Photos: Splash

In a shocking development, actor Balthazar Getty has announced in a statement today that his marriage to Rosetta Getty, his wife of eight years and mother of his four children, is over. Man, I wonder if it has anything to do with the billion pictures of him fondling Sienna Miller's tits? Somebody has to get to the bottom of this! The Daily Mail reports:

Sienna Miller's lover Balthazar Getty has publicly announced his marriage to Rosetta Getty, the mother of his four children, is over....He said in a statement: 'The breakdown of a marriage is a very difficult and painful experience especially when children are involved. In light of the fact that many pictures have surfaced in print and on the Internet which has caused myself and my family great embarrassment, I felt it necessary to at least acknowledge publicly that yes indeed my wife and I have separated and I will not be commenting any further.'"

Balthazar needs to look on the bright side. At least the kids aren't involved anymore. The bad news is that in 10 years when Sienna Miller is found stuffed in an old refrigerator with a plastic bag over her head, the police will have at least four suspects.

Sienna Miller hasn't been on here in a while, mostly because she shocked the world by keeping her vagina on a leash long enough for the mainstream press to believe that she was intending to marry actor, Rhys Ifans. Of course, Sienna dumped him without warning or reason (Ifans was photographed a few days later crying on a street curb). Now, not even a month later, here she is in Italy over the weekend flashing her tits with actor and heir to the Getty Oil Company, Balthazar Getty. You know, the kid in Lord of the Flies. Oh yeah, and the dude with the wife and four kids. Just so we're clear, Sienna Miller is a legendary epic whore. Something must be done. Seriously, it might take Beowulf to kill this bitch.

If you've never seen Sienna Miller's tits before, how are you enjoying your first time on the Internet? Really? That's great, man. Really great.