Tired of looking like a WAG (whatever the hell that means), Victoria Beckham underwent her third boob job last month to shrink her ridiculous looking 34DD bolt-ons to 34B's. Mail Online reports:

The former singer-turned-fashion designer is believed to have had the procedure done last month. She saw a Los Angeles surgeon for her third boob job and had a set of implants removed to reduce her assets from a busty 34DD to a less obtrusive 34B. Victoria is now said to be recovering in France with husband David, 34, and their sons Brooklyn, ten, Romeo, six, and four-year-old Cruz. A source told The Sun: 'Victoria has wanted her implants taken out for a while. 'She felt that was part of her old WAG image - the big hair, big boobs and fake tan - and that she has moved on since those days. 'She had the op three weeks ago and is very pleased with the results.

So to recap, Victoria Beckham was born a 34A, went to a 34D, then to a 34DD and now down to a 34B. I appreciate the fact that she keeps trying so hard, but when you look like something off Antz, it doesn't really matter how your boobs look. Victoria Beckham is basically Miss Piggy with bulimia and a plastic surgery obsession. It's amazing that she's been able to hang on to David Beckham as long as she has. Sure, he sounds like a 10-year old 1896 paperboy when he talks, but he could walk in to a sorority house right now, and at worst, be the third prettiest one there. This is gonna sound way gayer than it should, but I'd probably let him hit it. Besides, who are we kidding? I've had worse.

I know there's a lot of people who think Victoria Beckham is hot, but she sorta looks like a mummy and her nose belongs on something winning a blue ribbon at the State Fair. I don't get it. Besides she weighs like 40 pounds. I might as well have sex with a Lego Posh Spice. I've done some research on this, and I can't seem to find any evidence to tell me it wouldn't feel like the same thing.



Photo credit: Splash

Macy Gray is right about one thing: "Drink water." It's very important.

This post of sad Jessica Alba doesn't have a title, which makes it all the more puzzling, and awesome. [Hollywood Gossip]

If Megan Fox can't get Brian Austin Green to care, I'm sure we're all in line to replace him. [LaineyGossip]

Hayden Panettiere squished her boobs for the Golden Globes. There wasn't that much to squish in the first place. [Bastardly]

Odette Yustman is going to be in Esquire, and one picture has leaked. One picture of Odette Yustman deserves a link. [Popoholic]

Romana from South Carolina like to drink to Thunderstruck by AC/DC. We might be compatible. [CollegeHumor]

Lucy Pinder is some British woman who was first to get voted off Celebrity Big Brother. Yet she was on camera enough for a montage clip of her "breast bits." [Hollywood Tuna]

Victoria Beckham doesn't always look good, so this ad for Armani Underwear is quite the occasion. [PinkIsTheNewBlog]

David Beckham is hotter than most of the chicks I've dated, so you can see how Victoria Beckham must feel knowing she looks like a leather cricket. In case you don't know, David Beckham was scheduled to do an interview with Italian television host, Ilaria D'amico (this chick). Then Victoria typed her named into Google. The Sun says:

"The Italian media is claiming ILARIA D'AMICO was set to interview Becks tomorrow when he is officially unveiled as AC Milan's new signing. But "at the request of the Beckham camp", the interview has been scrapped after Posh apparently "researched Ilaria on the Internet". Instead, Becks will be presented to the media in a standard press conference. Italian newspaper La Repubblica claims Victoria's "jealousy" was the reason why the interview with Sky Sports presenter Ilaria was dropped."

Since I'm committed to hard-hitting investigative journalism, I also researched Ilaria on the Internet. Who knows why Posh freaked out and cancelled the interview? Could it have been because of this? Or this? Or maybe this? I don't really know her reasons. Although I think it has something to do with tits.

Ilaria D'Amico:


Beckhams and Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes on a dinner date together last month:

Posh Spice is a pig nosed elf on the stroll [Hollywood Tuna]
Salma Hayek is a breastfeeding addict [Dlisted]
Shauna Sand is ridiculous [Hollywood Rag]
Amanda Bynes panty upskirt (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Sarah Jessica Parker is doing something blah blah I don't care [Popsugar]
Ari Gold is king douche [City Rag]
Shania Twain is back [Lainey Gossip]
Miranda Kerr does Ocean Drive [Popoholic]
Lydia Hearst gets naked for magazines (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]
Jennifer Garner is still pregnant [Just Jared]
Gemma Arterton is a Bond Girl [Egotastic]
Michael Jackson's pedo palace gets sold [Socialite Life]

About the video: That song has been stuck in my head since last week, so you're welcome for sharing my torture with you. I'm passing it on to you because it's haunting me and will probably kill me in seven days. (Via: Fark)

This mashup is pretty darn intoxicating:

Victoria Beckham is reportedly ready to have another child, but doctors have told her that she can't have another C-section (it would be her 4th) or she will cause damage to her body. Herald Sun reports:

The former Spice Girl - who has three sons, 9-year-old Brooklyn, 5-year-old Romeo, and 3-year-old Cruz with husband David Beckham - is determined to have a little girl, but has been told she could damage her body if she has a fourth caesarean. "She wanted to try for a baby after the Spice Girls finished touring," a source said. "But she's put her plans on hold while she sees what can be done to help her. She knows she is putting her health at risk if she dismisses the advice of her doctors and has another C-section." Doctors are concerned the 34-year-old could need an emergency hysterectomy if the op goes wrong."

I guess "damage" is relative, because her tits look like she owed money to the mob one time and her nose, for all intents and purposes, looks like something from Charlotte's Web. It's safe to say that she could have this baby by squatting near an oak tree with a stick in her mouth and not look any worse.


Photos: Splash

Christina Aguilera is drunk again [Dlisted]
Sarah McLachlan is in a bikini (NSFW ads) [Drunken Stepfather]
Supernanny offers Britney Spears advice [Hollywood Rag]
John Mayer's vacation away from Jennifer Aniston [Popsugar]
Josie Maran his a hot mess [Hollywood Tuna]
Mila Kunis has gas [Just Jared]
Angelina Jolie's nanny tells all [City Rag]
Aisleyne Horgan Wallace is topless (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart are engaged [ASL]
Kim Kardashian is all ass [Egotastic]
Loads of Laughter [College Humor]
Grace Park does Complex magazine [Popoholic]

Posh Spice in terrifying new Marc Jacobs ads:

The "Project Runway" Season 4 Fall 2008 fashion show was yesterday, where Victoria Beckham was revealed to be remaining guest judge for the hit Bravo show's fourth season. Beckham will join actress Meryl Streep and Streep's daughter, Mamie Gummer, along side Michael Kors, Nina Garcia, and Heidi Klum. Us Weekly says:

Victoria Beckham is helping the aspiring designers on Project Runway make it work. The Spice Girl, who topped Mr. Blackwell's 48th annual Worst-Dressed women list earlier this year, will guest judge on the show's season four finale, airing March 5."

I'm much too dedicated to my science and philanthropy to be interested in such silly pursuits as fashion, but Heidi Klum and coked-up models interest me a great deal. Also interesting is what Meryl Streep named her daughter. Is she some sort of Civil War maid? I don't know, I've never seen her. So if you watch the finale and you see somebody boiling water to deliver the white baby, you'll probably be safe in assuming that was her.

Click thumbnails for larger images: