Porn star, Joslyn James, one of the 14 whores Tiger was banging while his wife was home with his two children, is claiming that he got her pregnant twice. Look at the banner picture. Tiger would had unprotected sex with that. Just wanted to throw that out there. The Daily Mail reports:

Porn star Joslyn James has told a U.S. TV show how she always had unprotected sex with the golf star during their three-year affair. The actress, who has appeared in adult films such as Big Breasted Nurses and My Sex Teacher, tells Inside Edition that using protection 'was never talked about'. James, 32, said she miscarried in her first pregnancy at about the same time Tiger's wife, Elin Nordegren, gave birth to daughter Sam Alexis in June 2007. The next pregnancy was aborted close to the birth of Woods' son, Charlie Axel, in February 2009, James claims. The golfer was not told about either pregnancy, she said. James tells the TV programme: 'I just didn't want to ruin anything. 'Actually, the day I was going to tell him, I had a miscarriage,' she said. 'After I lost the baby I didn't want to talk about it.' The porn star added that the first pregnancy and miscarriage made her 'more emotionally attached' to the golfer.

This is the same woman who owes $12,000 in back child support, so let's not get too carried away here. She didn't have a miscarriage. In a more likely scenario, she had an abortion when the ultrasound didn't look like a bag of gold.

Call-girl Loredana Jolie (this chick - NSFW), one of Tiger's parade of whores, is shopping a tell-all book
New York Post reports:

"He would engage in sex from 9 p.m. until the sun came up the next morning. But he wasn't a healthy guy. He couldn't sleep and would stay up all night. I am not really sure rehab for sex addiction will help him," Jolie told Page Six yesterday... "Tiger's sexual fantasies were not normal," the wannabe author says. "He likes role-playing, he likes to be the guy in control and wearing a suit while there are girls performing girl-on-girl and guys entertaining guys. By that, I mean they would dance for each other like girls would do for a man," the would-be author claimed. "He'd have different girls all the time, entertaining, role play, fetishes, stuff like that . . . But he would only watch . . . He would also ask me to text him pictures of myself when we weren't together." Braun, who first revealed Loredana was one of Tiger's favorite girls, told us, "The girls would tell me what went on with Tiger and I never heard of any men. He always asked for girls and liked threesomes. But I wouldn't be surprised by anything. He had male friends, and I am sure they got involved."

Really? That's freaky? Am I missing something? Sorta like the Vietnamese prostitute in my hot tub who's missing a head? Hey, it's not my fault she couldn't pronounce the safe word.

Three months ago, Tiger Woods was plowing through whores like Jack The Ripper, but as it turned out, his wife's pimp hand was stronger so when she found out, she caved his head in then hired a divorce lawyer. Shockingly, Tiger now realizes he might have a problem. Radar Online reports:

Tiger Woods is getting treatment at a top sex addiction program in Hattiesburg, Miss., sources have told RadarOnline.com exclusively. The troubled golf great checked into Pine Grove Behavioral Health and Addiction Services, sources say.The clinic, considered one of the top in the nation for sexual addiction, is directed by Dr. Patrick Carnes, who has pioneered treatment for sexually compulsive behavior. According to the Web site for the facility, patients usually spend about six weeks in treatment. Sex addicts receive a variety of treatments, including group therapy, cognitive behavior therapy and something called “shame reduction.”

Mississippi? Who picked this place, his wife? I realize we have a black-ish President, but I can't shake the feeling that a black guy who is famous for fucking white girls might have more to worry about than primal scream therapy when he's sitting in an unsecured location down south.

These pictures of Jennifer Hawkins in a bikini have nothing do to with this story other than the fact that she's not Tiger Woods:

Apparently sticking his dick in every vagina within 3 wood range wasn't enough for Tiger Woods, because according to a tell-all book being shopped around by Loredana Jolie Ferriolo, one of the chicks in Tiger's coven of mistresses, Tiger likes to have sex with men.

RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively that Loredana has claimed she saw Tiger having sexual relationships with other men. That shocking twist is something no other mistress has claimed and there has been no proof. But Loredana recently attempted to sell her story for $1 million and graphically described group sex that included incidents of Tiger with other men, RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively. Loredana says she is planning to spill all about how she and Tiger "came about, his healthy appetite for arranged sex, threesomes, girls next door, girl-girl, and an answer to all the rumors surrounding Woods' sexuality." That hint about Tiger's sexuality is the key to Loredana's hopes for making a seven-figure deal, no matter how unlikely that seems. Loredana, a gorgeous blonde from Sicily, has told people she was one of Tiger's favorite mistresses. One of her representatives told RadarOnline.com: "She is in talks with a number of publishing companies regarding a tell-all book deal." Loredana has kept a low public profile since being named as a Tiger mistress and lately has been spotted at an upscale Florida country club on the golf course, taking golf lessons.

I'm really beginning to think that people are born homosexual, because there's no way a normal dude would look at another dude's ass and a perfectly good vagina then choose to take a pair of boxer's off with his teeth instead of a pair of panties. Well, except for that time David Beckham blew me. I had just got out of a bad relationship and I had a lot to drink, and he...well, he was being so nice and I...um, we started talking and then...oh, don't look at me like that! How dare you judge me??!!

UPDATE: Yeah, so, this may or may not be a hoax. Damn you, Internet! First the Nigerians didn't deposit that money into my account like they promised now this!! (A special thanks to Kristin for the heads up. I mean it's not like I was going to research this. What am I a reporter?)

Furman Bisher, a renowned and respected sports journalist who is called the "dean" of Masters journalists by The Golf Channel, knows why Tiger Woods hasn't been seen for five weeks and repeatedly dodged requests to be interviewed by police. Um, that would be because he was having FACIAL RECONSTRUCTION SURGERY! Daily Mail reports:

According to Bisher, Woods's wife Elin struck her husband in the face with a nine iron after she confronted him over text messages from mistress Rachel Uchitel. He said: 'At one point Tiger turned away to look at the TV, and as he turned back, Elin hit him on the right side of the face with the head of a 9 – iron. 'When she struck Tiger, she put a huge gash in the right side of his face next to his nose (causing his nose to bruise some), and virtually knocking two of his upper teeth out, and breaking the bone on the upper right side. 'Tiger ran scared as hell out of the house (which is why he had on no shoes) with Elin swinging the golf club throughout the hallway to the garage (i.e. causing the severe damage which has been reported). 'Tiger hoped in the Escalade and tried to leave; and as we know Elin knocked out the windows in the Escalade. When Tiger crashed, Elin panicked and was not sure what to tell the police (which is why there are two conflicting stories from her).' Bisher said after Woods checked out of hospital he was flown by private jet to Phoenix, Arizona, where he met with a plastic surgeon and cosmetic dentist. The sportswriter said Woods's absence from Florida was the reason he failed to meet with Florida Highway Patrol (FHP) officers on three occasions to discuss the crash. Bisher writes: 'If you remember FHP kept showing up at Isleworth to talk to Tiger, and was told by another FL attorney (who Tiger hired for PR reasons) Tiger was not ready to talk. 'Well now we know why, he was in Phoenix, and did not arrive back in Orlando until either late last Wednesday night or early Thursday morning. 'The surgeries were more intense than what they had originally planned, which meant Tiger was in PHX longer than he should have been.'

Holy shit! Elin Woods is like some Lifetime Movie where the woman gets exposed to Kryptonite and gains the power of kicking your damn ass. "John Connor gave me a picture of you once. I didn't know why at the time. It was very old - torn, faded. You were young like you are now," a man with Tiger Woods was quoted as saying.

Tiger Woods hasn't made a public appearance since Thanksgiving and many people believe that he is hiding out on his $22 million yacht, Privacy. The $22 million yacht that is seven miles from where these pictures of Rachel Uchitel in a bikini were taken this weekend. Is this some sort of coincidence? Does my ass look hot in my new Diesel jeans? So many unanswered questions!

Brushing over the fact that she chased him down the street and beat him like a pinata with a golf club, Elin Nordegren is convinced Tiger Woods' vagina tour makes him an unfit father. She now wants full custody of their two children and $300 million. National Enquirer reports:

Tiger Woods wife, Elin Nordegren, reputedly wants full custody of their children convinced the potent putter's escapades have made him unfit as a father..."She wants 100 percent divorce, 100 percent custody of the children, and half of everything. And she won't be changing her mind," an Elin insider told UK tab News of the World. Elin has hired celeb pit ball divorce lawyer Sorell Trope to fun for at lwast half of Tiger's estimated $60 million fortune - although that shrinks each day as more sponsors drop the King of Swing from their rosters.

Sources say that Elin is doing this solely for her children, Sam, 2, and Charlie, 1, and that they are her top priority. "Oh, and money, " Elin Nordegren was overheard saying, "Don't forget money."

When your husband and father of your two children needs an exploding collar around his penis to keep him from trying to bang every woman he sees and is rumored to be still in constant contact with Rachel Uchitel, taking half of his billion dollar fortune just seems like the right thing to do. Oh, and beheading. Don't forget beheading. Radar Online reports:

Tiger Woods' wife, Elin Nordegren, who has already been spotted in public sans wedding ring, has begun seeking legal representation to represent her in a forthcoming divorce, according to various Web reports Wednesday. The 29-year-old mother-of-two reportedly has meetings slated for next week with top legal professionals to blueprint a split that could cost the golfer as much as half of his billion dollar fortune. One name that had been mentioned, though remains unconfirmed, is lawyer Sorrell Trope, who has handled proceedings for stars including Nicole Kidman, Nicolas Cage and Britney Spears.

I'm not really sure how Tiger thought this was gonna turn out, but I bet he never thought it would end with his wife laying naked on bricks of gold on her yacht while shirtless Latin men lick her toes and explore her anus like Sir Walter Raleigh.

Elin Nordegren in Florida on December 15th: