In the airport returning home to America as a conquering hero after her concert in Australia, Whitney Houston looked fresh and relaxed and obviously disappointed in the quality of crack available in Australia. "Frankly, it's just not that good," Whitney was overheard saying, "It's just not that good at all."


Banner pic credit: TMZ via Splash News

Yeah, so remember back in the early 90's when you would turn on the radio and every station was playing a song from The Bodyguard soundtrack? Do you also remember wearing Red Camel shoes with white socks? What was up with that? Anyway, Whitney's signature song for the rest of her career after that was I Will Always Love You. She's smoked asteroids of crack since then, so imagine the awe and wonder of the audience when she took the stage in Brisbane to sing it. Then imagine them eight minutes later. Here's a hint: It's not good.

Mirror UK has a picture of Whitney Houston getting off the plane in Korea where she's set to perform. I don't know if any Koreans are in the market for a $10 cordless drill at 2am, but I get the feeling it might be their lucky day.

In her first live television performance in 12 years, Whitney Houston was singing her new song on X-Factor Saturday night when the strap to her dress popped off. If you can make it to the 2:30 mark, enjoy. If not, that's cool. It's a crackhead falling out of her dress. This video is basically an episode of COPS except with a way better light show.

Whitney Houston is in danger of losing her $6 million New Jersey estate at a sheriff's auction on January 4 if she is unable to come up with over $1 million. According to county tax records, the mortgage and taxes on the property haven't been paid this year.

Houston's estate encompasses two lots, with the lot for sale assessed at $889,300. The adjacent property is valued at more than $5.6million, reports the Daily Record. Houston purchased the properties nine years ago for $2.7 million. To pay off the mortgage, Houston was to shell out $4,711.18 per month from June 2004 until May 2034, for a total of about $1.7 million, the paper reports. If the past-due payments are made, the sale could be called off, says Gayl Spivak, an attorney representing Mortgage Electronic Registration Systems."

This sounds scary and all, but it will never happen. Even though she's a recovering crackhead, Whitney has thousands of friends, each with over a million dollars laying around. She's not going anywhere. Unlike Bobby Brown's sperm. Which apparently just got Karrine "Superhead" Steffans pregnant. In case you didn't pick up on that, she got her nickname from having lots penises in her mouth. Bobby Brown tricked a woman who has "swallows" on her resume into getting pregnant by telling her he had a vasectomy when he didn't. His other brilliant ideas include fighting a bear with a toy light saber.

Whitney on October 28th at the 17th Mercedes-Benz Carousel of Hope Ball:


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